chorus Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Hey guys, it's been a long time since I've been on this forum. Nice to see everything's as it should be. :) Here is a loose update about my life. I left my "sort of girlfriend" to go out for obligatory work drinks for a new job I just got. I drank 3 beers while riding my bike over to my bosses house. I was then taken out and bought a lot of shots by my work mates including some shots of absinth. My boss had drunk these as well and the poor woman was starting to suggest that she was mighty horny. Rather than sacrifice my self (she's lovely, but not for me), I told her I'd be her wing man. She pointed out a security guard who I'd spoken a couple words to earlier that night. Me: Hey Guard: Hey, whats up? Me: Yo, I got a funny question for you, my Boss is heading to Melbourne tommorow and she wants to kiss someone before she goes. She said she was interested Guard: Does she want to go all the way? Me: Couldn't say. She was just talking about kissing someone. Later he walks past while we're all out front and I point her out 1 hour and a lot more drinks later Boss: Hey! that security guard just hit on me! Me: haha yeah Boss: haha! Fred! I'm not sure though Me: No stress either way. I then say my goodbye's and leave. As I'm very very, drunkenly riding my bike home I get a text message. I get distracted and land right into a bunch of empty garbage bins out for collection. The text message says "Hey Fred, hope you made it home ok honey. Good work with the security guard, he's comming over now! Kisses and Hugs, Love Boss" The end. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
apeshit1 Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 hahaahahaaha!!! bang the boss!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tango 24 Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 dont drink and ride Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
christo-f Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Farkin Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hypergraphia Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 dont drink and ride smoke and fly? jk Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tango 24 Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 caaaarrrnnnttt Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackson Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Good thread. I went out for work drinks too last night. Was drinking Brooklyn beer. it was ok. I also drank 3 old fashioneds and woke up in a taxi. Awesome! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CLICKCLACKONER Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 bangboss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Jefe Uno Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Pics or it didn't happen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dosa312 Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Yeah... this shit is hilarious... I expected to see some pics of you fucked up from crashing, or of your bike smashed in some cans... instead I read this tangent story of getting your boss laid... :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BruceLeroy Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 do i look like i give a fuck? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
earl broclo ESQ Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 My boss had drunk these as well and the poor woman was starting to suggest that she was mighty horny. Rather than sacrifice my self (she's lovely, but not for me), I told her I'd be her wing man. you, my friend, are a scholar and a gentleman. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thelowerclass Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 What bar are you going to that serves absinthe? Well real absinthe atleast, not the whatever the herb in it is called free version which is the only type allowed for sale in the US. In other words its likely the absinthe you had was no different then most liquors and not mentionable as a glory drink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MOOGLE? Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 glory hole 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Q666 Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 lol glory hole ftw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CACashRefund Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 yeah pics of the glory hole were you get sucked up by a homo Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Porcelain Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 so you let the gaurd hit it? but didnt even try to nail your boss? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chorus Posted March 11, 2008 Author Share Posted March 11, 2008 What bar are you going to that serves absinthe? Well real absinthe atleast, not the whatever the herb in it is called free version which is the only type allowed for sale in the US. In other words its likely the absinthe you had was no different then most liquors and not mentionable as a glory drink. It wasn't real absinth. It was just toxic cheap stuff with a high alcohol percentage. Sorry it's not mentionable as a glory drink? haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dick Quickwood Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 should have screwed the boss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chorus Posted March 11, 2008 Author Share Posted March 11, 2008 so you let the gaurd hit it? but didnt even try to nail your boss? To be honest with you, my boss isn't very attractive. She's nice, but thicker than my tastes. And I'm not really planning on keeping this job for long. So if you think I should sleep my way to the top, it's a little bit pointless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
a kid growin up Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 How do you drink ride a bike and text all at the same time? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoblow Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Goddamn, I wish I had your restraint. I've ruined many jobs/relationships by finding myself in the sitch you were in with your boss and just smashing. Still, high five for the security guard and the assist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gasfacevictm Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 The long windy road to the middle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MOE-LESTER Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 HAHAH you tried to answer a text while on a motorcycle???? your so fucking lucky you didnt get yourself killed. that is some serious dumbo shit there Nurk McGurk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mercer Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 Good thread, funny story. I would like to make a formal request.......boss photo's? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobsaysmittens Posted March 11, 2008 Share Posted March 11, 2008 If you werent ready to engage in intercourse with your lovely and horny boss... then you probably should have taken a couple more shots. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hayabusa Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 pics of boss? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shitting Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 that level of restraint rarely occurs in the australian man. congrats. however couldn't you have hooked boss up with someone lesss likely to hogtie her and cut her throat? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shitting Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 just remembered how much cooler melbourne security guards are than the ones around here. I think its because of the identification numbers right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoblow Posted March 12, 2008 Share Posted March 12, 2008 HAHAH you tried to answer a text while on a motorcycle???? your so fucking lucky you didnt get yourself killed. that is some serious dumbo shit there Nurk McGurk. I think he means a bicycle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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