Jump to content

How to get rid of bums outside my window


Kalashnikov

Recommended Posts

Yeah, right.

 

K, so if that was my place, especially if I owned it, I'd simply kick fucking holes through them. No discussion.

 

They have zero respect for you (ok, much homelessness is due to psych issues, but you ain't a case worker, what are you going to do?), as evidenced by they way they leave the place.

 

So I would have no respect for them and using the front of my house would have serious costs attached to it.

 

Some mates, balaclavas and bats. Clean the street.

Edited by Hua Guofang
  • Like 1
  • Truth 1
  • LOL! 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

This forum is supported by the 12ozProphet Shop, so go buy a shirt and help support!
This forum is brought to you by the 12ozProphet Shop.
This forum is brought to you by the 12oz Shop.
2 hours ago, Hua Guofang said:

Yeah, right.

 

K, so if that was my place, especially if I owned it, I'd simply kick fucking holes through them. No discussion.

 

They have zero respect for you (ok, much homelessness is due to psych issues, but you ain't a case worker, what are you going to do?), as evidenced by they way they leave the place.

 

So I would have no respect for them and using the front of my house would have serious costs attached to it.

 

Some mates, balaclavas and bats. Clean the street.

Edgy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm laughing because it sounds like you guys were expecting some quaint tree on a shady street overlooking a meadow, like some shit you'd see Dorothy skipping past in the Wizard of Oz.

 

Fuck no. It's dirty as shit. But they just don't care. With the way the roots are they just like to use it as a chair... if I had logic for it, I'd understand better. Actually I kind of do have logic. It's down the block from a shitty bar that once in a while they can afford to go drink at, and also down the street from a hood liquor store. I've also seen the crack man roll up and serve them on a bicycle a few times. Location, location, location.

 

I don't own my place, I rent. If I owned I'd definitely be out there with bear mace or something, but I just want them to shut the fuck up. I don't even care that they're out there, it's just that they're so. fucking. loud.

 

I feel sorry for whoever was naive enough to park their car on the street right there (that red SUV/crossover), because that definitely became a bum resting post or a bum table. My girl came over yesterday and she was like, "When I turned the corner I saw there was a spot right out front, but then I was like oh... yeah... no."

Edited by Kalashnikov
  • LOL! 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I dunno man it sounds like a stale mate to me.  You're not willing to do anything and they're not willing to leave on their own because it's a sweet spot.  There have been several suggestions that would make the tree inhospitable for bums.  How much do you REALLY want them gone?

 

I'll tell you all a story about calling the cops on people.  The neighbors on the other side of my duplex, that share a driveway with me, well it was an older Mexican lady (in her mid 30s or so) and this younger wigger white kid (in his early 20s).  I don't know how or why he decided that this much older woman with kids was the place to rest the sloppy bone but it's whatever.  So they moved in, and we'd hear them fighting sometimes..... and we'd ignore it.  One night while we were laying in bed they started fighting except this time it sounded like he was killing her.... the way she was screaming.  We both decided, "no fuck that we're calling the cops."  And we did.

 

That was only the first incident, this same thing went on 2-3 times a week.  He kicked down the front door of the house.  Oh, mind you this little fuck mean mugs you as he is walking the neighborhood street back and forth from his Church's Chicken job.... no bullshit.  I'm like 10-15 years his senior at least and this little bad ass wigger is living in the same house as me and acting like an asshole in a way that is affecting my rest and relaxation.  Absofuckinglutely not.  I never interacted with the kid much so he had no reason to mean mug me other than he was on some, "i have to look hard as possible all the time or people will know my true bitch colors."

This kid proceeds to get arrested 3 times on our front porch and I haven't seen police in our neighborhood before this goon moved in next door.  My other neighbors up the street are pretty serious rednecks.... like I'm talking 24v cummins parked in the driveway drinking beer until bedtime everyday after 5pm.... and they hear arguing down by my house one night.  They walk over, drunk, ready to start some shit if shit needs to get started..... and find ol wigger dude and the lady arguing in the front yard and she's acting like he was physically fighting with her.  My neighbor told him to get the fuck out of the house and start walking.  Which is hilarious, kicked him out of his own house.

 

The point I'm making is that, there was no "nice" way to deal with this fuck.  They eventually moved out because I'm friends with the landlord and got pretty tired of seeing the police over here, listening to fighting while I'm trying to sleep, and getting mean mugged on my street by some little dumbass I could easily twist into a pretzel.  I wonder if they're still together in their new home, repeating the same things.  Good riddance fuckos, glad the police got involved with you all several times.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 10/5/2018 at 2:02 AM, Kults said:

Edgy

Not meant to be. 

 

The tree is smaller than I expected it to be, I was picturing it with larger roots to sit on, like a Morten Bay Fig, or something.

 

Its the rubbish they leave scattered about that would put me over the line, more so if I owned the property. 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Agreeing with some recent posts.  You have several good ideas of how to handle this yourself, and if you're not going to follow any of them then turning it back to the landlord is really your best bet.  Honestly, when you first told the story and mentioned something about the landlord gave you free reign to take care of it..... my initial thought was you just gave dude free bum removal and took his battle on yourself.  Not that you couldn't or shouldn't do something as you do live there, but unless your landlord is family or something that fucker takes your money so you can have a roof, he makes money off you living there.  The property, and keeping it nice and shit- that's his job and part of your hard earned rent $$ goes for that.  Let him tell them to fuck off, let him put up a sign, let him call the cops if needed.  BTW, won't advocate for or against you or anyone caling the cops here but will say if they are called you might make it easier on everyone if you tell the cops what outcome you want- like, drive up, put a light in their face, and tell them to move on they can't hang out here anymore.  You might still get a cop who's an asshole responding but telling some bums to leave an area can be lazily done from their car window vs having an officer actually have to interact with and cause further problems for you and your bums. 

