Jump to content

other terrible adults....


Frate_Raper

Recommended Posts

Not sure it this really belongs here or not. But a while back I was bullshitting around at work with my buddy. Was reading through the "Dear Abby" type shit in the Chicago SUN TIMES. Abby had a question that she wanted to ask women about there sexual experiences in college, and how many men they slept with etc... I decided to write my own, made up version of what wouldv'e happened if I ever went to college, or was female. I wasn't expecting it to get published. Figured If I didn't go too ape shit, I'd have a shot at making the paper... So a few weeks go by at work, and I'm reading the paper and what do I see???

 

Anyway, pretty funny I thought. Probably 5 people the day it ran came up to me at work saying "check this shit out dude." Not knowing that I wrote it , until I told them ...I knew I'd make the paper someday...

 

You should have gone the extra mile by posting your own comment dissing yourself.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This forum is supported by the 12ozProphet Shop, so go buy a shirt and help support!
This forum is brought to you by the 12ozProphet Shop.
This forum is brought to you by the 12oz Shop.
  • Replies 525
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

my friend who i havent chilled with in a loong time, that went to the same hs fucked his leg up skating. he goes hard with that & shit. he told me to swing by so i brought over another friend & we totally smoaked a phatty. we realized today that prank calling people is still funny like middle school.. i know its lame & shit but we were dying laughing. called up some wankster from our hs wants to be a rapper & pretended to be a talent agency. he called me out right away & said "i know its you _____" & i just said "oh ok - just letting you know you suck & we still hate you" then hung up. holy shit we were rolling at that one. the retarded part is that we tried calling him again, but he didnt pick up

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 weeks later...
Probably 5 people the day it ran came up to me at work saying "check this shit out dude." Not knowing that I wrote it , until I told them ...I knew I'd make the paper someday...

 

You have 5 people in your job reading Dear Abby?

 

the fuck?

 

 

i'm calling bullshit. or calling you a faggot. either way, good troll. anything that long and mediocre to write has to be true.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I was christmas shopping this weekend and was getting super pissed off.........so while asking a lady for help for some necklace shit I lost it.

 

 

After not understanding I need the chain to be 24in, I changed my game up.

 

 

I told her that it needed to be the width of my finger to support my mothers medallion, she got snotty and and wanted to know what kind of medallion it was.....when i told her it was a hand holding a mic she'd won in a rap battle, the teenaged girl working with her burst out laughing and I was asked to leave.

  • Like 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

OK SOOOOOOO TODAY

 

I was fending a coffee and went to Time Hortons, our version of Dunken, and the chick at the drive through was a raging CUNT!!!

 

So the night before I had eaten a huge bag of popcorn and was gassy as fuck.

 

 

I timed my fart just right that as I rolled down my window to hand her my money I actually waved my freshly expelled gas at the Cunt serving my coffees face.........the look on her face was priceless, it was as if her shitty day caught her half standing!

 

 

I laughed so hard that i couldn't drive and had to sit in the parking lot until i was done.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

whenever i'm a passenger in a car i'll say "oh ya fucker! look at that!" all excited and point whenever i see a dog taking a shit...

 

i usually get a sigh and a look of utter disappointment from them...

I usually crack up when I see that

 

especially if the dog is slowly inching forward in his poo crouch stance, leaving a hansel and gretel style poo trail

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hah!

 

i posted a story in here a while back where i thought i was trowing something at my mate's mum's car, but ended up ruining some poor Chinese mans day on his way to an important business meeting, i seen said mate oot last friday for the first time in years, and he was all like "ahright Rolf? what're you doing with yourself these days? still throwing fruit at cars..?"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

had a telemarketer call the house the other day.

we still get this shit all the time at dinner but i wasnt about to just hang up on this one.

she asked for my old man, and i replied that i was him. my dads a drinker so my conversation went like this:

 

"yeh this shis himm ... whaddya want."

 

"are you alright to speak to me on the phone, mr. ____?"

 

"jussfine what. can. i doferya."

 

"well, i was calling to update our records since the last time we talked. you see ---"

 

"I CANT EVEN TASE THIS SHICKEN. I AM TOO DRUNK TO TASE THIS SHICKEN." *slam table 3 times*

 

"Mr. _________ is there a better time to reach you?"

 

"SHUT UP BITCH!" *slam table again* "Nooo lissen, I'll callyuu back. Doncallme. I will. Call you."

 

 

Bet she had fun coding that one.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...