JustinTimberlake Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 are you a centaur? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WorldBench Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 i'm missing a tooth. other than that, i don't ever get embarrassed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mauler5150 Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 I watch way too many action movies. i can recite the whole of Bloodsport, while watching it, word for word. can almost do the same with Commando. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtydoses Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 i watch the apprentice, and also re-watch past seasons. pnh. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WorldBench Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 i'm addicted to any cop shows i dunno why p.s i love you , what? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shaolinmasta Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 Earl's stories had me laughing Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
psudoname Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 fuck it im bored and i do alot of dumb drunk shit... like drink half a bottle of e and j brandy(the big one you know jug style) then tell my friend i would love to go to diner with her and her little bro who is in town and way too young to drink. every one orders food except me, I order shots and beer and im told a margarita which does not sound like me. when the food comes i spy my homies plate of chicken tacos and ask why i didnt get any food. he says he'll by me some cuz i already spent all my cash on booze. when my food gets there i'm too drunk to remember i ordered it and start yelling at the waiter that "i did't order any fuckin chicken tacos" her little bro looks very confused at this point. long story short. we leave. i hang my head out the window choking myself. then puke on some guys shoes as he gets out of the car next to me. i get draged in to my apt and my pant drag on the ground and then off my ass. i wake up but neked sitting on the pot, torso in the tub full of puke. stand up find my undies and rejoy the party in my apt. still in my undies. ahhh good times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stimme Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 I don't like girls with big breasts. Anything over a C is a no go. Co-signed!!.....I thought it was only me:huh: ....my friends be gettin at me(no/homo) constantly about that shit haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blood fart Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 This past Friday night I drank a ton. After my only meal of the day consisted of cold pills and a tofu hotdog. High Life all night. I went to pass out in my tent. I couldn't find it, so I sat in a field and sang to myself. I got up a few hours later and found my tent. Laid down. Then I had to pee. I couldn't figure out how to get out of the tent. 20 mintues of cursing the tent for being smarter than me, I decided the only thing I could do was destroy the tent. I sure wasn't going to stay trapped inside and piss my pants. So I ripped and dove my way through the tent. Peed and then went back to bed. Everyone made fun of me in the morning. Because I am such a wastoid I can't master using a zipper. One time I went to my bar after I had been drinking all day. I sat at the bar and odered a beer. They gave me three double shots of Kentucky Delux. I drank one. I drank the second. They both wanted to come back up. I was still sitting at the bar. The only thing I had time to do was turn away from the bar. And vomit hard. On some girl. Then I walked to the bathroom and finished vomiting. My baby brother had to ask me to leave. I was pretty red in the face the next time I went back. I lied and told them I had eaten some bad seafood. I don't even eat seafood. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frate_Raper Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 I like chubby older blondes with big tits i dont like i LOVE THEM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EGG Posted November 22, 2007 Share Posted November 22, 2007 i only dl milf porn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eatso Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i think 12oz is cool Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MOOGLE? Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i once pooped behind a ymca.. it wasnt closed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MOOGLE? Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 oh and today i watched 5 hours of a charmed marathon.. and didnt change the channel once Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleeping Pills Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i do things in my room that i would never do in public many many things Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toe Cutter Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 like what? