MAR Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 /NH Bob Evans Had A Nice Sausage A Free Times Reporter Reveals His Special Relationship With A (recently) Living Trademark Colonel Sanders was a mean drunk. That's what Bob Evans told me long ago. And it's the first thing I think about whenever I stop off for some extra-crispy secret recipe at my local KFC. I've kept quiet about it since our meeting. But now that Bob Evans has merged with the infinite (he died last Thursday at age 89) I feel I can safely share his story without incurring the wrath of the gravy-loving farmer. As a teen, I attended a student economics conference at the University of Rio Grande in Southern Ohio. Bob Evans' homestead was right around the corner and he was invited by the school to give a pep talk to us future entrepreneurs. I was seated behind some stooge with a big head in the large auditorium and kept craning my neck to see Bob Evans better. He noticed me and asked if I would like to come sit with him on stage. On stage with Bob Evans, himself? Hells yes! Sitting next to Bob Evans as some college official read his bio, I took the opportunity to lean over and whisper, "I like your sausage." Which is something you typically don't want to whisper in some old man's ear. "You know what makes it so good?" he said. "Everyone else puts the whole pig in their sausages. I just use the better parts." "Thanks," I told him. And I meant it. After the speech, we had some more time to talk and Bob Evans told me that before he got super rich and famous, he used to visit country diners with Colonel Sanders and Dave Thomas. They traveled around Southern Ohio, Kentucky and Western Pennsylvania, looking for - I swear I'm not making this up - recipes to yank. "Colonel Sanders liked the waitresses and he liked to drink," said Bob Evans. "He'd pick fights with the biggest guy in the restaurant. Sometimes, Dave and I had to drag him out of those places. He wanted to fight everybody." Whenever I feel down, I just think of Bob Evans and Dave Thomas leading a belligerent Colonel Sanders out of a country restaurant and it makes me smile. I'll miss you, Bob Evans. And your sausage. - James Renner Colonel Sanders, Bob Evans, and Dave Thomas (Wendy's) used to kick it!? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
...HSAMSnoytiC Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 good thing there not jewish or theyd own mcdonalds too Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KITTENS Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 well i guess this is just another one of those crazy curveballs life throws at you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vulcan5 Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 homoest thread name ever i repeat EVER!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsmbfan Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 this is just a conspiracy theory that tries to prove that fast food has a strangehold on our economy. boo. take your propganda somewhere else. crossfire for example. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LUGR Posted October 20, 2009 Share Posted October 20, 2009 Sixty years ago, Bob Luby had a dream... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAR Posted October 21, 2009 Author Share Posted October 21, 2009 can you imagine the colonel throwing it down? I mean in that fancy bow tie? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pedro dePaca Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 next time i need a pick me up, i'm gonna picture col. sanders smacking some waitress's ass and smashing a bottle of ketchup over the head of some burly line cook or other captain saveahoe that shit's hilarious. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toiletseat Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 white trash rules Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yinz n'at Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 id drink some bourbon and squeeze some titties with the colonel Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I never said I was cool. Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Bob Evans is terrible, it's like a facny Denny's if that tell you anything. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ski Mask Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 at least its not cracker barrel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I never said I was cool. Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 at least its not cracker barrel. Yeah but the Cracker Barrel gives you that cool little map... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ski Mask Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 its mostly the racism that concerns me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Deliver Colonel Sanders down to Davey Jones locker? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
northside writer Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 next time i need a pick me up, i'm gonna picture col. sanders smacking some waitress's ass and smashing a bottle of ketchup over the head of some burly line cook or other captain saveahoe that shit's hilarious. Truth! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I never said I was cool. Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 its mostly the racism that concerns me. I read somewhere that they were voted "most racist" upper management of any chain restaurant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swindle Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ski Mask Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 I read somewhere that they were voted "most racist" upper management of any chain restaurant. yep. you see that chick that got punched out by a customer? http://www.cnn.com/2009/CRIME/09/16/cracker.barrel.beating/index.html?eref=rss_us Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
I never said I was cool. Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Would you expect anything less from a guy like this? He's probably working on two brain cells. ...and I don't care how bad a situation gets, I've never got into it with anyone while their kids are around. I see a kid, I just shrugg it off. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john_gacy Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Yeah yeah yeah, big deal, Ronald McDonald and the Burger King used to roll blunts together in college, heard they teamed up with Mayor McCheese and ran a train on Birdie once. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pornbooth Posted October 21, 2009 Share Posted October 21, 2009 Colonel Sanders is a relative of mine, however i don't condone genetically modified chickens and unfortunately I don't have the pictures to prove it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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