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abcs

my fucked up new situation

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First and foremost I owe in the neighborhood of 20K. Im on probation and in school but have no job and no car. So today my mom was talking at her brothers and sister about moving my grandpa into an assisted living place but he aint having none of that... So..... i became the answer. On Thursday i'm moving to Southfield.( a mile and a half from Detroit) and getting paid 2K a month to cook, clean, shovel snow, do laundry... Pretty much everything around the house that an 86 year old is no longer capable of doing. I have no idea how i'm going to entertain him. Its going to be lonely as shit. I wont be able to have any visitors. Im gonna be stuck. I cant just sit around and get drunk, cant drive. Looking for suggestions... Please help

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this would be different if he wasnt kinda crazy. He calls like 3 times a day with some new

insane story. Yesterday he called convinced people were stealing his garbage cans. I guess

he confronted a neighbor about it. Today he said little girls were there and then they disappeared

and he was all confused thinking they were his responsibility. He thinks homeless people are living

in his attic. Hes afraid to leave his room at night so he pisses in bottles. This situation is

potentially a nightmare

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and yea. Im getting paid 2 K but its a job. Im going to have

to deal with aunts and uncles i dont get along with. Dude is going

to think im stealing his food. When i asked about bringing my computer

for school work he was all like. Dont they use alot of electricity....

mind you hes worth a few mil

 

and the house smells like piss. Step 1 im steam cleaning the whole spot

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When he went off sayin homeless people were living in the attic

I went over and nailed the attic shut. So the next day he calls sayin

the board is different... that the homeless people nailed a new board in

place. He thinks he can smell "reefer" and beer coming down from

there. Its sad really. Im not making fun so dont misinterpret it.... All

im sayin is that i think i'm in over my head

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Your Grandpa just wants his favorite grandchild around again to molest again.

 

You're not gunna refuse a poor old man's bucket list and break his heart are you?

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Buy a Nintendo Wii, old folks love that shit.

 

Get the internet and show gramps the world of internet porn.

 

Both my above sentences will keep him entertained for hours.

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Sounds like a good time to focus on school, pay off your debt, and get your shit in order.

 

Or, if you want a generic Ch0 response - steal his pills and keep him confined to his room by convincing him that the homeless people are getting potentially violent and he's not safe to go into the rest of the house.

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Yea man. Im going to try the videogame system route but im gonna have to buy it.

The old man is so cheap he wont even kno hes paying me. My aunt takes care of his

taxes and they are going to pay me secretly.

Im going to catch shit for taking long showers, eating his food, watching his TV. Using electricity

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Slowly kill him and inherit the place.

 

Show him the Coneheads and tell him its a documentary.

 

Invite black people over.

 

Be happy you get paid mad money and get to move out of Detroit?

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Sounds like a good time to focus on school, pay off your debt, and get your shit in order.

 

 

Thats pretty much how im going to look at this. Only reason i even made a thread is this just fell on me spur of the moment and its a HUGE life altering situation

 

kinda feels like im getting paid to go to jail

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in all honesty i would suggest filling his attic with stoned drunk bums and hiding all of his garbage cans, maybe he'll decide to take the retirement home option. start small, removing any and all bottles from the premisis, as for you.... meth is probably the way to go.

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