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Avoided getting boner during sexual health test


Swindle

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nioggga.

 

my nigga swibndz.

 

im drunk and fuck uyou.

 

 

b ut i loves you.

 

 

i hates y life.

 

for real i hopemi dei soon,

 

coke, vicoden and vodka ftw....

 

FML.

 

 

once more i hope i die soon.

 

 

you need to slow down dude. and i know you dont mean cocaine, you mean coca cola. you need to relax, ayebee is the only one who makes suicide threads. your threads need to continue to consist of your hilariously awkward sexual advances towards females.

 

Hahaha Swindle!

 

:lol: this was bound to happen at least once.

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my dude i got some sizzling dick drip a few years ago. when i pissed it hurt so bad i ripped the towel rack out of the wall.

i went to the free clinic and a real doctor, they both gave me cipro. the stuff that kills anthrax.

 

wait what was my point? oh the cotton swab hurt just as much as the piss. the point, dont let older hospital nurses with tongue rings and big droopy titties with name tats on them zuck ya dick when visiting a sick family relative. i made the gods angry.

 

come to think of it that bitch prolly didnt even work there

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wow this is hilarious cuz this jus happened to me

 

so im affraid to get a boner while gettin a physical,no i aint gay,dude jus goes off by himself..anyways so before i goto the clinic..i rub one out..then leave...finally get there,doc says get naked..i do i notice he looks up at mean gives me a weird look..i look down an noticed i got dried nut all over my dick...then we make eye contact..and it got alot weirder...

 

 

oh also got crabs once

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I got epididymitis when I was 26. Not fun, it felt like someone was literally standing on my nuts. So I went to Kaiser and told the nice lady doctor "it feels like someone is standing on my nuts, plz advise."

 

She gave me the deep quiz about where I was putting my thing, fondled 'em, then gave me antibiotics and some Vicodin and told me to go home and rest for a couple days and not have sex or drink booze till the antibiotics were gone.

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i think i've been about 3 times. the first time i got tested for aids and every other std under the fuckin' sun. i felt fuckin' disgusting and really disappointed in myself thinkin' i'd been daft enough not to use a rubber.

some old male indian doctor asked questions while this old nurse issused the cocktail umbrella swiftly down the japs eye. i easily stayed soft for that.

i think i've been back twice since then. and had some not bad lookin' nurse play aboot with my cock on the more recent visit. i avoided gettin' a pinger that time.

 

but my firend tried to pull the nurse that tested him while he was at a club, giving her all the chat up lines until she eventually reminded him why she had such a familiar face...

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Ive told this one around here before but I guess this is as good as ever.

 

15-16 years old. Thought I had breast cancer(wtf? I know right?). I go in, and this fine ass young nurse comes in and rubs that warm gel stuff all over my nipple to do a sonogram(sp?). Had to fight that one pretty hard.

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so you're saying you have an sti?

 

i got head from a girl from sao paulo once on a cruise ship. i immediately got back and got one of those tests done. they took blood for a few tests, and for some other test they shoved a q tip inside my dick and swirled it once. imagine rug burn in the tip of your dick. the pain lasted a few minutes, wasn't crippling but fuuuuuuu

 

a week later im with my boy to go pick up the test, except he didn't know where we were going until we got there. i told him i had to find out if some bitch gave me aids. he said i couldn't get back in the car if i had aids. fair enough.

 

i am std free. which kinda means, on that day my count restarted at zero. you know, the "omg did i fuck that chick and forget about it?" count. it was a good day to start fresh. i highly recommend you get a test if you've ever fucked a questionable skank.

 

yo son HIV can have up to a 6 month incubation period...

 

you might still have AIDS from Brazil

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wow this is hilarious cuz this jus happened to me

 

so im affraid to get a boner while gettin a physical,no i aint gay,dude jus goes off by himself..anyways so before i goto the clinic..i rub one out..then leave...finally get there,doc says get naked..i do i notice he looks up at mean gives me a weird look..i look down an noticed i got dried nut all over my dick...then we make eye contact..and it got alot weirder...

 

 

oh also got crabs once

 

ahahha even before I finished reading I was like...what if theres remaining spooge? but...it was answered.

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