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Constipated as hell, chugging black pony penis water like I'm Mad Max.


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Re: Constipated as hell, chugging black people like a mad man.

 

any hot fluid in large amounts as soon as you wake up seems to work

i tried just drinking hot water instead of coffee when i woke up

still worked

i like to get my shitting out of the way first thing in the morning, feel lighter on my feet for the rest of the day

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Re: Constipated as hell, chugging black people like a mad man.

 

That's a lot of shit for a baby. Suspicious.

 

I'm gonna go ahead and assume his father got wasted and shit all over the room, planting his infant son as evidence.

 

That's what I'd do anyway, not that I plan on having children.

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Re: Constipated as hell, chugging black people like a mad man.

 

This^

 

Also try drinking 1tbsp of chia seeds in about 8 oz of water.

go to your local health food store and buy some probiotics, 50billion+ culture

stop taking opiates/suboxone/methadone, etc.

 

 

all that plus try a fiber supplement (one you stir the powder into a glass of water or whatever) and avoid dairy and gluten.

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Re: Constipated as hell, chugging black pony penis water like a mad man.

 

The night I drank the coconut milk I shat a bunch of times thru the night. 4am, 7am, 9am etc

 

But when I woke up yesterday I didn't have complete relief. I felt much better tho.

 

Today I am in the worst agony yet. Hard to piss and fart. My abdomen is swollen making me look like 10 lbs heavier. Head ache, fever, zero appetite. Even a lil kidney pain which is very worrysome...I'm sore from laying around because it's so painful to do anything else.

 

Drank about a half (small) bottle of milk of magnesia this morning and afternoon. Been some 'relief' but not enough to sway the discomfort.

 

Unless all hell breaks loose on the shitter tonight, going to urgent care tomorrow night.

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Re: Constipated as hell, chugging black pony penis water like a mad man.

 

I dunno if this has been mentioned, but there's a diet pill that blocks the body from absorbing oil an grease from fatty foods, so when you take a crap it looks like the Exxon Valdez oil spill. And since you're just passing thru the grease, if you fart, chances are you're going to shit yourself.

 

I forgot the name of these pills.

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The milk of magnesia helped very little. I took a sick day yesterday and took a double dose of ex lax pills. Waited the 6-12 hours for them to kick in and nothing happened.

 

Woke up this morning feeling pretty gold and even went to work planning on making a dr Appt when I got off.

 

Then I shit some clear oily stuff at work(scary as fuck).... Googled it and it's mucus. Seems their may be a blockage which could explain the laxatives being ineffective. I left work after that and now I'm waiting for my Dr Appt I just made which is in an hour.

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after my accident they gave me so much dope that i didnt shit for like 4 days, i was so worried i bought an enema but never used it, the only thing that worked was COD LIVER OIL. it tastes as gross as it sounds, tastes like the oil that comes from the liver of a cod. it worked within a couple hours, if you really want to get rid of your constipation than take some.

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