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Your best shitty fucked up crap at work stories


ThatDrawingBitch

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My boss liquidated our company in the meeting that was supposed to explain hpw the general phase down would go yesterday. Literally said this is it and apparently left everyone to get on with it (I work remotely). The loyalty people have shown during two years of uncertainty for this dude (small company, seven of us, mainly long term, as in one woman is hitting her sixties and she worked there since 19).

 

Everyone has shitty work stories. Let's hear em.

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worked at a restaurant as a busser back when i was about 19.

 

pretty good gig because there were so many tables & sections and so many servers, and the people that came into the restaurant were usually big tippers and people with money to spend.

 

all the servers had to count out their tips with a manager at the end of the night....and the servers would in turn tip me out, but i wouldnt have to count out....at the end of my shift every single night, i would leave with about $120-$150 cash (untaxed) in tips plus my hourly wage that i would get from my paychecks.

 

one busy night, bartender kept asking me to do what a barback is supposed to do....get ice, help restock bar, etc etc....after doing this for an hour or so, i finally said this isnt my job!...bartender says "your job is what i tell you to do".....almost fought the bartender.....bartender had like 15 years seniority....management sides with bartender....i quit.

 

sucks though, cause i was making good money at the time for a 19 year old.

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Never let emotions get in the way of your employment, unless you can afford to leave.

 

 

true true.

 

but i have a temper, and it gets the best of me at times.

 

after the busser job, i got a job at a supermarket where i worked for over a year...and almost ended up fighting one of my coworkers there...but that was my last week there and i had already put in my 2 week notice so they didnt fire me...they wouldve though...i was cussing him out in front of customers and everything.

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I developed some pretty bad prank habits at my last job. I guess it's what happens when you get bored working a job for so long. I constantly altered people's applications before my boss would read them, or just filled out fake ones to fuck with him. It was just too easy to mess with this guy and the reaction was usually pretty worth it.

 

One customer left a note to one of the girls I worked with regarding something not weird at all, and I extended the note with some straight up creepy shit, leaving a fake phone number and whatever inviting her over. keep in mind it's from a dude who's a regular but nobody likes him much, in his 50's, to a chick who was about 19. My boss sees the note and is furious. Next day the dude comes in and my boss just explodes on him, telling him to get out and to never come back, that he's a fuckin creep and blah blah blah. All for my own sick jollies i guess.

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I do not have the patience or writing skills to really do it justice by my helper is a fucking retard.

 

Things he has a hard time with in no particular order: staying in the truck until it has stopped moving, waiting at the truck, bathing/hygiene, being able to remember or write down the combination to a lock, operating a combination lock, operating a can of spray paint, knowing which end of the hammer to hit with, understanding what the "come over here" hand wave means, finding a box of bolts in another box, using a pocket tape, walking in mud (had such a hard time with that one he just about lost a boot!), not wondering off, repeating basic verbal messages from one person to another, the other day our boss told him to tell me we were starting on Saturday at 6, he translated that somehow to simple "1.6" as in "the boss told me to tell you 1.6", he makes smacking noises with his mouth when he spaces out, squats and makes a face when he farts, smells bad enough to make you gag at close quarters, has invented a "better" way to do what you are instructing him to do before you have even begun to explain it.

 

And that does not even get into the actual work.

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i wokred in restaurants for 7 years, mostly as a cook.

i've got tons of stories.

 

people doing heroin in the walkin fridge, crazy sexual harassment, insane hours, people getting fucked up and drunk every which way at every stage of the shift, people disappearing just to find out they walked out, middle of the shift, to never return.

 

one time i tasted a lasagna my boss had made and i told him it sucked.

we got into a huge fight.

not a very good story but the memory is hilarious.

 

the best prolly, was when i worked at chili's

the place was so fucked, we had dudes on work release that worked there.

meaning, when their shift was over, they got on the bus and went back to prison.

one of these dudes was working the fry station

he and a waiter apparently had gotten into a serious disagreement, but the place was fucking insane when we were busy (10 people on the line, hundreds of thousands of $ in food sold every weekend)

no one noticed them screaming at each other, until the waiter dove through the window (where we put the food up) to try to attack the cook on the line. it was nuts.

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condolences, tdb. from this, youll just get closer to/get to your successful, future self. not like youre giving up, right?

 

cali, can relate. got into arguments with people at work & have told people to fuck off & shit like that.. that much tips in cash at your age at the time, shit.. woulda also just stayed

 

-having some shitty retail job in high school, going all ktarded a bunch of times & somehow getting through the shifts. dontdodat nemor. prob have posted that before, idk

 

-also seen some food/plates fly across kitchens.. got into a fight at work with another dude on the line once, shit was stupid. our dishwasher was also some dude who spoke like five words & just made ass-grabbing motions/kissing sounds at every server coming to drop shit off. some chick working on the line was fired elsewhere for grabbing a dudes dick lol. she had a hairy mole & we called her the lunch lady

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It was all really bad timing as I'm going through some stuff at the moment, but I did get a call from the company ours worked with to see if I wanted to stay on with them, as it turns out my boss sold them all our stock and no one knows what to do with it. What a clusterfuck. Just hoping it comes off and that them approaching me means I will at least get paid the invoice that is in the ether with them at, Stress.

