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quit my job today

blood fart

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I didn't do anything super outrageous or rude, or tell anyone to eat shit.

Well, besides my immediate bossman...but I tell that old fart to eat shit most erry day.


Did the decent thing and put in my two weeks.

It gave them two weeks to plan a super fucking awesome surprise BBQ party for me.

Which actually wasn't much of a surprise, because it is impossible for people to keep secrets from me.

But it was still super nice and made me feel appreciated.


Our time in Germany has come to an end and we're heading back to Austin on Friday.

I'm pretty stoked on seeing my niece and buddies back home, but I'm really gonna miss this place and all the awesome folks I've had the pleasure of meeting.


Either way, today was my last day at work...and it's a damn good feeling.


I've always been told that I'm a very likable person and people enjoy my company, but today it really set in how highly people think of me.

Most people that leave/quit barely get a card.

For me, they had a massive 4-hour-long BBQ and I got a few cards and a number of gifts.

A few people actually cried and I gave out about five hundred hugs today.


Standing in the sun, eating burgers, cracking jokes on my boss and getting paid for it.

Can't really ask for much more for a final day on a job.

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I couldn't get fired from that job if I tried..and I did.


Came in late erry day for a two-three month stretch.

Left early whenever I wanted to.

Never called in to say I couldn't make it, just didn't show up.

Took long, frequent breaks.

Would call my boss out on being a crusty old perv on the daily.

Showed up weeded out of my skull most every day.


I never once got into trouble, got counseled, or written up.

I could do no wrong in the eyes of my bosses

I guess they knew that I always got my work done and done properly, so they didn't hassle me about small shit.


I play by my own rules and make em up as I go along.



My job was just a job, nothing to take serious or invest years into.

Just something to kill time and make a few extra bucks for vacations and tattoos.

But it's nice to be free.



I have one more day in Germany.

Then I start with the job search back in Austin.

Ain't nothing to worry about...people love to hire me.






And all the lame gifs ain't gonna do a damn thing to change my good mood.

You can keep sucking at ruling and I'll keep being really awesome at life.

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goonfish, you are fucking banned.

aaahhhh and deleted posts. that felt good huh?



congrats bloody farticles.


that bittersweet feeling is so hard to describe. i haven't had it often but when i left my job of 5 years awhile back it was definitely like that

people didn't go as ape shit for me but i did feel appreciated and it was great


that's cool you got to live overseas. one of these days i'll do it.

safe journey home..or back to the states, however you see it

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At least you have the employ-ability chip going for you, i'm generally bad tempered, laugh at inappropriate things, and have no volume control whatsoever, so i'm only generally suited for politics, and being a garbageman, and there ain't no garbage jobs round` hurrrr.


Oh, and if you happen to stumble across a homeless/trainhopper/whatever kid named casey in austin with a blondeish dog, kick casey in the stomach, give the dog a kiss, and ask him WHO IS MIKE JONES.


oh, and if you want to see a dog do a backflip, yell HAMBURRRRRGERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.


everyone somehow meets casey....




OH, and your methods backfired on me, too. I used to work for the state...by the end, i was smoking an entire blunt a day on my breaks, i'd wear only one 'dress' shirt (a mesh, collared shirt with some obscene metal t-shirt under it), and cargo khaki pants with boot-ish skate shoes, just barely squeaking by the dress code. I miss working for the state.....as much as i hated that job, and made an effort to be a grumpy asshole, i somehow was still one of the most productive workers there. goes to show you how ineffective state governments are.

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I'm just ready to get the moving thing over with.

The last two months was just preparing and packing and shipping and all that.

It seemed like it would never end.

And I guess it really hasn't.

I'm sitting in a tiny hotel room across the parking lot from my old job.

With my cats.

The tiny one is being a jerk and howling.

She got a botched German spay job.

Erry few months she thinks she can make kittens with everything.

Horrible howling all day and night

she sounds so ugly and it makes me almost hate her.


It's real exciting to think this weekend I will be riding bikes around Austin.

Looking for a nice place to live.


I've been sad a bit, feeling as if I didn't do enough with my time in Europe.

but I did what I could.

I guess.

I could be outside walking through the woods.

and maybe I just might do that.


Moving back home should be easy.

coming back here should be pretty easy, as well.

I have a lot of vacations in the states planned.

Gonna take my little buddy to The Grand Canyon..

Summer road trip with camping and hiking to swimming holes.

Every meal a picnic in a park.

bonding over awesome things.

making jokes and making memories.


I have some ideas on jobs I might like to do.

nothing I'm real set on.

I kind of know what area of town I'd like to live in.

I'll figure it all out in time.

it shouldn't be too hard.

anything, ever.

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Coming back stateside after a long stint in Europe is always a trip, you never look at people and places the same. Sometimes I wish I never came home.


i opted for 'suicide by boss', called her a cunt, and still collected unemployment.


I did the same thing in January by accident.

The night before I was gonna quit, I was at a company happy hour for new hires. I had been drinking all day and kinda blacked out the evening.

Apparently I was talking mad shit about the company to the new hires and a guy from HR over heard me.


I was "asked to leave" the next day by HR, no reason why other than it was obvious I wasn't happy and didn't want to be there.


I got about 6 weeks pay in severance, bonus and unused PTO. (I had also just taken 2.5 weeks off during the holidays to burn PTO hours)

It turned out for the better since me getting fired dropped all non-compete legality with the companies I wanted to go work for.


I took 5 weeks off to do nothing, then started my new/better job with a 33% raise.




I forgot to collect unemployment

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No more stacking farm animals?


I'm real great at stacking things, so I can always fall back on that as a skill that will land me any stacking job.


I've been leaning toward the idea of going to school part time and conning people into buying things that I make for some pocket money.

Either get some sort of certificate to work with special needs kids, or to be a personal trainer.


I try not to stress about life and things in general.

If you have a good attitude and treat people right, good things usually happen.


Everything that I do, I am mediocre-to-totally-fucking-amazing at.

The old jerk of all trades, master of none deal.

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I think being a real estate appraiser would be pretty dope.

If you like cooking/fitness (personal trainer) maybe look into becoming a dietician? They do pretty well...


If I could change careers I would want to be a park ranger or fish and game warden... Cruising around in the wilderness all day talking to people who are in a good mood. Can't go wrong. Plus they're govt jobs...

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I tend to not bother myself with the majority of threads started around here.


I just got caught up on that porn star on board thing.

I guess it's entertainment to some, not so much to me.

Who knows, maybe she has a winning personality and quick wit...I wouldn't wager any money on it, though.

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