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleeping Pills Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i don't even know where to start.. oontz festivals might be one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Toe Cutter Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 whats that? tell us more Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blood fart Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 I don't have a room of my own. But I do things all the time that people shouldn't do to themselves. And I have no qualms about telling people about it in social situations. My friends know more about the inner workings of my body then they probably care to know. When I was 11, my friend gave me a drink of Pepsi. I noticed it was warm, but didn't think much. I never drank sodas as a child, so I didn't know what was what. Turns out, there was pee pee in the Pepsi. Suicidal Tendencies never warned me about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 a girl beat me in a basketball game. all my friends were watching to, but this chick had a crazy crossover. after that i never played again. and i never stop hearing about it when we all get together and drink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CALIgula Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i lost a few games of pool to suki Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eliserx Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 age 17 or 18: so i'm at a show with some friends, and one of them sees this kid who (and i can't really remember what) did something disrespectful to my friend's girlfriend. so three of us decide to jump this kid. well, before we went to the show, we also went to taco bell and power drank old english 40's behind the club. so we go into the show, he sees the kid talking to some chick, and we roll up on him. i'm behind the other two (no/homo) walking up to the kid, and my friend says something to him. the kid gets all stupid, and we all move in on him. so my friend has the kid, and i throw in a punch. i hit the kid in the back (woo tough), then i back up, and when i swing in again, i fart uncontrollably. you know, one of those nervous moments when you're body says "i don't feel like i have to fart, but i'm just going to push it out with the force of 10 ford pistons." so instantly i think i shit my pants. without a blink of an eye, i drop my guard, and walk off to the bathroom holding my pants like i shit myself. luckily enough, i didn't shit my pants. unfortunately though, when i came back out, my friends were gone. they got bounced by security, and i'm standing there alone --looking like an idiot. everyone saw us jump this kid, and everyone saw me walk off like i shit my pants. so i instantly leave, my friends are outside, and they instantly are like "where the fuck did you go?" so i had to explain that i thought i shit my pants, and that's why i broke free. moral to this story: teenage angst is stupid. jumping the kid was just as stupid. thinking i shit myself and walking away from the fight --priceless. i was watching a friend of mine fight this guy who had beat his younger brother pretty bad. we used to all hang out as kids and i remember he always had to interupt tag, hide & seek, or house to go poo. so he's fighting this guy, hits him a few times in the face and then he just ups and leaves while the guy is down. we all stand there watching him walk off and see something fall out his pant leg. so we see what it is and it ends up being a turd. it was hilarious and everyone forgot that he pretty much whooped the guys ass, all they talked about was how he shit whilst doing so and left the evidence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtydoses Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 one time i went to a party where a friend of mine was going to college. i was 19 at the time, and immediately i meet this hippie chick at the party thru my friends girl. she is all into me, and i'm all into drugs, which she also had. anyways, we get wasted and i end up going home with her. we get to her place, all over each other, and i know i'm about to put her on smasharoo. so things are happening, surprisingly i didn't let my fingers diddle sex hole first, i just opted to go down on the girl, pants come off, panties come off, mind you its kinda dark in her room, only light coming from outside the room. well i get ready to go down on her, and literally bury my face into a MASSIVE BUSH. dude, i'm talking like, the biggest bush you have ever seen doubled and then doubled again. what was i to do? fuck i made the rookie mistake of not checking the waters before i decided to pull a cannonball into the deep end. to make a long story short, i went down on her for a few minutes, hair and all, thankfully she was ready to go and i just smashed the hairy hippie hole. she was actually pretty ok in bed, i ended up having to stay there since my boy was at his girls crib. i even woke up the next morning and hit that hairy shit one more time sober! WTF. after that i never really talked to her, and the next time i went to visit my friend, i brought a new girl with, which really made the hairy hippie mad! now to this day i can hardly fuck around with any vaginal hair. a little is ok, very very very little, anything more will send me into a flashback i'd rather not have. