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EvanWilliams

Bonnaroo 13!!

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My advice is don't go.

The lineup is absolute shit, the tickets are far to expensive, the venue sucks, the cops/feds are all over the place, you will get custied the fuck out if you fail to bring your own supplies, who knows what kind of stds you will get from banging any of the whores there, they don't service the port-a-potties, I've watched a group of wasted dude brahs tip over a group of port-a-potties with people in them and run off, security sucks, no fucking shade & it's really fucking hot the whole time you are there, and about 50 other reasons I'm just to lazy to type right now.

 

Of course I doubt you are going to listen to my advice and not go so here are a few pieces of advice if you do go.

Obey the fucking speed limit driving into to that place and make sure your car is clean/everything is so well stashed 30 cops and a few dogs can't find it. Expect when you get pulled over for doing something stupid for them to rip apart your car and have 30 cops and a few dogs.

Don't bother buying your tickets in advance, just roll up to the walmart parking lot on wednesday and hang out. Eventually someone will roll through and sell you staff/vip/whatever wristbands for a really good deal. Also staff wristbands = free showers

That shady lot kid is probably has no idea what the fuck he is selling you, sure it could be what you are looking for but it could also be some random research chemical or bath salts if its even real.

Don't expect anything you buy there to be a good deal, a lot of people go to this festival solely to make money off people like you.

Wrap that shit up you got no idea where that nasty bisco whore who has been sniffing all your drugs you want to bang has been. Actually just don't even do it, go beat off in your tent instead. Trust me once you see pictures of that chick your drug addled brain thought was cute you will thank me.

Show up early and leave late. Otherwise traffic is going to be hell.

Bring nose plugs, consider if you really want to be smelling 100k+ unwashed sweaty people doing drugs and having sex in tents with port-a-potties that don't get cleaned?

 

Seriously man don't do it this festival sucks and you are far better off going to a different festival. I could recommend a few for you if you want.

Also just as a little side note I might possibly be going to bonnaroo this year if they are willing to pay me enough money to work for them. Of course I would be working before the festival only and probably would leave and sell my laminate to some stupid kid on my way out.

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Have you been?

I haven't been in years and unless they are paying me ridiculous amounts of cash this year I have no intention of going. Maybe things have changed but I doubt it and everything I said there is true so yes it is that terrible and yes people still go.

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How good can anything like this be after 13 years? It's a cash cow, it's not about the audience having an enjoyable experience.

 

Illuminati is right....there are better festivals out there, you might not get to see all of the bands you want in one convenient package a la Bonnaroo but the promoters actually care about little things like safety and sanitation.

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Yeah, but Illiminati, tell us how you really feel.

 

It is important to remember that the consciousness-expansion is the reverse of the birth process, the ego-loss experiencee being a temporary ending of game life, a passing from one state of consciousness into another. Just as an infant must wake up and learn from experience the nature of this world, so a person must wake up in this new brilliant world of consciousness expansion and become familiar with its own peculiar conditions.

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I got invited to paint at the one in 2009. At the time I lived about 40 minutes away so it was reasonable. We each got two free tickets and breakfast/lunch/dinner while we were there painting. And about 20 cans of Ironlak for each person painting was pretty nice. Half my crew ended up bailing and I got their paint. Then Abys went and took like five cans and painted a burner. I couldn't even hate on it cause the piece was too good. And he gave me some acid afterwards so... fair trade I guess. I gave my ticket to some girl and we camped out together. I would not recommend it unless you got free tickets. But I don't like crowds or anything loud so I suppose it wasn't for me anyway. I left a day or two early.

 

Highlights:

 

I saw a guy try to get into a show, they searched his bag and pulled out a pistol, which prompted him to run/stumble/faceplant-in-mud/get caught.

 

I tried to sneak a bike in and got caught.

 

Knocked out a "bro" who was yelling "bonnarroooooooooo" over and over in my friend's face.

 

Tried "molly", didn't work at all.

 

The good portos are in the wayyyyy back of the field.

 

You can sneak in really easily.

 

I declined some DMT and wished I hadn't.

 

There is always a juggalo tent somewhere to cheer you up if you get down.

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There is always a juggalo tent somewhere to cheer you up if you get down.

 

You just made me not want to work them even if they pay me lots of money.

I went twice when they first started. Paid for neither and after the second one decided I never wanted to go back no matter how much money I could make. Am rethinking that due to a friend working for them and him wanting me to come work for him.

