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earl broclo ESQ

MY DRUNKEN DIET

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11-2am: (all doubles, very generous bartender)

 

2 captain and cokes

1 vanilla vodka and coke

1 margarita(80% liquor/ 1 splash of sour mix)

2 shots of jagermeister

1 bowl of weed

 

2am-3pm

 

3 taquitos from 7-11 that were 3 hours old (1 steak and colby jack/2 chicken and colby jack)

1 99cent bag of smokin' cheddar bbq doritos

1 bottle of poland springs

 

I'M GOING TO SHIT FUCKING BLOOD IN THE MORNING!

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a friend of mine is probly on the worst diet ever, oh well his ass wanted to get a 2007 Nissan Frontier now he has no money for food only for beer.

 

He will probly eat one meal a day and a minimum of 9 beers a night.

 

he shits liquid.

 

we have bets going on how much longer he is going to live. LOL

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the 7-11 shit is gonna end your life in a very painful/diarrheal way

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if you drank a lil more it woulod be team alco material for sure

 

one of my boys shit liquid for a month or more...dude only drank beer and shitty vodka...we dubbed him Twistoff Saucealot

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the 7-11 shit is gonna end your life in a very painful/diarrheal way

 

yup, i'm going to spend my whole morning at work shitting and reading magazines in my office --aka. the first floor handicap stall. nothing better than getting paid to shit and read interviews.

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so far you haven't had shit to drink

 

i get paid in booze to dj, and the bartender hooks me up --so each of those drinks puts hair on your chest. i'll agree with you though. obviously i'm not that shitfaced. i drove home, down a street that has more cops hanging out than the watts riots. i'm also pretty coherent to sit and type out messages that don't say shit like:

 

"ii bbe up on da hood wit da booooones"

 

sad part is, some ignorant fools type like that sober.

 

i just thought it'd be funny to see what other fuckers drink and eat, when they know they are going to regret it the next morning they wake up for work --in four hours.

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i get paid to skateboard

 

ok, that's better than getting paid to shit. at least i don't have to throw myself down a flight of stairs though. actually, i don't know what's worse? that or, the fact that the bathroom at my job has the cheapest toilet paper outside of pakistan.

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I have a fuckin horrible diet, and therefore it results in me having alot of times where I'm just pissing out of my ass the whole day

 

Last night I had a chicken quesadilla, some nachos with beans and sour cream, some cheese pizza, and alot of vodka with red drank

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CHEESE ON TOAST WITH KETCHUP/MAYONNAISE/MUSTARD SAUCE X100 = AWESOME.

DON'T DRINK THAT WINE.

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LIEK LAS NITE RITE. I TOLY 8 WENDYZ N STUFF DEN I PLAYED SUM VIDIO GAEMS N DRANK SUM MNTN DOO. SO LIEK I GUES U CULD SAY I HAB A BAD DEITS OR WATEVR.

 

HAY DUN BE FINKIN DAT U EET BAD FUDE WEN U SIT @ DE COMPUTER CUZ UR BURNIN N-R-G RUNIN AROUND ON COWNTA STRYK

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I don't think he was trying to impress you numbskulls. I'm pretty sure that his point was how the assortment of things he consumed was going to result in a hilariously unpleasant shitstorm.

 

Certainly not the worst thread I've seen on here lately.

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I have an amazing diet.

 

But I drink far too often.

 

Sweet ulcers though!

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I don't think he was trying to impress you numbskulls. I'm pretty sure that his point was how the assortment of things he consumed was going to result in a hilariously unpleasant shitstorm.

 

Certainly not the worst thread I've seen on here lately.

 

EXACTLY. i thought the whole idea of comparing nasty shit we put in our bodies, would be funny. after drinking what i drank, and smoking a bowl --it sounded funny at the time.

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i dont eat healthy enough to consider myself on a diet.

 

lately ive had WAY too much beer and ive eaten once a day.

 

by "eaten" i mean i microwaved a corn dog or a burger.... yea im scary skinny.

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My diet consists largely of water and cigarettes. Also, sandwiches, delicious sweets like homemade cookies, and pills. I'd probably be terribly thin except i have an odd habit of eating large meals shortly before i go to bed. My eating schedule is all sorts of fucked up

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last night...

 

8 - 16oz Budweisers

3 - 12oz Tecates

1 - 32oz Miller High Life

1 - Weed brownie

 

10 - Buffalo Chicken strips

1- jumbo jack (which I only took one bite out of)

 

and this morning... SHIT-TASTICAL !!!!!!!!

took about 3 craps before noone!

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WHOLE WHEAT

TURKEY

MUSTARD

AND BELL PEPPERS

I had like 8 BLP beats that i made way back that i went on a mad search for and could never find them again. They would've been instant classics. Samples of foghorns, cats, wavs of me, and more backwards beats.

 

11697243_l.gif

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last night...

 

8 - 16oz Budweisers

3 - 12oz Tecates

1 - 32oz Miller High Life

1 - Weed brownie

 

10 - Buffalo Chicken strips

1- jumbo jack (which I only took one bite out of)

 

and this morning... SHIT-TASTICAL !!!!!!!!

took about 3 craps before noone!

 

You eated my brownie??

 

They got rushed.

I got sad about the results.

Win some, lose some.

 

 

I shit blood on the daily.

It gives me street cred.

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