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DRUNKEN-ASSHOLE-ONER Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 one time i went to a party where a friend of mine was going to college. i was 19 at the time, and immediately i meet this hippie chick at the party thru my friends girl. she is all into me, and i'm all into drugs, which she also had. anyways, we get wasted and i end up going home with her. we get to her place, all over each other, and i know i'm about to put her on smasharoo. so things are happening, surprisingly i didn't let my fingers diddle sex hole first, i just opted to go down on the girl, pants come off, panties come off, mind you its kinda dark in her room, only light coming from outside the room. well i get ready to go down on her, and literally bury my face into a MASSIVE BUSH. dude, i'm talking like, the biggest bush you have ever seen doubled and then doubled again. what was i to do? fuck i made the rookie mistake of not checking the waters before i decided to pull a cannonball into the deep end. to make a long story short, i went down on her for a few minutes, hair and all, thankfully she was ready to go and i just smashed the hairy hippie hole. she was actually pretty ok in bed, i ended up having to stay there since my boy was at his girls crib. i even woke up the next morning and hit that hairy shit one more time sober! WTF. after that i never really talked to her, and the next time i went to visit my friend, i brought a new girl with, which really made the hairy hippie mad! now to this day i can hardly fuck around with any vaginal hair. a little is ok, very very very little, anything more will send me into a flashback i'd rather not have. I love a shaved puss just as much as the next guy, but it really cracks me up how phobic you youngbucks are of pubic hair. I mean, when I was coming up it was like a bonus to hook up with a bitch that shaved her twat. And it was pretty much expected to be hair down there. And that wasn't even that long ago. My how things changed in the past 10 years or so. :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dirtydoses Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 lol. true true. i'm no young buck tho, shit i might even be older than you!=D i use to not really care about hair, prolly from ages 16-18. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleeping Pills Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 whenever i'm on the mac that's downstairs (kinda like, right now) i always open photo booth and check myself out... someone video chat with me right now, that shit is always awkward and funny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deloner Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 Fuck me i had an Embarrassing moment tonight! Had all kinds of food at around 6 till 6:40 then at like 7:20 go to a homies * on the way there i said to myself damn i gotta shit imma bomb the dudes bathroom*. Get there drink 5 beers take a piss and as im pissing i fart and i pinch my piss like what the fuck did i just shit myself NAWWW im straight go back to the bonfire and im like what the fuck felt like i had a fart stuck in my ass cheeks so i go to the bathroom to give myself a safety whip and turns out i shit a little. hahahahhahah man i was at the bonfire for a good 15mins before i went to whipe thank god for the smoke smell. fuck i was embarrassed as fuck, then i got drunk. And this fat chick that goes to the homies house has been flirting with me lately so im gonna smash just to nut on her face. We where talking about all the hoes we have smashed and i wanted her to come back so bad just to fuck man im gonna do it this weekend unless something more attractive comes along. /drunkdudethatwantstofuckFATbitchtwoer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WORDISM45 Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 So it was the last day of high school and me and a bunch of mates were skulling goon (cask wine that costs like a dollar a litre i'm not sure if it's called goon anywhere except australia). Anyway we smash a few cones, a few beers, and a few casks at my mates house then we all decide to head to this other party that was on. On the way to the other party we stop at this park because one of my mates was so drunk that he had passed out on the ground. So we all just chill for a bit and we're all sittign around in a circle when suddenly my mate who we though had completely passed out just suddenly pulled his pants down. We all cracked up thinking it was completely random then like 30 seconds later dudes start looking at eachother and being like "what the fuck is that terrible smell" (it was pitch black at this park and you couldn;t see shit (no pun intended). SO anyway someone gets their mobile out and shines it on our mates arse and it turns out he has shat himself in front of about 15 people (dudes and chicks). His girlfriend was also there and she had to go to her car to get a t-shirt to wipe his arse with, she then, with the help of a few bold dudes, dragged him to someone front garden where she hosed his arse with their garden hose. He then gets chucked into the boot of her truck and she takes him back to hers and puts him in a bath. A bit later a few of us went over to hers and we checked up on him to make sure he wasn;t dead in the bath and the bath water has turned completely brown. we have only payed him out about this once or twice even though it happened like 3 years ago just because it was so fucking hilarious and embarassing for him that it seems too hectic to bring up as a lighthearted diss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T ReXXX Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 Im so hairy that when i shave my pubes it looks a donut hole of baldness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chubbs Posted November 23, 2007 Share Posted November 23, 2007 i got sick at church once and puked all over the row of people in front of me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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