Jump to content

Dear ________,


suca

Recommended Posts

dear place i interviewed at today,

 

LOL @ what you offered me as far as pay.

That's sad that you get away with paying your therapists that amount of money.

 

signed,

^ . ^

 

dear alliance bakery,

 

Thanks for the delicious cup of coffee. You guys are always the nicest when I stop in.

 

Love always,

catfaaaaze

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This forum is supported by the 12ozProphet Shop, so go buy a shirt and help support!
This forum is brought to you by the 12ozProphet Shop.
This forum is brought to you by the 12oz Shop.

dear smartass,

the side of the case says descriptive things like "ham water" and "cheese cultures" before it starts listing off cool little ingredients like "enzymes" and "maltodextrin" ... do you know what maltodextrin is? Theres also a lot of sodium phosphate, that sure sounds tasty!! but what exactly IS it?

extremely curious and trying not to take a personal shot at sherock,

the dark horse

Link to comment
Share on other sites

dear led zepplin

i'm suprised you are having a reunion concert. probably smart since bands like the stones are making mega millions. i have a feeling it won't be any good.

let me know,

mitch

 

Dear Mitch

Did you know they swore they'd never do a reunion tour cause the original drummer couldn't be with them? It's taken them a while, but they've finally sold out. Damn sell outs.

 

Yours sincerely,

Disillusioned fan.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

dear old japanese lady with tiny spoiled dog at cosco,

 

that was pretty damn funny when you took that parking stall from the girl that was waiting for like 15 minutes for the people in the stall to load up and leave. as soon as they left, you pulled right in, got out of the car, grabbed your little dog and walked away. ignoring the lady trying to get your attention. that was pretty damn funny, but not as funny as the pebble in the tire trick and the gum in your locks!!!

 

love,

 

the prick that happened to be parked next to you

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear sickness,

You are a piece of shit and I hope you go away soon. But you did get me out of work today which was supremely awesome. I am going to try drowning you out today with all kinds of cold medicine and hopefully get the well deserved sleep that I need.

Love,

The host keeping you alive.

 

p.s. I hope you got the lady sick....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Work,

 

Be good to me today. Dont let my boss bring up a problem that we already solved have my boss bug out make a big scene about it only to do exactly what me and the other guy on my team had done 3 hours before without telling anyone.

 

-Signed

Getting tired of my boss hoss...

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Kate @ the company we support,

 

You are supposedly really cute I dont remember when I bought you that drink at that show a while back it was dark. Thank you for brightening my day buy faxing your rush order over with hearts and smiley faces around my name you are teh awesomez...

 

-Signed

SomeJuan

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guest R@ndomH3ro

Dear Food Poisoning,

 

Thanks for stopping by and making anything that goes in my tummy come right back out. I also want to thank you for that trip to the Medics where I got all those IVs. I am so hungry right now, but why eat when I will just be seeing it later.

 

 

See you again in hell

 

-Sneak "Never should have ate that questionable food" Creep

Link to comment
Share on other sites

dear coworker who works with his mouth open,

 

 

my machine was down and i decided to hide while chainsmoking by your machine.

i dont understand how you can work flipping,smack,cutting,sanding,reaching into,pulling out,hammering, 2-5 hundred degree engine parts with your mouth open.

i get metal shit in my mouth just breathing through my nose.

 

 

sincerely the lazy black guy that always hocks loogies in the molten metal just to see it sizzle.

 

 

 

p.s

your breath smells like fermented grass

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...