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My now defunct band used to play at some regional festivals (festies to the natives, phesties if you're really an asshole). I always hated them, the last one we played was all good (hood) a few years back, which is a fairly big event full of irritating people. No doubt there were some cool people there but I'd say well more than half were at best cliche, mindless, annoying hippies and at worst shady, tough-guy, redneck hippies with no morals whatsoever. The irony is pretty spectacular. Pretty much all the bands are fucking horrible, everyone would come out like "you guys like WEED?", and everyone would scream like complete retards. I couldn't drink enough/do enough drugs/funnel cakes to remotely have a good time. At least Bonnaroo has some decent bands, and less hippies. I still would take a club/medium sized venue show over that clusterfuck any day.

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Mao I am so sorry you had to go to all hood I can understand your irritation at that event. That is actually one of the few festivals I would recommend bonnaroo over.

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Haha, I might have had more fun if I were 20 and actually liked that sort of music. I did have some fun at a few camp sights, but inside the gates just wasn't my thing. Some smaller festivals I've liked more but they still just weren't for me. From what I've heard all good used to be a better festival, we played there after it was sort of going downhill I've heard. I'm sure the crowd at Bonnaroo, even if only through sheer size is more annoying.

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My advice is don't go.

The lineup is absolute shit, the tickets are far to expensive, the venue sucks, the cops/feds are all over the place, you will get custied the fuck out if you fail to bring your own supplies, who knows what kind of stds you will get from banging any of the whores there, they don't service the port-a-potties, I've watched a group of wasted dude brahs tip over a group of port-a-potties with people in them and run off, security sucks, no fucking shade & it's really fucking hot the whole time you are there, and about 50 other reasons I'm just to lazy to type right now.

 

Of course I doubt you are going to listen to my advice and not go so here are a few pieces of advice if you do go.

Obey the fucking speed limit driving into to that place and make sure your car is clean/everything is so well stashed 30 cops and a few dogs can't find it. Expect when you get pulled over for doing something stupid for them to rip apart your car and have 30 cops and a few dogs.

Don't bother buying your tickets in advance, just roll up to the walmart parking lot on wednesday and hang out. Eventually someone will roll through and sell you staff/vip/whatever wristbands for a really good deal. Also staff wristbands = free showers

That shady lot kid is probably has no idea what the fuck he is selling you, sure it could be what you are looking for but it could also be some random research chemical or bath salts if its even real.

Don't expect anything you buy there to be a good deal, a lot of people go to this festival solely to make money off people like you.

Wrap that shit up you got no idea where that nasty bisco whore who has been sniffing all your drugs you want to bang has been. Actually just don't even do it, go beat off in your tent instead. Trust me once you see pictures of that chick your drug addled brain thought was cute you will thank me.

Show up early and leave late. Otherwise traffic is going to be hell.

Bring nose plugs, consider if you really want to be smelling 100k+ unwashed sweaty people doing drugs and having sex in tents with port-a-potties that don't get cleaned?

 

Seriously man don't do it this festival sucks and you are far better off going to a different festival. I could recommend a few for you if you want.

Also just as a little side note I might possibly be going to bonnaroo this year if they are willing to pay me enough money to work for them. Of course I would be working before the festival only and probably would leave and sell my laminate to some stupid kid on my way out.

haha wow.. so thats pretty much a fantasy of mine since hs crushed. not really a fantasy & nor exactly crushed, but an on & off idea highly discouraged.. old friends & i at the time talked about it a few times but now idk if i even wanna go after reading that. the futuristic rv with everything included + moat is basically just an unaffordable fantasy but that was pretty much the only way i wanted to go. or just sleep in a car & not talk to people

 

whatevers though, no rush for this

 

as for bonnaroo - boo

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haha wow.. so thats pretty much a fantasy of mine since hs crushed. not really a fantasy & nor exactly crushed, but an on & off idea highly discouraged.. old friends & i at the time talked about it a few times but now idk if i even wanna go after reading that. the futuristic rv with everything included + moat is basically just an unaffordable fantasy but that was pretty much the only way i wanted to go. or just sleep in a car & not talk to people

 

whatevers though, no rush for this

 

as for bonnaroo - boo

 

Not quite sure what you are talking about here but I did read futuristic RV & moat. These two things make me think you want to go to burning man not bonnaroo. Not sure how you would put a moat around your camp but it would be fucking awesome.

 

Also can I reccomend one of these over bonnaroo for a festival

http://summercampfestival.com/lineup/

http://www.wakarusa.com/artist-lineup/

 

both are big festivals and will give you essentially the same experience as bonnaroo without having to deal with the shit from bonnaroo.

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Not quite sure what you are talking about here but I did read futuristic RV & moat.

MC was just describing his preparations for attending the Gathering of the Juggalos this year.

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