morton Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 I am preparing for a custody trial in King County Washington. I am attempting to get full legal custody and with shared residential custody as the mother is bat shit crazy has a history of domestic violence and is abusive to the child. Has anyone on here had experience with this sort of thing and if so what are your thoughts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spaceman Spiff Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Is DAO the mother? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StupidDope Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 man.. good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!@#$% Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 lawyer the fuck up. my experienmce with courtrooms tells me the best way to be prepared for this sort of thing is with a great lawyer and in your case, a private detective or some kind of documentation of the bat shit crazy or abusive part. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 I already cashed out my 401k on lawyers and I do not think they did any better than I would have done on my own. There has been a parenting evaluation performed by the family services branch of the court that recognized many of the problems of the mother but not all. One of the many bummers of the case is that the mother comes from money and has one of the better lawyers in the state. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TommyPillfingers Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 shoulda shot it into a rag!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shai Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Hopefully she'll have a meltdown in court. That's always a guaranteed good time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 True, there is only so much a lawyer can do to protect an individual from themselves. At one time she tried to get a court order barring me from calling the police or cps, the judge said "if you could pass court orders barring the calling of law enforcement it would defeat the point of having police in the first place". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GnomeToys Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Stash coke in her house, call police, problem solved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 hmm interesting.. several options. do you have joint custody right now today? or is there no custody agreement? whats the scenario? when you say she has a history of abuse to said child, does that mean its filed in police reports/ visits to the home/ etc etc. or is this just her word/lawyer vs. your word/lawyer? and when you say bat shit crazy, will she be visibly crazy in court or has she been in some type of documented treatment center? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 The state seems more forgiving of drug abuse on the part of parents then I would have thought. Especially mothers, in WA the court is in general extremely biased toward mothers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GnomeToys Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 The court will always favor the mom... I know a dude who was trying to get custody. He's straight laced, drinks maybe once a month, no drugs, has a good steady job making 50k a year... the mom has a felony, is in treatment for oxycodone addiction, and being treated for bipolar disorder. Guess which one of them gets to see the kids more? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 Some of the abuse has been pretty well documented in police reports etc but not as much as it should have been. Some of it comes down to my word vs hers. There is a temporary parenting plan in place now and I have a restraining order against her. The plan now is that the child is with me every other weekend and on wed. As to being visibly crazy in court that is hard to tell, her general courtroom presence has been very mousy and victim like but sometimes she does seem visibly confused and confounded that she is there in the first place. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 One of my concerns is that I will be outgunned by opposing counsel on the procedural side of things particularly when it comes to child support. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earmuffs Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 problem solver.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 wait.. you are in WA? what city? (if you don't mind me asking) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 If only things were that simple. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 The case is in King County Court in Seattle before Judge Dean S Lum Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 I'll pm the rest of this.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!@#$% Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 try to document as much as you can ultimately, that is what wins these sorts of cases you need solid evidence that she has done messed up shit get in touch with social services and when you talk to people, get their names and write them down.. try to get a contact in the system you can call everytime some sht happens get a private investigator if you can afford it yes, the system favors the mom pretty much always but when the mom is abusive they will take the kid away. you're in a bad position since she has money, it may just be a matter of time and record keeping Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 wait are PMs even possible? all i see is an Email option? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shai Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 Talk to her family and see what they have to say. It's a long shot, but if you can get them to see that you're honestly concerned about your kid and making sure they're in a safe environment they might be in your corner. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 !@#$% that is all really good advice, and I have tried to that as much as possible. The thing is that trial is right around the corner, as in within a couple of weeks so at this point in the game I am preparing final declarations and such getting ready for game time if you know what I mean. I never thought of a PI and am not sure what they would really be able to do, I have wondered about how to get to medical records of when she was put institutionalized as a teenager. Telo, I have never sent or received a pm on this website, feel free to email. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!@#$% Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 yeah, of course. just saying, regardless of how the trial goes, well or not, i would document stuff. plus then if she comes after you in the future you have everything written down keep like a diary basically, so even the most mundane communication is recorded i would NOT talk to her family. they are going to be behind her pretty much no matter what, and people are not usually reasonable when it comes to family. you aren't going to be able to get medical records, that is illegal especially if she was aminor at the time. this thing called HIPAA that came out a few years ago made medical records very private by law. a PI could follow her while she was with the kid and record any questiona ble behavior or action, without yopu having to put yourself in basically a position of stalking her. i suppose, have all your stuff in order and be the best dad you can be. not much you can do beyond that on very short notice. also, in court show a willingness to be a good guy to her, even if it kills you it will make you look more mature and responsible inthe eyes of the judge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted May 27, 2009 Author Share Posted May 27, 2009 Thanks for the advice, I gotta head out for a while. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shai Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 I meant that you should talk to them AFTER the trial. Talking to them before is going to look like you're trying to sway them to your side...regardless of what happens in court, tell them you're just concerned about your kid and want to make sure he/she is being looked after when they're with the mother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted May 27, 2009 Share Posted May 27, 2009 sent.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Is DAO the mother? LMAO @ this herb making up a new name just to throw my name in his mouth. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 Also, I was pissed at my ex for aborting our kid back in the day. But looking back, that shit would have been a fucking disaster anyways. We would have ended up in more or less the same boat as you. I'm not really sure what my point is, but good luck with all that. And RIP my aborted kid. Woulda been about 12 by now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted May 28, 2009 Share Posted May 28, 2009 The case is in King County Court in Seattle before Judge Dean S Lum wait are PMs even possible? all i see is an Email option? Maybe he doesn't believe in PM's, so he disabled them. He'd rather just put all his info on blast for the world to see. You should ask him for his address and social security number. He'll probably post that shit too and throw in his government name and what he writes just for the hell of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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