 

Thanks for the stories, they make me feel better xx

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i wokred in restaurants for 7 years, mostly as a cook.

i've got tons of stories.

 

people doing heroin in the walkin fridge, crazy sexual harassment, insane hours, people getting fucked up and drunk every which way at every stage of the shift, people disappearing just to find out they walked out, middle of the shift, to never return.

 

one time i tasted a lasagna my boss had made and i told him it sucked.

we got into a huge fight.

not a very good story but the memory is hilarious.

 

the best prolly, was when i worked at chili's

the place was so fucked, we had dudes on work release that worked there.

meaning, when their shift was over, they got on the bus and went back to prison.

one of these dudes was working the fry station

he and a waiter apparently had gotten into a serious disagreement, but the place was fucking insane when we were busy (10 people on the line, hundreds of thousands of $ in food sold every weekend)

no one noticed them screaming at each other, until the waiter dove through the window (where we put the food up) to try to attack the cook on the line. it was nuts.

 

my ex worked at a chilis in the philly area. she was on her period and tried to take her break to switch tampons and the manager (a dude) was being a little bitch about it until she (rather publicly) said I'M FUCKING BLEEDING AND IT'S RUNNING DOWN MY LEG

 

he didn't fuck with her or her breaks after that

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Damn good luck TDB, on another note there are some funny stories in this thread

 

I worked at a papa johns last winter.

 

They paid us so little we couldn't care less. Our manager was an obese white lady who did nothing. Saw her fall in the kitchen on some pizza dough dust. Homeboy on the line said "she fell on titty at a time"

 

We had a delivery driver get fired for smoking crack on deliveries

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@symbols....anyone ever have sex at the restaurant?

 

oh definitely.

 

there are a few examples i can think of,

but the worst was also at that same chili's

the manager was boning a girl who was a senior in high school.

they used to have 'meetings' once in awhile.

so gross.

 

restaurant staff though, very incestuous as far as front of the house goes.

as a cook, i never got involved in that drama.

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hearing some of these restaurant stories take me back to when i was younger..

worked at a country club that was a venue for weddings, social events, and proms..

It was a big place owned by 3 brothers.. pretty much all privileged assholes and if i think back long enough i can probably think of some better ones but whatever

-one night after clearing out a dining room i was asked to double check everything.. i walked into the room and at the back bar my boss jerked his head up as he inhaled a giant line of coke..

-another night i had to deliver his dinner(same guy) to him in his office and he was getting head from a cocktail waitress he smiled pointed to where i should put the food and then gave me a thumbs up

-the entire staff got down tho. the cook s and dish washers were always hitting on the girls and there were always random hookups and a server or two missing for a bit during the main meal

-during one of the staff holiday parties the coat check girl snuck me into a bridal suite ,we burned and as we were starting to fuck we almost got caught and had to hide out in the bathroom as they were in the room talking about hearing voices and shit.. once they left we finished and got some suspicious looks coming back to join the party.

-i took someones prom date home from work one night

- we would also smoke Ls in the freezer but we got caught by the head chef and he came in acting tough like we were about to get fired and then hit the blunt. that bastard..good times.

 

-took a second job at burger king and lasted two hours before i threw a burger at the manager and left. Unfortunatly thats not what happened but its how i like to think it went down..

 

recently a coworker ripped some asss and then tried to play it off like it was his sneaker

fart smelt like rotten eggs which made it less funny

 

sorry about your job tdb

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I work with special needs children at a highschool. Mostly autistic kids. This EA (educational assistant) was caught getting dome in the supply closet from one of the girls. As if that wasn't bad enough, he gave her hepatitis.

 

 

 

well, that was one of the worst stories i've seen on here.

goddamn people.

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While in high school i worked at this lumber yard because the pay and benefits were really good. I became really good friends with the warehouse manager and one night i went by his office to bullshit and dude is really pissed off about something the store manager did. He asks me to go up to the store and distract this guy because he was gonna get some revenge. I figured what the hell this should be funny so i go to the store and start up a conversation with the store manager eventually its time to close up shop. Im looking around for my warehouse buddy and hes nowhere so im like whatever went home and forgot all about it.

 

The next morning i get a phone call from the owner asking me to come in and answer some questions regarding the store managers car falling through the roof of the store. I started laughing my ass off like what is this some kind of joke. Well apparent my buddy used a bigass forklift to put the managers car up on the store roof. The manager thought his car was stolen and called the cops, filled out a report, and then cabbed it home. Well the roof collapsed under the weight of the car over night and the owner got a call from the cops about a break in and the alarm was set off only to find the store managers car in the middle of the store and about $150k in damage. When i got there around 6am the owner and police where asking me a bunch of questions, but i really didnt know how it went down but i knew it was my friend from the warehouse. I didnt say anything but everyone knew it was him when he never came back to work.

 

I can just imagine the look on his face when he drove past work and saw all the cops and firemen lmao!! He probably floored it all the way to mexico!! I never saw him again but i would love to find out why he was mad at the store manager and what he's been upto all these years

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