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I shat on my parents today.


Fist 666

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so there i was, skyping with the wife when i felt the pressure of a fart, so casually i leaned to my left. "Hey babe, i gotta fart, this is gonna be loud!"

3

 

 

2

 

 

1

 

"fuck. i think i just shit my pants. yep. fuck. call you back in a bit."

 

so i shit my pants technically in front of my wife. oops.

this was a lesson learned in "don't eat the foods offered by the afghani border police. i've shit 15 times today. my ass is chapped. the last time i shit my pants was in 7th grade. and it wasn't this messy. sigh.

 

how is everyone else doing today?

 

 

 

 

oh, and here's some boobies.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

amy_reid_great_tits_008.jpg

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. I have been hearing about alot of people shitting in they're pants these days. Could be a fluke.

 

But a old man once told me years ago. As you get older you must use caution when farting. As it may not always be just a fart.

 

This sounds like a good example of that. It might be time for you to carry baby wipes and spare clothing.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Happy holidays, and here some more boobies.

boobies.jpg

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

Mm Amy ried makes the picture of you shitting your pants dissipate from my mind. Anyway this has nearly happened to me recently as well, after a heavy night on the booze and eating a double quarter pounder it just wants to come out, and I know to not fart when I feel my guts rumble.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

didnt shit myself but almost got there. My mom thought it would be a good idea to put hot jalepenos on a burger, so i cookd two and threw em on there.

VERY BAD IDEA.

tasted wierd, and now I got the shits.

this will be the 2nd day in a row witrh cramps, dammit.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

i blacked out drinking whiskey with a bunch of friends and literally tried to murder several of them. beat myself up. cut a chunk of one of my tattoos out with a razor ripped a bike chain off and whipped it around trying to fuck people up then passed out on a sidealk.

woke up with shit in my pants.

and i had lost my awesome train hat.

THEN i had to walk a good 7-8 miles.

with shit pants.

THEN ride a bus.

it was probably the worst day of my life so far.

shitting your pants is wack.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

when i was in 2nd or 3rd grade this new kid showed up..he hadnt been there long. so were sitting there and some kid is all..whats that gross smell or some shit. so theyre thinking it was something in the AC. the teacher was doing some sherlock homles shit and it turns out new kid shit his pants and didnt tell anyone. embarassed? yes.

his name was pacer.

do you know him? where oh where did you go pacer?

i feel like ive talked about this on here before. maybe.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

A friend of mine once tried to fart in another friend's face, and shit himself. That was pretty amazing.

 

Another time, I saw this dude try to pull the old "cup your hand over a fart and then stick it in someone's face" gag, and instead wind up with a handful of warm diarrhea.

 

 

 

Farts are a double edged comedic sword.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

nothing in the world is more funny than watching someone shit their pants.,

 

 

I remember when i was in Jr. High and there was this tall goofy kid who shat his pants in class. so instinctively everyone in the class SMELLED it & laughed at him (point and laugh). he denied the fact that he shit himself over and over and came up with the excuse that he was playing football with friends the day before and he stepped in dog shit. After awhile someone noticed shit smear down his leg and called him out on it. come to find out the shit fell on the floor in class and he put it in his shoe and was wearing it the whole class. everyone was chanting "Chris shit his pants!!! Chris shit his pants!!!!!!". We all watched him dump the poo out of his sneaker. EPIC!!

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

My school were in the countrys basketball final and the whole school went up to watch it. On the way back one poor lad shat his pants and for the next 2 hours the bus stank of shit. I was on a diffferent bus but I got a few phonecalls from people saying that some guy shat his pants. Our bus had a great laugh. Aparently one of the teachers sitting beside him made some guy swop with him so he could get to the back of the bus away from the smell.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

My girlfriend had a wet burrito for the first time the other week.

Somehow we ended up in a walmart because I wanted to laugh at people.

She rips a gross fart... I'm like "haha nice one".

She wasn't laughing because she sharted her pants. Priceless.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

WOW, thats disgusting. if my girlfriend farts nevermind shits her pants in front of me best believe i'm not talking to her no more. you must of been at wal mart shopping not laughing at people if your the one with the girlfriend that "rips" em while your out in public.

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Re: I shit my pants today.

 

I remember I had a teacher who would make us do P.E even if we didn't have our kit. (white shirt, shorts and plimsolls) One kid didn't have his kit, so he had to wear what he had underneath his school uniform: vest and underpants. I was several feet behind him with his back facing towards me, and noticed he was trying to get the teacher's attention, as he was waving his arm about I noticed a lumpy snake-like bulge rapidly forming in his underpants.

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