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if you wanted to break up with your girlfriend...


sausage party

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^LOL...the best gift is silence like lord said...especially if you've been wronged (ie cheated on, shit on, or generally treated like a sub-human by your respective partner). A rock don't talk, and bitches get all weepy and apologetic when left in the dust after thinking THEY were the shit, knowing full well they couldn't compare to you in many ways, hence the uppity bullshit they tend to push...This will give you time to think, and her all the time to hate herself...THEN the savage sex, followed by telling her to lose your number...classic.

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surprise butt sex.

 

thinking back, I did that with the last chick I dumped. the night before telling her to kick rocks.

 

after she goes "Wow, I never done THAT before.."

think she liked it...

 

also, she did ass to mouth. gross, but i have no shame. (her ass to her mouth, just for clarification)

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squeeze every last cent out of her in the next month or so. "aw dude, i had to take my car into the shop and it was $ridiculous.expensive so im going to need to bum from you for the next month" have her buy you food every day. tell her you lost one of your shoes while out painting and you need a new pair real quick. etc etc. ring that bitch out.

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