abcs Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 getting old. Not talking your in your 30s and feeling old. The scoop is my grandpops in his 80s. Widower. Worked his whole life. Saved every penny top tip. All he has going on is calling people on the phone and going to church. When i talk to him he tells me how lonely and bored he is but I can never think of anything to suggest he do. As fucked up as it sounds after i talk to him all i can think to do is smoke another cigarette to speed up my own process and thats the truth. I been giving it a bit of thought lately. Dude cant really drive anymore. All i can think to do it take him to a baseball game and have him over every so often. Tell him to walk up to the library and find a book to read. Thinking he should buy a car and fix it up Like some classic type shit. Give him something to get out of bed to do atleast. Its kinda bumming me out. Anybody got any suggestions? Other aspect that kinda fucks me up. I myself am single The idea of getting married and having a family has never appealed to me. Problem is to do so is like an insurance policy. To ensure you aren't lonely when you get old i guess. Shit i don't like to think about but at the same time its shit i need to consider. Maybe if i make it to be too old i will just abuse hard drugs. Sucks when after considering all the options that finds its way to the top of the list.... or atleast close to it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R@ndomH3ro Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Hang out with him more. I bet he has a lot of great stories. Hang out, play cards, take gramps to the games and parks. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mudpuddles Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 do you play chess? old people just like to talk i've found in my new job at a medical clinic. they don't seem to care what about.... usually the octogenarians i meet just want to chat you up. as for the family business. it's not for everyone but it sure as hell aint an insurance plan.... this shit takes work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
armand hammer Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 spend every minute with the old geezer it may seem like tedious shit but you wont be hating yourself once he passes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 my grandma just died a few months ago...best thing you can do is continue doing what you are doing. Spend some time.... Older people like to talk about the past a lot, if I could go back I would have recorded some of the conversation we had about family history....all the change over the decades etc. Just keep hanging out... if not that then....prostitute? I kid..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 I like when hes around and he likes to be around. At 1 point i even offered to move in and keep him company. Ya kno. Take care of household work and shit like that but he didn't want to have me. He got a nice house and all but hes alone all day every day and i feel sorry for him.. I always spent alot of time with him when my grandma was still alive but my license is fucked up so i cant see him without transportation help. I think he should move to a nursing home. Not on the whole lets get rid of grandpa top tip. Not for selfish reasons. I think he needs to be around people his age but i dont think he would go for it. I mean. I cook for him all the time. Freeze up like 10 tupperware meals at a time. Every other week. Shit like that but i cant really hang out hang out with him. Its hard for me to do.. Its hard to talk to him for me. First off its hard for me to talk about my grandma. I miss her alot. I think he has alot of regret from the war. He was a Ranger. Thats a topic he doesn't talk about. Chess is a good idea. Not serious here but i almost feel like he needs to develop a shoplifting hobby, or something. Hook him up with some krink 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aikr Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Yeah it took me a while before I started talking to my grandpa about the old days and hanging out with him playing cards and doing small things But it's cool in reality dude had a lot of great stories to be told and I didn't feel so bad after he died There's really not much you can do but be active in his life and show him you care That's really what theyw ant overall When you get to that age alot of it is deep reflection and thinking on lifes lessons But there's no point to any of that if they have noone to talk to Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shameless self promotion Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 My grandmother is 91 and lives alone. Shes a trooper. She hates talking on the phone and will literally hang up on you whenever she feels like it. I drop by and shes either watching golf or college football. Even if its replays. She loves it. She probably is still the biggest tiger woods fan out there. lol. As for your grandpops, i got no ideas. Old people do whatever they want. Regardless if you try to help em. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Not on the whole lets get rid of grandpa top tip. Not for selfish reasons. I think he needs to be around people his age but i dont think he would go for it. This isnt epic thread here but i appreciate the ideas my grandma lived alone until she was 88 or 89...and thats fine and all, but she still tried to do all the household stuff....ended up getting hurt a few times. we got her to move into a nursing home, and at first she didnt like it, but she ended up loving it. A lot of those places have activities throughout the day, older people are quick to make friends most of the time, and the family can always visit. It was one of the best things we could have done for her. To pay for it, we rented out the house she was living in before moving in. you're a good guy to think of your gramps bro....props Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 props will be spread. Im 24d but i appreciate those of you that have responded. Its a difficult situation. I suppose im not the only one with shit like this going on. The more i think about it weed seems like a real good solution. I dont kno if or how i would break the ice on that one. But seriously. Get the old man a med pot card. Sit him down in front of some cartoons get him laughing. Set him up a sick grow room. Between growing the shit and smoking the shit thats a pretty acceptable outlet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mudpuddles Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 that does suck he doesn't want you to stay around there and help. ralphy is right about them ending up getting hurt. they don't want help, i guess too proud or just don't realize what time does to your body. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rushawn wuan Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 go to the shooting range with him, thats one of the ways pops and i bond easy with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Getoe Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Spend time. My grandma lived alone right down the street from me when she died. All I had to do was visit her. I never did. My dad had to break down the door to find her lying next to the coffee table. And it kills me when I wonder how long it took, and was it painful? I know I'm not perfect and you can't blame a dumb kid who's busy trying to fit in. But at least I coulda stopped by. Maybe I would of been there and could of called the paramedics. Punk ass kid. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Weapon X Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 WHEN YOU'RE OLD AND ALONE AND YOUR LOOKS AND CHARM HAVE FADED, ONLY YOUR MONEY WILL LOVE YOU BACK. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr.feeny Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 these are the LittLe things that make me think about caLLn it quits at 25 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
