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i didn't save your phone number


beardo

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hello.

 

well i was searching for my debit card/somewhat bagging my own shit/ watching my baby making sure no one snatches her, all the while talking to the guy asking him if he knew where my card was. So i hang up, i'm pissed, i write a check and leave. I buckle the babes in and realize i don't have my phone. i run back in, and it was gone.

 

shit happens.

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my cousin sent me these TMs for christmas

 

1. "i bought you a shirt and a dildo for christmas. that way if you don't like the shirt you can go fuck urself!"

 

2. "i was at the mall today and i think santa was looking for you. i kept hearing him say, HOE, HOE, HOE!"

 

3. "dont trip if you wake up on christmas morning with cum all over your face. I told Santa you wanted a white christmas."

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