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So I'm off to a good start.


TheShaneCo.

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Wake up hungover - girlfriend that broke up with me tries to get back together with me over AIM - no dice.

 

Finally that's over, go to take a dump - do that thing where pee shoots out from in between the toilet seat, don't notice - a whole load of really stinky hangover pee on the floor soaking into my sweat pants.

 

Realize what's happened, change into shorts in freezing cold house, start cleaning up pee with tile cleaner (which contains bleach) make chlorine gas (pee contains ammonia) - eyes turn blood red have hard time breathing, realize I'm offing myself and run out of the bathroom.

 

I still have a dump to take but I'm scared to go back in the bathroom.

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^^^ good luck with tht... i vowed to never do tht again!! might as well shit on the dinner table....

 

as far as the pee thing never happened to me.... maybe its cuz my penis rests in the toilet water when i duke it out.... wow thts was nasty!! i made my self gag...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

lucyethel_i_love_lucy.jpg

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oh my god I am hungover

I slept with a crazy coworker last night: here's where everything falls apart.

 

 

haha, when we were like 18 my buddy was working at a company that you called when your credit card declines, this dude would figure why.. anyways, this chick he worked with who was about 22 called him over to help her with her internet or some shit, he goes over, she starts jerking him off in the cubical, the boss comes over so my buddy dives under the computer and starts playing with wires saying "oh this looks like the problem" till the boss left, they agree to meet in the bathroom, he goes in, she instantly starts sucking his dick, he starts fingering her, a couple minutes into he says he put his hands on the top of the stall as she blew him and he noticed this weird chunky looking goo on his hands, he starts realizing what it is and thinking hes got some viral cabin fever shit on his hands he starts getting grossed out and starts dry heaving, the chick starts freaking out, he runs to to the sink, pukes out his intestines and starts washing his hands, then just kinda sat down stuck in shock, the chick ran out crying cause she thought he was having a stroke...

 

she never came back to work.

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I had nothing planned last night

 

This girl hits me up asking me to come over, her boyfriend is outta state, so of course i go.

 

Hung out. No booty because she was feeling guilty about cheating on her boyfriend with me before.

 

Came home, homies were all high.

 

No goods left.

 

Went to bed.

 

Now i'm just eating cereal.

 

Not off to a good start..

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I had to leave my car in a Harris Teeter parking lot Saturday morning because of the snow. Not a regular thing in my area, and the DOT is understaffed. They didn't start clearing the roads till today. Went and got it this morning, got stuck three times on the way home. The last of which was in my driveway. Barely made it onto my street. I have to go to work tonight and get a ride in with a co worker. Things could be worse. At least I have beer.

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I didn't know where I dropped my friend off till I called them. One scrape on my palm, and throw up on the rug. I went through a 8 mile portal from downtown. I'm told I had words of wisdom, but that it was almost like revolutionary stock photo shit replacing me turned up to 11 cause I was blacked.

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lols all around on this thread. Woke up hung over with a heart racing for whatever reason at 6am and been up since then. No females for my story.... :( although come march I will be visiting the home town again and I do it will be a couple days of straight boozing and fornicating.

 

As for the chick with the boyfriend...you should of had that bro. I had my chance with a situation like that and messed up...well I was back down to get the rest of my stuff during a final moving trip, been awake for 24 hours, was out drinking, the girl hit me up, and I passed out of exhaustion before we could meet up.... >_<! I will redeem myself in March.

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