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makineasykills

Shitting your pants. It happens.

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So I was at work today and a co-worker showed me this video.

Needless to say i laughed for a couple of minutes...I got into a discussion with him about shitting your pants and he told me he was walkin home after a long night of drinking and shit himself. I thought it was hilarious until my other coworker who is a decent lookin girl told me that she was high one night and sharted her pants...I seriously thought i was gonna die. Anyone on here have any funny stories about themselves or people they know shitting themselves...i find it hilarious everytime.

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i got bit by a black widow and it gave me gnarly stomach problems and muscle control issues. i shit myself a couple of times but it wasn't like poop, it was like 95% water.

 

i ended up having to wipe my ass so many times it got raw, so i stopped doing it and would just walk to the shower to clean up after pooping.

 

don't get bit by a black widow.

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Funny... this happened to me the other night.

 

I was having a terrible night and was on my way home from work and had a nice fart brewing up in my stomach. I let that puppy loose, felt the burn, and sharted.

 

 

I went home, threw my shitty boxers away, took a shower, and headed to the bar.

 

 

The night looked up after that.

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my brother sharted one time at work. he came home and looked at me and said 'i gotta change my pants and go back to work'. i fucking died.

 

i think i told this story in the other thread too....

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Back in the day (and by that i mean two years ago) i was walking with my buddies and i tried to let a fart out, and needless to say it wasn't a fart.

I caught the turd before it made it past my boxers by holding them skin tight to my thigh, and walk like that for about 10 minutes until i found a store with a bathroom.

I ended up leaving the turd and my boxers on the ground in the bathroom, and the half a roll of tp i used to wipe myself down clogged the toilet.

I wish i still had the picture of the carnage i ensued.

It ruled.

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i was at a house party two years ago and before that i pulled one of my notorious hmong store candy surplus binges and bought 7 packs of these

 

file_1_3.jpg

file_2_2.jpg

and one of these

2001-08-16-candy.jpg

and consumed all of it in a two hour frenzy... little did i know beer makes it into a mentos and diet coke bomb in your intestines ..mid keg pump my ass erupted in what i can only describe as the equivalent of dumping a gallon of egg yolk down the back of my pants and the sound of popping giant bubble wrap under water.

 

the concrete is still stained lime green to this very day

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a homie of mine in like 5th grade shit his pants, kept it a-stewing cause he was embarasses, and the teacher called him to do some shit in the front of the class. as he got up, the shit-stew spewed from his pantleg and left a lil puddle.

the end.

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one time i had to shit all night when i met up with my homie to go do a roller on some roof top.

the whole walk to the roof i was telling dude that i had to shit,

but when we got to the spot the feeling dissipated.

cool.

climb roof,

take out roller/extension/paints,

BOOM POOP FEELING RETURNS,

i was like FUCK DUDE, ITS HAPPENING, THIS IS HAPPENING,

so i quiet as possible ran to a dark spot of the roof,

took a shit,

used my sweet gloves w/ grip dots on them to wipe my butt,

dropped the gloves down an air duct in the roof,

then we did the roller without any complications.

 

i still laugh whenever i see that roof top when i'm back home.

piece got buffed in like a week too, lame because it was a great spot.

true story/no flicks, sorry.

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