Jump to content
Search In
  • More options...
Find results that contain...
Find results in...
vanfullofretards

What would you want in your dream house?

Recommended Posts

I'd want a dumb waiter,

urinal

and an indoor pool, with a pool around the other pool, so it's like two pools in one.

And i'd want a butler to greet me at the door and take my coat.

 

 

I think this is a great thread idea.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Why not cut a hole in the floor? There's water underneath the boat.

 

I would like a storefront with a garden and workshop. Everything else would fall into place after that.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Let me make a serious contribution instead of making stupid remarks.

 

I'd build a rape tunnel that led towards the kitchen, thus serving a dual purpose for all female guests.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

A giant panda in a glass cage for my viewing pleasure,

Alexander Skarsgård in a loin cloth at my beck and call,

12' by 12' bed with enough throw pillows to smother a large bear(bitches love throw pillows),

a large bear,

a room where the whole floor was one giant trampoline,

the largest private collection of first editions known to man in the most ridiculously opulent library known to man,

a kitchen only used to bake cakes, separate from the regular kitchen which would house Marco Pierre White who would have tantrums on demand,

a collection of tiny things,

a stool from the set of 'Cheers',

a life sized mannequin of Ryan Gosling dressed as a penguin,

a ride on vacuum cleaner,

kittens(bitches love kittens),

puppies(bitches love puppies),

babies(bitches love babies),

the worlds largest tea cup,

a carpet maid from Nicholas Cages' body hair,

a fog machine,

Pavement playing 'grounded' over and over and over and over,

the entrance to hell,

a room where the walls are made of glass panels that are filled with luminous green goop

Gene Wilder's corpse,

a dog sized horse and a horse sized dog

a while in the swimming pool,

a whale dog,

16 nuns crocheting tea cosies,

a lamp shaped like Alfred Hitchcock's head,

a full sized theatre screening room with Steve Guttenberg as an usher

a room filled with vending machines filled with coke and Hershey's

two cross dressing midgets dressed as Dolly Parton and Cher,

an original umpa lumpa

bronze busts of all the characters from the Star Wars Trilogy(the prequels),

and last but by no means least a dinner table that sits 260 people made entirely of monkey bones.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

• my dream house would be a penthouse, top floor, too high for traffic noise, fuck a house in the burbs or countryside

 

• it would have window that overlooked a dope city and to be walking distance to hundreds of dope restaurants

 

• It would have a few paintings and photos made by people I actually like

 

• it would be laced with products designed by apple my iphone would function as a remote to control them all

 

• it would be full of rad art, photography, and design books

 

• A stereo that sounded good and a TV that didn't pick up actual TV channels, movies only, fuck TV

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

4 Virgin hoez of varying ethnicities and educational backgrounds.

 

You know, smart hoez. Doctors and philosophers and shit.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
A giant panda in a glass cage for my viewing pleasure,

Alexander Skarsgård in a loin cloth at my beck and call,

12' by 12' bed with enough throw pillows to smother a large bear(bitches love throw pillows),

a large bear,

a room where the whole floor was one giant trampoline,

the largest private collection of first editions known to man in the most ridiculously opulent library known to man,

a kitchen only used to bake cakes, separate from the regular kitchen which would house Marco Pierre White who would have tantrums on demand,

a collection of tiny things,

a stool from the set of 'Cheers',

a life sized mannequin of Ryan Gosling dressed as a penguin,

a ride on vacuum cleaner,

kittens(bitches love kittens),

puppies(bitches love puppies),

babies(bitches love babies),

the worlds largest tea cup,

a carpet maid from Nicholas Cages' body hair,

a fog machine,

Pavement playing 'grounded' over and over and over and over,

the entrance to hell,

a room where the walls are made of glass panels that are filled with luminous green goop

Gene Wilder's corpse,

a dog sized horse and a horse sized dog

a while in the swimming pool,

a whale dog,

16 nuns crocheting tea cosies,

a lamp shaped like Alfred Hitchcock's head,

a full sized theatre screening room with Steve Guttenberg as an usher

a room filled with vending machines filled with coke and Hershey's

two cross dressing midgets dressed as Dolly Parton and Cher,

an original umpa lumpa

bronze busts of all the characters from the Star Wars Trilogy(the prequels),

and last but by no means least a dinner table that sits 260 people made entirely of monkey bones.

pimp-princejpg-4d9e2e96c62df79f_large.jpg

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

view, walk around balcony. hot tub and built in grill/fridge/sink, out door shower, pool.

nothing fancy.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

- One of those couches that goes around the walls. I want one that goes around 3 walls and also sticks out into the middle of the room.

- Art supplies

- covered hopper rail siding in the backyard.

- skylights, lots of them

- a dog

- legos, a shitton of them

- shag carpeting upstairs.

- a menorah, i'm not jewish, but they're cool

- big old dining room table

- giant room for toy train layout

- 3 housemates who don't suck and like to cook and do shit i like too.

- a ginger wife with a fat ass. the reformed slut type.

- A robot that keeps me from doing and saying stupid things.

- an override button for that robot

- fire pole to get downstairs in a hurry

- a lofted bed

- a wet bar

- 3-d printer

- photo printer

- poster printer

- a urinal, yes.

- a cooler full of freeze pops

- icee machine

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Register for a 12ozProphet forum account or sign in to comment

You need to be a forum member in order to comment. Forum accounts are separate from shop accounts.

Create an account

Register to become a 12ozProphet forum member.

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×