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Dear ________,


suca

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dear caliG,

 

sadly no... theres a vintage shop in my town that has one though.. owners are pretty cool and would be down to ship i think.

 

 

sincerely elis 6

 

 

 

 

 

p.s nigga turtz you missed out on free records.....y u no answer fb message when i say im in ur area.

 

 

p.s.s gate c17 nyc airport....german girl with leopard print spandex and dat ass.

must perveract photo somehow..

 

 

edit..

 

perveract mission aborted due to monolithic rectangular mustached woman blocking view and ranting about iced coffee

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Dear K....

Next week it will be a year since you left us... and this isn't getting any easier.

 

I know you're with me. I live this life believing that your face and embrace will be the first thing to welcome me to wherever the fuck I end up on the other side after this planet is done with me.

 

So. Many. Things. I want to tell you. You're the only thing missing right now...... Help me stay strong. I can feel you with me. I'm not asking for a miracle but help me stay strong. Please.....

 

I wish it didn't have to take the greatest loss of my life to realise the most valuable lesson I've ever learnt...

The value of pure and true love.

 

Yours forever

V xoxoxox

 

and in true cliche style......... the most cliche of cliche...... cliche.......

 

 

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dear erika from work,

 

you have the most amazing triple D's i've ever seen(contained and suffocated

under too many layers of nonsense in such hot weather). please for the love of god

just let'em out to breathe. just one suckle of air. allow me to motorfuckingboat them

shits then take another sip of my diet coke in a can like nothing happened. fuck.

BLAST YOU MALE INSTINCTS! BLAST YOU STRAIGHT TO LUCIFERS BASEMENT!

 

-noesy from titty-ville

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dear whomever,

 

why in the shit is this buying the right vehicle thing becoming such a pain?

should i give any fucks about the people downing my possible decisions??

probably not. tired of hearing it though. if i want to spend 4k on a 40 year old vw camper

2 months before my trip fuck you! eternal smh. facepalms galore. fuuU.

 

 

-frustrated noesy.

(note to self::should probably start move thread soon)

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Dear girl who wants me but doesn't WANT me,

 

You are a perfect combo of sexy and cute, with an intellect to match. You like baseball and raspas and drinking, and have a smile that melts my heart every time I make you laugh. Please make up your mind soon. I refuse to be friend-zoned by you.

 

-lovestruck in h-town

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Dear dentist lady,

You drilled into my head for 3 hours then gave me painkillers (so I kind of forgive you because they are really, really, really, reallyyyyyy reaalllyyyyyyy… nice), went home, had a nap, woke up and realised you capped the wrong tooth, bitch. And that’s a $1400 mistake.

 

We’ll talk...... (tomorrow afternoon in fact (because that’s when I have made the “you fucked up, take another look” appointment for)).

Be ready (for rational discussion, x-ray analysis (and perhaps another tooth capping session)).

B.

 

 

Dear me,

Vanity is an (expensive) motherfucker. Stop complaining. The porcelain veneers (after the braces) are going to look great so don’t yell at the dentist tomorrow.

You showed up hungover and slightly (maybe) still a little baked from the night before.

Maybe it IS your fault she fucked up. (Impossible but we’ll see…)

Manipulate the shit out of the situation and get it fixed (for free).

Bitch (lady) is gona be drilling your face once a week for the next 16 weeks so let’s all try and get along.

 

 

Dear everyone.

Fuck dentists. They’re the scariest people in the world and they get paid obscene amounts of money to make MISTAKES. I should have become a dentist.

I’m so scared.

 

 

 

 

Dear Nightmare... Gacy fuming.

 

 

Dear Marco... Sounds like she wants you.....!

Write her name on a wall and fuck her brains out... and, as crazy as it sounds - tell her how you feel... whats the worst that could happen? She'll be yours forever..

B

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Dear Oontz,

 

i never thought i'd be so happy to be logged in again.

was all bummed for the weekend with life stuffs. plus

being locked outta my escape zone was horseshit.

yesgayasfuck. but better then being visibly upset.

monday is a good day. and i have a surrious thread to make.

 

 

 

note to self:: prolly can't log in at home still.

fuck. hows to complete thread? steal computer??

or wait till tmrws break...?too many angles. should

have watched breaking bad last night. shoulda paid the

cable bill first. i need a diet coke in a can.

and some starburst. starburst are good. gotta make

a phone call to a guy about a van.

 

 

-noestrafuckingdimbus

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dear cali

re: doh thermos

 

that's tragic.

i had some cool toys that are pretty much all in the wind at this point

did manage to hang onto my schwinn mini-thrasher though.

 

!@#$%

 

 

 

 

 

dear interpretive dance,

 

suck it

 

!@#$%

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dear symbols,

 

i still have a bunch of my 80's toys...some he-man stuff, some hotwheels, some transformers stuff...i dont even know what happened to my dukes of hazzard thermos!...i still have my ALF lunchpail though from the 80s with the thermos, but its plastic :(

 

 

cG

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