GucciCondom Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 I would just skip all the ones that had too much of an annoying submission process. Out of everything I've ever tried online - Craigslist is what I actually got calls back from. I'd just reply to like 40 or 50 technology related jobs every day, and then field the calls by - Salary/Distance/Actual duties and call back the ones who had a nice offer. That's how I got my current job. And it's everything I could have ever asked for. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YouMad.GIF Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Man I feel u on this Earl I have been trying to find a job, a high paying one or at least something with benefits, for about three months. This past month I have applied online to 18 places, and gone to 2 job fairs. I got one callback, from a call center staffing agency, that resulted in an online assesment test that took over an hour, as well as various other forms I had to fill out. This leads to an initial interview and another 90 minute assesment test. I scored very well (96% on their software and 98% character assesment)and that led to a second interview. The second interview I was grilled on such great topics as problem solving and using examples of past job experience to relate to their work needs. I was reccomendex for the next phase, talked to a lady in HR who gave me a cheek swab drug test, asked me a few more questions, and said they would let me know if I passed my drug screen and background check. So within a few days I get a call back saying I passed the drug screen a d the background check results would take a few more days. So I'm given my training schedule and I was told my start date would be bumped a week later. After a few days I get a call saying I failed the background check, they can't tell me why over the phone, and to wait for a packet with the result and an appeals process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Organic Therapy Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 If you're on Match.com it's all good. Just take this guy for example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fgl11j7I2vE Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shai Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Oh man, I have WAY too much to say about this. I've applied at no less than 50 places in the past couple months online, and have only gotten two responses...and they were both scams. Somehow, a couple of "headhunting companies" got a hold of my application and wanted me to sign up to be on their database- for a price, of course. There's no way to check up on applications, either. I've sent numerous emails out to see if I could talk to someone or get an interview, and not one company replied. As far as walking into a place and applying, it's not much better. One example- I was trying to get a job here and I only got to talk to the manager twice in a three week period after checking in in person about seven times...and both times she told me that the hiring was up to the owners and they still hadn't reviewed the applications (I applied in late April). She told me that my chances of getting hired on were good since they were short staffed and needed three new employees by the end of May, and now it's July and I haven't heard a thing online or received a phone call. Another place I tried to apply at kept me standing around for twenty minutes while the manager and two employees searched for an application. Finally they said they were out and could I come back in a couple days, so I asked them if I could bring in a generic application with my resume and they said "No, we need you to use our application." I asked if I could leave a resume and they said I had to attach the resume to a completed application...bear in mind that this was for a $11/hr warehouse job, I wasn't applying to be an armored car driver. About half of the places I walked into told me to apply online...of course, I still haven't heard anything back from any of them. So I'm still on food stamps and doing odd jobs even though I've been trying to find a straight job for months...I never used to have a problem getting work, but considering I haven't had an on-the-books job since 2007 and my lack of patience with getting the runaround/general bullshit, my odds of being gainfully employed anytime soon aren't looking too good. I don't know how many of you have read "The Restaurant at the End of the Universe" by Douglas Adams..anyway, it seems like modern society is run by the Golgafrinchans. If you haven't read it (and you should), here's a short explanation courtesy of Wikipedia- "Golgafrincham is a red semi-desert planet that is home of the Great Circling Poets of Arium and a species of particularly inspiring lichen. Its people decided it was time to rid themselves of an entire useless third of their population, and so the descendants of the Circling Poets concocted a story that their planet would shortly be destroyed in a great catastrophe. (It was apparently under threat from a "mutant star goat"). The useless third of the population (consisting of hairdressers, tired TV producers, insurance salesmen, personnel officers, security guards, management consultants, telephone sanitizers and the like) were packed into the B-Ark, one of three giant Ark spaceships, and told that everyone else would follow shortly in the other two. The other two thirds of the population, of course, did not follow and "led full, rich and happy lives until they were all suddenly wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from a dirty telephone". "The B-Ark was programmed to crash-land on a suitably remote planet on one of the outer spiral arms of the galaxy, which happened to be Earth, and the Golgafrinchan rejects gradually mingled with and usurped the native cavemen, becoming the ancestors of humanity and thereby altering the course of the great experiment to find the question for the Answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything, or so Ford Prefect presumes. A lot of them didn't make it through the winter three years prior to Arthur Dent's reunion with Ford Prefect, and the few who remained in the spring said they needed a holiday and set out on a raft. History says they must have survived." I feel like I'm slowly being killed by middle management. Society has devolved to the point where it's run by a bunch of well dressed, polite yet impersonal zombies who can't help me or make a decision without talking to their boss, or because the right form isn't available, or because I want to apply for a job the old-fashioned way...they're programmed to do as they're told because that's what "team players" do. All right, I'm going to stop. Earl, I wholeheartedly agree with you except I don't have the homicidal urges. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrChupacabra Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 I would just skip all the ones that had too much of an annoying submission process. There was a time when this would be an option, but these days most of us looking for jobs really can't afford to just skip jobs with annoying application processes. Partially because the market is so bad, so you really need to get out as many apps as possible and also partially because more and more companies these days are going through middleman sites/companies to screen their apps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T.T Boy Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 i agree, i applied to well over 300 jobs. . multiple scams, fake jobs, seminars. