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shameful/awesome sex story souperthread.


DSD666

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My last girl was getting horny while i was sat up in bed watchin tv, drinking Caffery's (Irish Ale) in a hotel in London, now what i didn't know was that Caffery's is what her Dad supped every night back home, the horny bitch climbed on and started kissing me, then looked at me drooling and said 'ooh you taste just like my dad'.

 

i laughed hard at her for a few minutes while she tried to backtrack saying 'i meant you taste like the smell of Caffery's'

 

we broke up soon after..

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  • 2 months later...

I go to a shindig last night at my brother's place. His roommate is Italian and her two friends are visiting from Italy. One of her friends (a chubstah) had been bothering me every time I saw her, I usually brushed her off. I had invited a number of more respectable girls and was chatting them up during the party, while the chubstah was bothering me all night. I kinda played along with her but still keeping my distance. 4am rolls around and I'm fairly drunk, the other girls I was talking with had to get up early so I make the decision to leave while everyone else is blowing lines in the bedroom. I go into the hallway to leave and lo and behold the girl comes out to follow me. I figure, fuck it, I sit down next to her on the stairs. Her English is really bad, but somehow she explains that she is leaving the next day and won't ever see me again. I put her hand on my cock and she starts to rub accordingly (my way of convincing myself it would be worthwhile.) I take her a floor up in the hallway she drops down to her knees and I whip it out, and sweet jeebus did she take it like a champ. I haven't had a blowjob like this in fucking years, she thoroughly enjoyed taking my penis as far as she could down her throat. I'm trying my best to cum so I wouldn't have to fuck her, but of course she stops right before and starts with the coquettish rhetoric (but again her English is really bad) "I no like you" and "You are fucking bastard." It was really hard not to laugh, although I'm fairly sure it wouldn't have stopped her from getting banged out. So I grab her fat vagina and rub it, tell her I want to fuck her but not without a condom. She agrees and goes STOMPING down the stairs and starts knocking the door loud as fuck yelling for her friend to open the door. One of my friends open the door and she starts yelling at them asking where her friend is. She comes back up to the 2nd floor hallway and I get some more head and put on the condom and go at it on the hardwood floor (luckily she was ample cushioning, but it still hurt my knees.) People are walking in and out of the door downstairs and I keep thinking what a peculiar sight it would be for someone to walk in on this. The girl then tells me "I want you bite me." Not really into it but I do it any way. Nothing too weird or aggressive (as if this whole ordeal wasn't weird enough), but I can imagine what she does normally with whatever other dude she's fucking on a regular basis. BIZARRE. The combination of the hardwood floor, alcohol and drugs and weird sexual shit this girl was asking me to do was making it hard for me to finish, but I was determined. The girl says "Why you no want kiss me?" I just say "NO" as sternly as possible, but again this whole situation was just hard not to laugh at. I finished, walk downstairs to see my friend open the door and peek out and laugh at me, and I set on my merry way. I really want a cigarette and there is a bodega close to where my brother stays that sells them for cheap ($7). I ride my bike over there, buy some camels, order a bodegawich and get a liter of club soda and a bar of soap. While the mexican guy is cooking my sandwich I go outside around the corner and find a spot in between some cars and drop my pants. I was still wearing the condom, mind you, which I threw off and proceeded to wash my penis with dove and club soda (for whatever reason I thought that club soda would be a better cleaning agent for my makeshift penis shower. again, alcohol and drugs got the best of me this night.) I did have a somewhat revelating third person perspective of me, in a shitty part of brooklyn with my pants at my ankles washing my weiner, to which I smoked a cigarette and smiled.

 

ATE THE BODEGAWICH AND TOOK THE SUBWAY HOME

 

Cliffs notes: Banged out a fat Italian girl in a hallway, she makes me bite her, I go order a bodega-sandwich and wash myself with club soda and soap inbetween some cars on the street.

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Been a minute since I posted in here, so ill drop a few.

 

 

 

One of these girls was an asian girl whom I had been fucking for a while, it was a pretty sweet gig as all id have to do is call/text and she would drive to me to come get the dick. It was cool becuse she was down for basically whatever, shed just blow and go, shed take it in her ass, she liked facials, and she was also down for anything including on occasion me taking her to an abandonded house and smashing her on a mattress we moved in there.

 

 

LOL WUT?:lol: :lol: :lol:

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The only stories I can think of right now happened a couple years ago...I was smashin this sexy spanish broad I met in school. I lived in dorms at the time and my roomate came home and proceded to smash his broad in the room. So i take her to my car in the parking lot and its parked right next to the basketball courts (like 10 ft. away) She said she was down so i start smashin and I look over and all the nurgas on the court are looking but trying to act like they aint. When I finish we get out and I throw the rubber near the court and they start laughin and she got all embarrassed (I guess that was a dick move now that I think about it.) Then my homie spotted us gettin out the whip and started puttin us on blast and she got even more embarrassed. We smashed a couple more times after that...

 

Girl from story...

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most of the stuff i have read here is either bullshit or thinly veiled brags...

I have plently of shameful stories. One stands out for me.

