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I fucking hate it but I have an addictive personality. I am approaching my 32 year mark here very soon and have recently realized I have to accept it, I am not proud but I have found myself to be much happier knowing this is a part of me and probably will be for the rest of my life. My substance abuse has made me the person I am and will never want to take who I am away from me or my friends and family.

Like I say it sucks but its life, any you all got problems to?

 

 

 

DISCUSS....

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is the thread about talking about addictions or going to AA meetings? :confused:

 

addiction is healthy in life, its when it becomes obsession and takes over day to day life it becomes unhealthy, to know and respect the difference between the two is important.

 

 

on that note ima go fall asleep infront of the tv.

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Im just pointing out how addictions can suck pretty bad and im sure Im not the only one on the oontz who feels this way, just a thread to mingle and discuss these addictions. If you go to AA I think thats great maybe someone can learn how to find help through this thread, Im just hoping to do something positive for the people on the 12, thats all.

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I've been a drug addict/alcoholic going on 19 years now...I haven't drank alcohol in almost a year and a half and in that time the only drugs I've taken were a few prescription pills here and there. I didn't need AA or NA to quit using, my wife and my job pretty much took care of that. I'll be 33 in September and I wasted more than half of my life high and drunk. I'm what you would call a functioning drug addict, drugs never affected my job or my personal life...I've always been able to use and maintain....The only reason I don't fuck around with drugs anymore is because of random piss test at work.

 

Alcohol is another story though, I'm a total douchebag when I'm drunk. Over the years I've hurt and offended everyone I know at least once because of my drinking. I quit because my wife was at the breaking point and was about to leave me after 10 year of being together. That was reason enough for me to stop.

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1st off, saying addiction is healthy is an oxymoron. Even graf, which I love to death, can be unhealthy at an addiction level. People are complex beings with multiple aspects to them and when you allow any one aspect to rule over everything it's usually at the detriment of other things. You might be an awesome pitcher who doesn't tire and throws a 100MPH fast ball every single pitch, but if you can't run, catch, bat, etc., you're not much of a ball player.

 

Big props to you for knowing your personality. There are people, even on this board, who talk proudly about how much clean time they have in, yet you can tell they are miserable people who still have problems. It's the concept of the 'dry drunk.' I'm not knocking anybody's clean time, but being clean is only half the battle. You need to look inside yourself and come to terms with how you got to be the way you are, what maintained that, and how do you counter those things if not change them completely.

 

I personally do not care for AA/NA because it is a disease based model that says this is who you are forever, and the main way to counter that is AA, AA, and more AA. I think it removes some of the responsibility from people, and I'm also not into the higher power deal. I also think it's hypocritical to be there to stop your addictions and damn near everyone is smoking, drinking multiple cups of coffee, and eating powdered donuts. That being said though, some studies show that it is one of the more effective treatment methods, I'm guessing because you have an ongoing support group for life so long as you continue to go and you buy into the model. Still, I feel you can develop that for yourself outside of AA but go if it helps you to stay clean.

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almost half of my friends have been in rehab this year. i am glad that after decades, they finally accepted to get support (some were terrible drunks and junkies). being under the influence 24/7, really impairs everyday coping. many have come to realize, its a dark road. only clarity, will help with this life. i have been to a few meetings recently, and have seen its worth. my outlook has significantly improved. structure and balance, along with healthy living can help with depression and other common illness. having support really increases ones chance of managing stress and avoiding personal abuse. stay positive.

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i also agree with gacy, i don't care for AA/NA either, but do respect its fit for others. i can live with out the cult. many, including myself have gotten to this point from some other underlying issues. not only addictive personality, but self sabotage, or lack of self worth. addressing the personal struggles is only half the battle.

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"Yes I do smoke weed everyday, no I am not a fiend"

 

"You just contradicted yourself, face it you are an addict regardless of how "soft" you say weed is"

 

"It doesn't inhibit me from being an intellectual or interacting with the fam and friends hell I am talkin to you high right now so don't give me that "you are gunna create a schism" bullshit."

 

Conversation I had with a close friend, knockin me for bein a pothead, while she sits there contemplating her next pillpop. Like it's more sophisticated to pillpop therefore it's socially acceptable or some shit.

 

Weed makes me a better thinker and more patient, yea I get irritable without it but so be it. Like you said Absolute it made me who I am, still molds.

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Of course it doesn't glad you know it doesn't Protocol just another inherent ability humans have which is highjacked by religious affiliates tryin to garner as much credentials as they can.

 

"Here, god is givin you the power to change, without him you are helpless" Fuck that and fuck anyone disillusioned enough to think some celestial being has that authority.

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i don't think that i will ever not smoke weed.

that is the only substance that i will get mad fiendish for.

well, that and bacon. and dick.

 

i love you... i can share all of those things with you for the rest of our lives. you in?

 

 

 

and the rest of yous, go stick needles in your arms and jump off a roof. thats how you get REALLY high. this thread is fail.

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If getting high/wasted isn't working for you, then you'll make a conscious decision to quit when you're 100% ready to do it. The next big step is to then change up the company you keep and where you hang out. That's not always easy but it's necessary if you really want to stick with it.

 

The good (and bad) thing is that you'll find out who your friends are that way. A good line to use is, "Hey, I need to chill out and move on to some other things in my life besides partying. I'm going to take a break, I'm letting you know because I'm going to need some support and that means I'm probably not going to be hanging out if you're going to be getting fucked up...I still want to be friends, but I gotta do this for me." Don't be judgmental, don't talk about them. Let them know this is 100% for you and that your choices aren't going to change how you feel about them.

 

There's all kinds of different ways that can go. Some people will be understanding and hang out with you and do sober activities and/or give you some space. Other people will be haters and give you shit, call you a pussy/sellout/bitch. Those aren't your friends. (Well, maybe that's not exactly it. They might be your friends but their priorities are fucked up.) Either way, whatever you do don't bring their shit into it. What they do is what they do, but it's your call and what they do or say shouldn't sway you. If someone gets funky, then say "Sorry you feel that way, it's nothing personal" and hang up.

 

Oh yeah...pay off any debts to dealers or bartenders and tell them "Hey, I'm hanging it up for a while, so don't expect to hear from me and please don't call me to see if I'm okay or if I need anything." Surprisingly, that works most of the time. If they keep calling, don't answer. There's plenty of other customers out there.

 

As far as the 12 step thing goes, 90% of the people in recovery creep me out. The 10% I'm cool with are friends that got clean that way. I've had to do court-ordered NA and AA before, it sucked for me...I won't deny that it works for a lot of people, but I just never felt comfortable at meetings or with some of the principles and practices of NA/AA. However, the funny thing is that I've gone to meetings with friends to be supportive of them when they were trying to get straight and it didn't bother me that much...maybe it was because I wasn't the one under the microscope.

 

Whatever you decide to do, good luck. I've been there, it's easy and it's not easy at the same time...but you can do it.

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