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shellshock Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 that handshake looks like this http://www.ephesians5-11.org/handshakes.htm that would be some shit if every time you thought your resume didn't go through it did and they receive like 20 of your resume and when they see that they'll be like "what the fucks his problem" i wholeheartedly agree on the automated bullshit specially the ones on the telephone with customer help a 15 minutes conversation is now a 3 hour automated phone call all because you wanted to speak to one person about fixing shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ice Nerves Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 I probably won't bother reading through this thread past the first post, but why they gotta always ask the dumbest questions on them online applications that 1) how the fuck would you even know the answer without doing google searches, and 2) why the fuck they even need to know this mundane ass, usleless information in the first place? And they won't even let you continue unless you give them an acceptable answer. :headache: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earl broclo ESQ Posted July 7, 2009 Author Share Posted July 7, 2009 All right, I'm going to stop. Earl, I wholeheartedly agree with you except I don't have the homicidal urges. Yeah, that was the internet talking. I was just frustrated after spending so much time on here, only finding a handful of leads to nowhere, then having the application sites fuck with me just drove me over the edge. I guess I have serious anger management issues, which is probably why I smoke pot. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earl broclo ESQ Posted July 7, 2009 Author Share Posted July 7, 2009 There was a time when this would be an option, but these days most of us looking for jobs really can't afford to just skip jobs with annoying application processes. Partially because the market is so bad, so you really need to get out as many apps as possible and also partially because more and more companies these days are going through middleman sites/companies to screen their apps. The last time I was in a recession state, was 2001, and it wasn't anything compared to right now as far as so many layoffs leading to so many people looking. If a job posting is up for two days, you can guarantee there are at least 50 resumes before you. In 2001, I ended up working at a temp agency, then waiting tables while doing an internship (with hopes of a job lead). After all that, I decided to relocate so I took a retail management job --which is hell in itself. Now, I can't relocate, and I'm trying to change my path instead of just taking some dead end job. It's going on 4 months for me tomorrow, and shit is starting to affect my life. Sure, I've got the security of a decent unemployment check, but it's not the money that is really fucking with me. It's the rutts that I've slipped into easily. The "extended vacation state." That shit has had me in a depression for the past two weeks strong. It's starting to fuck with my whole life and I can't have that right now. I ran into a friend last night, who might have a lead to some assistant editing work. If it leads anywhere, it will be good, but only temporary. We'll see though. Either way I'm going to keep looking, and I figure I'll sign up for some classes this fall. If anything, I'll take a shit job if I can't find anything, and goto school nights and weekend. Deal with that for a couple of years, and see what I can do with whatever I learn. It's either that or I start my internet moderator's union, and collect dues which I then put into my checking account. Everyone on the "Crew" here is fine --except Bojangles. His lifestyle is too dangerous for our reputation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ferris Bueller Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 Earl, man, I feel you. I've been working on extremely reduced hours, but I'm receiving state benefits. It is starting to get to me a little bit. My current job is actually in the middle of restructuring, cutting 20% of positions in my program. If I don't get rehired in the new position I applied for, then I'm out a job, but I'll receive full unemployment (which ain't much). Anyway, I will have a lot of time on my hands. But what I was going to ask if you've looked into some volunteering opportunities? I know it's not getting paid, but it is something productive, and can count as experience. It is something I am thinking about doing if I end up being out a job, to stay productive and possibly get my foot in the door elsewhere... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrChupacabra Posted July 7, 2009 Share Posted July 7, 2009 But what I was going to ask if you've looked into some volunteering opportunities? I know it's not getting paid, but it is something productive, and can count as experience. It is something I am thinking about doing if I end up being out a job, to stay productive and possibly get my foot in the door elsewhere... I was just discussing volunteering the other day. I have a double dose of the job hunting rage/depression right now since i'm trying to find a short term job where i'm currently at so i can make some income for a few months while i start searching for a real job in some other states. I figure if i can only get part time work out here or no work at all, i might as well be volunteering while i do the serious, "real" job hunting. Keep myself semi occupied and bolster the resume a bit. Plus, as you said, there is always the possibility of making some connections and meeting people who can help you get work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwampFightOner Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 You guys need to learn to enjoy unemployment. I'm currently on a stretch where I've only worked 3 out of the last 21 months, and not at all in the last 14. I love my life Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bojangles Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 So I've been on my computer for a little over 4 hours now, looking at porn, collecting lolcats, writing beef, and basically trying to get my myspace page looking tight . Nothing wrong with a man wanting to better himself? Right FiXeD!!!:D 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommyPillfingers Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 i have given up on job resumes, interviews. i got a criminal record and no experiance besides warehouse work and manual labor, who the FUCK is gonna hire me. plus i got like 5 different kinds of drugs in me piss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SwampFightOner Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 ^ Basically haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GucciCondom Posted July 8, 2009 Share Posted July 8, 2009 Chupe, I guess shit's different now but when I was looking all the good jobs would just let you attach a resume to an email and all the gay jobs like Walmart wanted to do the bullshit process. I did one or two of them and it took me over an HOUR for each and didn't get a call back. In that time I could of spammed my resume to 50 higher paying jobs and gotten at least 2 calls back. It's all about volume fellas. Make sure your resume is fucking FIRE, and then spam, spam, SPAM, SPAM. Every single job on CL, even if your not qualified - spam that motherfucker. Shit works. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earl broclo ESQ Posted July 8, 2009 Author Share Posted July 8, 2009 FiXeD!!!:D I tried to props you, but I can't. I was just going to write "cocksucker" in my reason for props. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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