 

Also been meaning to mention how much the oontz has changed!  Doubt there's be all these people saying call the cops 10 years ago and this thread would be flooded with stop snitching memes.  Chalk it up to 'maturity'?  

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, One Man Banned said:

Agreeing with some recent posts.  You have several good ideas of how to handle this yourself, and if you're not going to follow any of them then turning it back to the landlord is really your best bet.  Honestly, when you first told the story and mentioned something about the landlord gave you free reign to take care of it..... my initial thought was you just gave dude free bum removal and took his battle on yourself.  Not that you couldn't or shouldn't do something as you do live there, but unless your landlord is family or something that fucker takes your money so you can have a roof, he makes money off you living there.  The property, and keeping it nice and shit- that's his job and part of your hard earned rent $$ goes for that.  Let him tell them to fuck off, let him put up a sign, let him call the cops if needed.  BTW, won't advocate for or against you or anyone caling the cops here but will say if they are called you might make it easier on everyone if you tell the cops what outcome you want- like, drive up, put a light in their face, and tell them to move on they can't hang out here anymore.  You might still get a cop who's an asshole responding but telling some bums to leave an area can be lazily done from their car window vs having an officer actually have to interact with and cause further problems for you and your bums. 

 

Also been meaning to mention how much the oontz has changed!  Doubt there's be all these people saying call the cops 10 years ago and this thread would be flooded with stop snitching memes.  Chalk it up to 'maturity'?  

My last response was unnecessarily harsh so let me rephrase. 

 

Going after bums with baseball bats for leaning on a car is straight out of r/iamverybadass.

Chalk it up to maturity or the world changing in 20 years but I find that reaction unfortunate to say the least. 

 

Cant have it both ways, either you're a street guy ( in which case asking for illegal advice on a forum is hilarious) or you can call the cops like 99.9% of normal people.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Alright, so I ordered some of those stink bombs from back in the day. I think that's the best idea. The sugar water will attract wasps but it's just going to wash away, and the stink bombs will make it so they just can't stand the smell and won't sit there. I am gonna bitch to the landlord though I think. Like yeah they're not technically on the property, but the maintenance guy is always out there picking up their trash and beer cans and shit.

 

Aside from that though, I guess that's about it. And yeah I agree, this forum is definitely different than it was 10 years ago. I'd have to assume most of us are late 20s at youngest now, 30s, maybe a few people in their 40s. Getting old sucks.

  • Props 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 hours ago, Kalashnikov said:

Alright, so I ordered some of those stink bombs from back in the day. I think that's the best idea. The sugar water will attract wasps but it's just going to wash away, and the stink bombs will make it so they just can't stand the smell and won't sit there.

Gas your own block...

giphy.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Pretty sure you're going to need to break those while they're there for maximum effectiveness.

 

Don't know if you can still order but you can amuse yourself with a browse through here: 

http://www.spymall.com/catalog/revenge.htm

 I've always liked their ideas.  I've eyed sonic nausea for a long time.  Sounds a little like something that happpend recently at a Cuban embassy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Kalashnikov said:

I'm inside in the AC with my windows closed livin' good eatin' steak and shrimps, I couldn't care less how it smells out there. Not like it smelled the greatest to begin with anyways.

Meanwhile, outside your window...

 

  • Props 1
  • LOL! 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Liquid Ass

 

Saw a similar post on Reddit - hella people claim this product is legit.

 

Read the reviews.

 

 

Also my first thought is a solar (wireless) motion light that is installed nearby but out of their reach.

 

Usually those partaking in bum type activities like to do ao under the cloak of darkness. A light would irritate the shit out of them.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...
2 hours ago, morton said:

Somebody left behind a bowl and fork on my treelawn.

I gave it 72 hours to be recovered and then threw it in the garbage.

 

 

20181028_141307.jpg

This reminds me of a story from years ago. My cousin had parked his car overnight in a shitty part of town by some railroad tracks. He was going to fuck some broad in that area so it couldn’t be avoided.

 

Next morning, he finds the cars rear window smashed in and braces for the worst. He had a snowboard in the back seat, bunch of expensive snap on tools in the trunk and an ounce of weed in the spare wheel compartment. Absolutely nothing missing... there were cig butts put out on his dashboard and a half eaten bowl of porridge on the passenger seat. So some bum broke in there to smoke some cigs and eat his breakfast then just peaced out.

 

Some people man lol

Edited by Kults
  • Like 1
  • LOL! 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

I'm still here, my bad for not checking in for a little bit. Been busy doing daily boring life shit.

 

So anyways I got a hold of my landlord and told him about this shit. I was like "calling the cops probably won't do a whole lot" (which is true, this is Miami and the laws here are extremely friendly towards homeless people) hoping they'd have some type of better idea. All he said is that I can call him anytime and he'll call the cops. So not much help there. The cops can literally just tell them to leave, and then they'll be back the next night if not even 5 minutes later.

 

There was a cop sitting out there when I got home today though and there have been no bums to be found. The cop left a while ago but the bums are still missing in action, which is cool. I've been doing the stink bomb thing here and there, but some days they're already out there by the time I get home from work so I'm screwed.

  • Like 1
  • Props 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...