 

One night went to a party and didn't know many people. this big ugly bitch was hanging around me like a fly on shit. I ended up getting pretty drunk pretty quick and wanted to leave, so i accepted a lift home from this girl. I can't say i didn't know exactly what was going to happen. Didn't want to take her to my place, so i took her to one of my mates garage. She started gave me head i couldnt even stay hard. Went to fuck after a bit with my limp dick. She had a filthy smelling cunt and i went there anyway. Afterwards i went outside and vomited. I sent her on her way and walked home.. I just remember showering 4, 5 times, and feeling like I would never get the smell of her off me.. I felt so ashamed of myself. She told her friends too, and it got back to some of my friends . I denied it of course. Saw her years later.. made me gag....

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I went to a party with some of my homies and I chick I was smashin at the time. The chick I was smashin had a boyfriend but he was in a different country at the time. The whole night shit was all good, had a good time. When we get back to our dorms she goes to her room and I go to mine. I was blackout drunk at this time...I went to her room to get some pussy and one of my friends was there haha. So I just look stupid having to walk back to my room without gettin some...anyway a couple weeks later my homie and her are in love, her bf comes back from the other country and they get into a fight over her which was hilarious

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LOL WUT?:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

Hahah yeah dude, back in High shcool mama dukes would get off early somedays so if I wanted some Chinease after hours id have to look elsewhere.

 

I had a bunch of outdoors spots and places that were straight for car sex but sometimes this girl would complain the car was too cramped so I had to look elsewhere.

 

There was this abandonded house not far from my buddies house not far from the road but was blocked by overgrowth and I swear the inside was like someone still lived in it(never ran into anyone) so I remembered hanging in there bakc in the day as kids so I thought why not use it.

 

Now dont get me wrong, a vacant house is grimey enough but im not smashing on a dirty and probably haunted mattress. So one day I managed to sneak my own jank into a room in there and on a few occasions, less than 5 id take shorty in there and beat cheeks.

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  • 4 months later...

Ill put a few more stories up in here in a minute

 

Better yet though I was talking to a girl the other day that gave me head back in high school,

I forget how we got back in touch but we got to naughty talking and im all for nasty shit but ive never had someone blow my mind...

 

But this bitch(after beating it out of her) admitted to me she was into beastiality, had been hooking up with her dog on and off and proceded to tell me about some website she joined up on that hooks people up with animals...

 

I couldnt make that shit up if I was high and drunk.

Regardless she is now on my shit list, that bitch wont be blowing me, or my German Shepard.

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I dont have a facebook, so youve got to be counting on the chick.

 

Would you guys rather hear one about a whore or a cougar?

and why the fuck am I the only one telling my shit?

 

I know you people dont get laid much, but something happened back in high school atleast.

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I was admittedly just being clever with that.

 

However, there was an incident of taking a girl out for a nice dinner and inadvertently cumming in her hair a couple hours later.

 

She had never done anything sexual before.

 

Nothing really shameful/awesome about that one, but it still brings a cruel smirk to my face now and then.

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I don't have any 'awesome' sex stories, so I thought I'd contribute with one, even if it didn't happen.

 

 

 

Ha ha, yeeeaah. I'ma part time pornstar minus the film crew, feel me. so anyways, bro. i was at high school, musta been summertime... an thiz latina hoe be lookin in my direction, the homie has dated her for like two weeks and my boy ain't no playboy, ya hurd. So i told homie to bounce off to the cafeteria an i proceeded to smile and flick my eyebrows up in this bitch's direcion, she squeezed her book tightly and giggled then swayed side to side, but i noticed this motherfuckin sluthoe was rubbing her clit, an do you know what homegirl said to me? She said ''ohhhhh, uurrrrooohhh.... do you like my handstyle, baby?'' i said ''it's aight, yo. is that sex krink comin outta your holeo?'' but it was at this moment when my homie came back from the cafeteria, you shoulda seen his face, man. Oh... me an my buddy go back years, he battled depression and his self-esteem is lower than a legless midget doing a limbo dance, yo. So anyway, brah, i had lipstick on my face... not from kissin the clit-rubbin bish, nah son... I jus like puttin it on my face.

 

Yeah, so as I was sayin, my homie just look at me with a dropped-jaw expression, you could hear my niggas books drop on the floor, I mean, word up, it coulda literally gone down like 'bomp' but nah, son, more like 'twwwash' cuz it landed in a puddle and the water juss sprayed all over his pants. Ha ha, that was some funny shit, man. He said 'Cope3... how could you?! After all these years of being my bestest buddy in the whollllleeee wide worllld you go an do this to me' so I leant to the side due to my view being blocked cuz the bitch was furiously riding on my dick (aw damn, Based God) and then i said ''hey, chill. I did your math assignment last weekend. I talk with you later'' then the fucking cockhead ran home crying. Well, this shit happened outside, nahmszayin. So the principal limped up to a nigga and said 'mhm-hmm-hmm. I grow rather concerned over your sexual misconduct in front of other students' I just jumped up and headbutted the motherfucker, word! He staggered aroun bleedin like that bitch's cooch and he whipped out his cell phone and cawld tha cahpz. Not long afta that, the po-po vehicle pulled up. Officer Fukawitz walked up to me and said ''eeeeh, y-you're that guy who does those mad thrrlllow-ups, props brozilla firesocks. Maaahn, I'ma overlook this felony an give you this 34% off at any Arbys coupon an i'll include a Stimpy figurine with the arm missin, too. Cuz youza da coolest G this side of Ganstaland an all that mock hip-hop shit'' I thanked the officer and gave the stimpy figurine to that latina hoezilla ridethecocks bitch an I said ''yo, have this to plug that nasty cunt of yours. I'ma go bomb my friend's house, his dog killed his mom so I'd say he needs it!''

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