publicenemyno.3 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 it might be fucked up to say, but introduce him to drugs. he's earned the privilege to do whatever he wants and if he wants to get stoned or whatever, indulge him. i know when i get old, i wanna get high as a motherfucker on all of the drugs that i was too chickenshit for whatever reason to try as an adolescent. maybe get him a prostitute. seriously though, just hang out with him. you'll learn more than your could ever imagine about your family and yourself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gasfacevictm Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Not serious here but i almost feel like he needs to develop a shoplifting hobby, or something. Hook him up with some krink Dude, he might like writing his name on shit. You never know. Or he might think it's an awful thing to do to people's property. It's a coin flip. The more i think about it weed seems like a real good solution. I dont kno if or how i would break the ice on that one. But seriously. Get the old man a med pot card. Sit him down in front of some cartoons get him laughing. Set him up a sick grow room. Between growing the shit and smoking the shit thats a pretty acceptable outlet. I got my mom to smoke with mr by telling her it was good for her aches and pains. You know your grandpa has to have some aches. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
volcom8811 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 crinkle clothes and no more hoes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mudpuddles Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 i wish i lived closer to my gma. she's the only one i got left and she's getting all fucked up. can't go up stairs and shit. she keeps buying flip flops just to realize she can't keep them on her feet when she walks anymore and she just ends up mailing them to me via my mom (which she then keeps.) i wish i could get that woman to talk about her past..... she had two kids by two different dudes by the age of 18 out of wedlock in the 50's. she acts like it never happened. even though the offspring are well and in her life. well one of them, the other one is crazy and all but disowned by all family. that's pretty slutty for the times. if your grandpa is anything like my grandma i would suggest watching a steven segal or jean-claude van dam marathon with him. but i doubt that's the case. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hahaha760 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 spill a few pints with him and watch gran torino Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercer Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Take him to do something you know he never did before and make it fun. We took my grandma out on a boat (she never did that shit before or even left 30 miles from where she was born probably) That shit had to add at least a good year to her life. Old people are on to something, they know being around good people having fun is what counts just like kids do. Shit gets boring after 80 fucking years, need new shit to help re-stoke the brain, make new neuro connections. Guaranteed, instead of a ball game, take him to see some girls wrestle in KY jelly and he'll be good for a month. Old people need to wrap their minds around some new shit, being around their closest peeps makes it tolerable enough to enjoy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
50million Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 he needs a hobby. my grandpa is in the same boat. drinks too much and watches tv. yup. that was about it. then he cut back on the brandy and started volunteering at the senior center. now he goes to other senior's houses and fixes their ceiling fans, computers, etc....etc... since your grandpa cant drive, is there anything around his house? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gasfacevictm Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 if your grandpa is anything like my grandma i would suggest watching a steven segal or jean-claude van dam marathon with him. but i doubt that's the case. My grandma loved Death Wish movies for some reason. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gat Bush Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 Like someone else said, have him get a grow room. Gramps learns a new skill (ie teh w33d gr0wz) And you sell a da pot, mon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abcs Posted April 24, 2010 Author Share Posted April 24, 2010 yea fiddy. I kno he does. The other problem for the guy. Hes alone all the time, not as sharp as he used to be but not senile by any means but he will say some shit like. "people are breaking in and living in my attic" "i smelled the dope and beer" Constantly losing shit. He doesnt like my uncle so unk is the constant suspect whenever something goes missing. It could be anything too. His belt. Vitamins, a hat. All the alone time and he cooks up some crazy shit in his mind. There have been times when i feel like giving him distance so i dont become the "guy" thats breaking in and taking his things. Im trying to figure out new hobbies and activities because he really doesn't have any. I cant accept that because i know people need purpose and reasons to keep on well... living and being happy 1 thing i did do a few days back was register for a class at the college near his house 1 day a week. Unless hes entirely against it im gonna try and stay the night. Cook him up some dinner and lunch. Make sure if there are any chores i handle them. Make sure theres food in the freezer. Try and bring something for him to get into. Still brainstorming on what that will be but im trying 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CityonSMASH Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 best go see that man, or youll be living in a world of regret once he passes son. unfortunatly i do not do, as i preach. maybe this thread will cannon ball a phone call to my grandpops. love that guy. never see him, and the dude is within a ten minute drive. sick. i hate my forgetfullness sometimes as it comes across rude. but i just dont remember things very well. until sometimes its to late. tigers games are cheap. take him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercer Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 A nasty crack habit will liven up things for the old bloody wankahhh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spring Break '92 Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 My grandpa was talking about Tiger Woods and said, 'fuck it, he got some pussy, so what?' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
En Sabah Nur Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 my grandma died recently, the only one i was actually interested in talking to. i never spent enough time w/ her because my parents are divorced and my dad is HORRIBLE at keeping me in touch with his side of the family even though i like them way better than my mom's side (who i've had too much compulsory time with); i like them way more than i like him, even. other problem is... the older she got, the faster her english disappeared, and my samoan is elementary. i got back from a 2 month trip to american samoa in december. i'd taken a picture with her younger sister there. i had it framed and was going to give it to her. i was back a month and a half and never got around to it, and my dad failed to mention she'd been hospitalized for seizures twice in that time until the point she was no longer waking up. i tried taking the picture in the last 2 or 3 days of her life, but i don't think she woke up to see it. #183753 on my list of life failures. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MedicineCabinet Posted April 24, 2010 Share Posted April 24, 2010 mortality sucks, teach him to scribble or find him a lady friend ask him what he likes/liked as a hobby, give suggestions, & build on that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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