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Taking a Dump in public


vanfullofretards

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Due to my job, sometimes I have to piss/shit whenever I get a chance, regardless of location.

 

Also due to my job, viewing drug test happens daily.

 

I have found that the more comfortable you are with yourself, the easier it is to do bodily things in front of other people.

 

I could not give a shit if someone was watching me take that shit.

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Never have I ever.

 

Except once in the main train transhit (actually a typo, which I just noticed and will not be correcting) hub in Milan. A truly dire shituation (I made that one on purpose).

 

I tend to be a weirdo about public restrooms in general.

 

As far as Cil's point, though I am comfortable with myself I do not think I would ever shit directly in front of someone else. The drunk pisspuke is common enough, but beyond that, nope.

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about a few weeks to a month ago, i was leaving my friends by walking through this bigass empty parking lot thats been put out of service. i had eaten nothing all day except one huge meal with soup, chicken, etc before leaving his place. about 4/5ths of the way through said parking lot, i had the worst pre-shart pains & a badly churning stomach in general... it couldnt wait. i made sure nobody was around, then took off my nice pants & boxers to make sure they wouldnt get any accidental velocity/running stains in the process.. then let it rip. it was one of the runs ive ever dealt with; loud farts as shit came splattering out at every possible angle, almost exactly like in the WOW episode of south park where cartmans mom caught his diarrhea. as i threw away the second sock after making sure i was stain-free, still squatting - it started raining hard. i took a flick of this inconvenient, eventful shit. ill post it later tonight in the pies thread - been meaning to drop one for a while, but been lazy

 

then last night, i had to shit real badly all of a sudden... didnt have time to find an aids-infested toilet downtown; it was either shit myself on the spot & go home from there, or hop a fence & shit in a clean, private alley. lost a boxer

 

i swear these things dont happen as often as ive just made them seem... im a clean freak with most things, especially when it comes to excrement. if i take a shit at home, i clean off with a nice quick lower-body shower

 

as for public toilets? i wont even go near that shit in certain places (coffee time, gas stations, etc)... only would shit in the cleanest ones i can find & still use half a tree to make sure no contact is made, & that the water is parachuted so i dont get aids splashing on my corn hole.... public toilets are basically for only if the urgency of the shit is in moderation between having to shit myself on the spot, or being able to wait a little until i get home & drop deuces in comfort

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I've ranted about this many times before, mainly how work poopers are seriously fucking disgusting.

 

I work in office buildings around executives, and it seems the more $ they make, the nastier they are. The kind of guys who have no shame showing their face after they just repeatedly stepped on a duck. fuck them. I hate having to smell their shit. I expect it from you blue collar types who are paid by the hour, but you're still fucking scum too.

 

It has forced me over the past decade to seek out (out of the way) empty washrooms just so I can piss without feeling like I'm sucking on someones sphincter.

 

My office washrooms are bombed by 7:30am when the building is still empty, it's like people come here to shit on purpose. I see people who have routines, doing it 3 times a day, on a strict schedule like a Swiss train. I guess they get no peace at home?

 

If you're that dialed into you regularity, shift your internal clock to right when you wake up, and right before you go to bed.

 

george_costanza.jpg

I public poop maybe once a year, in dire dumb & dumber circumstances... but even then I try to Costanza it and poop in marble-lined shitters.

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Worst bathroom I've ever taken a shit in was the Hemlock in SF. No door to close, just some half ass

curtain between the shitter and the urinal, graffiti 2 inches thick on all surfaces and hipsters trying to hide

their cocaine use on the other side of the curtain, pussies. Anyway, shitting in public is no problem, I'd

always rather have home field advantage, but when you gotta go ya gotta go.

 

Also, I think it was said earlier, if you've ever been in jail for any amount of time-it shouldn't be a problem.

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i'm with cilone,

 

due to job its not an option. try taking a dump in an mre bag doing 45 down afghani highways while squatting inside a stryker, hoping your driver doesn't have to hit the brakes or that you don't hit an ied...

 

i used to not, til i was 21. then i got some food poisoning and didn't want to shit my pants at school. so i gave in, haven't looked back. i will shit anywhere. i fear no toilet.

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man up and

go for broke

 

i don't get the big deal. wipe be clean or just gruesome

dropped a biggie after a hungover burger king breakfast while painting an abandoned building, few hours after some kid stepped back from doing his piece and planted the air max firmly in it.

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Human shit and graffiti is a heady mix.

 

when i'm winter painting and there's still leftover snow on the ground

 

i love to take a break from painting and shit in that snow

 

then cover said shit in the snow, with some more (clean) snow

 

don't worry about it

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

but yeah i don't like it, but i have to shit in public restrooms like every day

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VFOR, I'm guessing you either never went to jail before or else you held your shit like you were George Costanza going to India. As I've said before, it's always better to play on home court then having to play an away game. That being said, I do enjoy taking a shit outdoors if no one is around, but will be to find it later. Left one on home plate before. Notice how a turd taken outside the bowl doesn't hold it's shape as much?

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