Jump to content

It makes my dookie twinkle!


After School Special

Recommended Posts



 

10664.jpg

 

Even though these gold flakes are tasteless, they are normally used as decorations that give an extra luxurious touch to culinary delights and dreamy beverages. Some people even believe that edible gold has a wide range of health benefits that offer the eater special powers to rejuvenate the human body and which contribute to longevity.

 

Come check out the latest in delicacies and be sure to enjoy your "golden" gastronomic experience.

 

1. The Grand Opulence Sundae

 

83587_1.jpg

 

This is probably the world's most expensive ice cream and has a price tag of $1,000 per serving, especially available at the Serendipity Restaurant in New York. The premium ice cream sundae is beautifully garnished with a generous amount of 24-karat edible golden flakes.

 

2. Pizza Royale 007

 

83587_2.jpg

 

Perhaps you have read about the world's most expensive pizza prepared by a Glasgow based restaurateur, Domenico Crolla. With a price tag of around £2,150, you'll get a pizza with premium toppings including edible gold flakes. Viola!

 

3. Frozen Haute Chocolate

 

83587_3.jpg

 

According to the Guinness Book of World Records, "Frozen Haute Chocolate" is the world's most expensive dessert, available at Serendipity 3, New York city. At $25,000, this dessert is made up of exotic blends of cocoa, sprinkled with 5 grams of gold flakes and served in a goblet lined with a thin layer of an edible gold sheet.

 

4. Gold Liquor

 

83587_4.jpg

 

It is believed that the gold flakes in liquor are meant to cut one's throat in very tiny areas so that the alcohol may enter the bloodstream quicker for a faster effect. Although this may be an urban myth, nonetheless, there are several liquors in the market which contain gold. For instance, the "Gold Flakes Supreme" is an ultra premium vodka produced in France and marketed by the Shaw Ross Importers at about $60 per 750ml bottle.

 

"Goldschlager" is another alcohol beverage which contains edible gold flakes. This Swiss cinnamon schnapps costs around $25 per 750ml bottle. Perhaps you can also opt for "Danziger Goldwasser", a Polish herbal liquor which also contains floating gold flakes, costing around $29 per bottle.

 

5. Seville Orange Marmalade

 

83587_5.jpg

 

In 2006, to mark its 125th business anniversary, a UK fruit preserves manufacturer, F. Duerr & Son produced the world's most expensive marmalade. The "Seville Orange Marmalade", contains 24-karat gold flakes and comes in a crystal jar. It is maybe the most expensive marmalade spread for a piece of your toast.

 

6. DeLafee Chocolate and Lollipop

 

83587_6.jpg

 

A Swiss company, DeLafee International has been developing luxurious gifts decorated with gold since 2004. DeLafee's products include golden chocolates and golden lollipops. DeLafee's gold chocolate is made of premium cocoa, wrapped in an edible 24-karat gold sheet. A small box containing 8 chocolate pralines costs about $100 per box. DeLafee's lollies on the other hand are red heart-shaped sweets garnished with 24-karat edible gold flakes. Costing nearly $29 per piece, it makes a nice Valentine's Day gift.

 

7. Gold Wine

 

83587_8.jpg

 

Jayson Woodbridge, the owner of Napa based Hundred Acre came up with "GOLD" wines containing 24-karat gold flakes. GOLD comes in two 2005 vintages; one is made from California's Napa Valley's grapes and another is made from Australia's Barossa Valley's grapes. They are currently available in the US market for about $25 per bottle.

 

8. Golden Beaver Hot Sauce

 

83587_9.jpg

 

The Golden Beaver Hot Sauce contains habanero pepper extract and of course, floating 24-karat gold flakes. It costs $49 per bottle.

 

9. Gold Sake

 

83587_10.jpg

 

In Japanese culture, sake containing edible gold flakes is often consumed during the New Year's eve for luck and prosperity. There are several types of sake brands in the market which contain gold flakes. The more familiar one in the market would be the "Kuromatsu Hakushika Gold Yamada Nishiki Sake". This sake is made from premium Yamadanishiki rice and comes complete with floating gold flakes. It costs $30 per 720 ml bottle.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This forum is supported by the 12ozProphet Shop, so go buy a shirt and help support!
This forum is brought to you by the 12ozProphet Shop.
This forum is brought to you by the 12oz Shop.
starving-child.jpg

 

entirely off topic, but i did a class where we studied this photo, the dude who took it committed suicide after being awarded press photographer of the year. he couldnt handle the fact that he capitalised on watching a child die instead of trying to help them.

 

but yeah, gold in food, disgustingly fucking opulent, i hope it causes cancer.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The place with the $25k desert, Serendipity, was just shut down recently due to a shitload of health violations. Mostly related to roach and rat infestation.

 

tasty!

 

 

That is fucking hilarious. How do places like this blow up? I want to open a restaurant and charge 25,000 for a place of gold sprinkled french fries where in fact it is fake gold and the french fries are from BJ's.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest shai_hulud

Gold can be toxic, but only if a large amount is eaten over a period of time.

 

In the unlikely event that this happens to anyone from 12 oz., here's a link to the cure.

 

http://www.valuemd.com/archive/index.php/t-1362.html

 

The only thing up there I have tried is Goldschlager, and I liked it. I also like Hot Damn!, which costs about a third as much.

 

I would like to go into a resturant like Serendipity with explosive diarrhea, just so I could drop my drawers and blow ass in the dining room. I don't think it would be any more disgusting than dropping $25,000 on a mug of cocoa.

 

Going to a place like that is like cocaine. It's God's way of telling you that you have too much damn money for your own good, and not enough brains to spend it right.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest shai_hulud

And now I present, in its entirety, the "Crunchy Frog" sketch from Monty Python.

 

(Read the whole thing. It's worth it, and relevant.)

 

Praline: Hello again. I am at present still on film, but in a few seconds I shall be appearing in the studio. Thank you.

 

(Cut to studio. A door opens. Inspector Praline looks round door. )

 

Inspector Praline: (to camera) Hello. (he walks in followed by Superintendent Parrot and goes to desk) Mr Milton? You are sole proprietor and owner of the Whizzo Chocolate Company?

 

Milton: I am.

 

Praline: Superintendent Parrot and I are from the hygiene squad. We want to have a word with you about your box of chocolates entified The Whizzo Quality Assortment.

 

Milton: Ah, yes.

 

Praline: (producing box of chocolates) If I may begin at the beginning. First there is the cherry fondue. This is extremely nasty, but we can't prosecute you for that.

 

Milton: Agreed.

 

Praline: Next we have number four, 'crunchy frog'.

 

Milton: Ah, yes.

 

Praline: Am I right in thinking there's a real frog in here?

 

Milton: Yes. A little one.

 

Praline: What sort of frog?

 

Milton: A dead frog.

 

Praline: Is it cooked?

 

Milton: No.

 

Praline: What, a raw frog?

 

(Superintendent Parrot looks increasingly queasy.)

 

Milton: We use only the finest baby frogs, dew picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope and lovingly frosted with glucose.

 

Praline: That's as maybe, it's still a frog.

 

Milton: What else?

 

Praline: Well don't you even take the bones out?

 

Milton: If we took the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy would it?

 

Praline: Superintendent Parrot ate one of those.

 

Parrot: Excuse me a moment. (exits hurriedly)

 

Milton: It says 'crunchy frog' quite clearly.

 

Praline: Well, the superintendent thought it was an almond whirl. People won't expect there to be a frog in there. They're bound to think it's some form of mock frog.

 

Milton: (insulted) Mock frog? We use no artificial preservatives or additives of any kind!

 

Praline: Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog', if you want to avoid prosecution.

 

Milton: What about our sales?

 

Praline: I'm not interested in your sales, I have to protect the general public. Now how about this one. (superintendent enters) It was number five, wasn't it? (superintendent nods) Number five, ram's bladder cup. (exit superintendent) What kind of confection is this?

 

Milton: We use choicest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds whipped into a fondue and garnished with lark's vomit.

 

Praline: Lark's vomit?

 

Milton: Correct.

 

Praline: Well it don't say nothing about that here.

 

Milton: Oh yes it does, on the bottom of the box, after monosodium glutamate.

 

Praline: (looking) Well I hardly think this is good enough. I think it would be more appropriate if the box bore a large red label warning lark's vomit.

 

Milton: Our sales would plummet.

 

Praline: Well why don't you move into more conventional areas of confectionery, like praline or lime cream; a very popular flavour I'm led to understand. (superintendent enters) I mean look at this one, 'cockroach cluster', (superintendent exits) 'anthrax ripple'. What's this one, 'spring surprise'?

 

Milton: Ah - now, that's our speciality - covered with darkest creamy chocolate. When you pop it in your mouth steel bolts spring out and plunge straight through-both cheeks.

 

Praline: Well where's the pleasure in that? If people place a nice chocky in their mouth, they don't want their cheeks pierced. In any case this is an inadequate description of the sweetmeat. I shall have to ask you to accompany me to the station.

 

Milton: (getting up from desk and being led away) It's a fair cop.

 

Praline: Stop talking to the camera.

 

Milton: I'm sorry.

 

(Superintendent Parrot enters the room as Inspector Praline and Milton leave, and addresses the camera.)

 

Parrot: If only the general public would take more care when buying its sweeties, it would reduce the number of man-hours lost to the nation and they would spend less time having their stomachs pumped and sitting around in public lavatories.

 

:lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...