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iloveboxcars

why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a shit

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i always check behind the shower curtain, even if i'm just going in there to brush my teeth..

 

since girls don't shit.

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

i just take a shit in the shower. that way i know i'm the only one in there

 

so you think...

FSRZINUEN5EP27YU9P.small.jpg

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i know . i check sometimes . just cause some serial killer couldve been behind there . or a dragon or some shit . back when i was three . christ just leave it open

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

i know . i check sometimes . just cause some serial killer couldve been behind there . or a dragon or some shit . back when i was three . christ just leave it open

 

 

 

 

i think that takes away the excitement for them. it's the thrill, man. the thrill.

 

 

EXTREME POOPING

 

 

447ioph.jpg

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I opted for a curtain with a clear vinyl panel that is eye-level.

Figuring it would kill my paranoia of a shower lurker.

But it didn't.

I still check.

Incase there might be a midget waiting to murder me.

Two types of people to never trust are midgets and blacks.

Bushwick Bill is basically the shadiest dude ever.

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

I opted for a curtain with a clear vinyl panel that is eye-level.

Figuring it would kill my paranoia of a shower lurker.

But it didn't.

I still check.

Incase there might be a midget waiting to murder me.

Two types of people to never trust are midgets and blacks.

Bushwick Bill is basically the shadiest dude ever.

 

 

you forget those little hispanic midgets.....oh, and indian midgets.....scurrry fehreal

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

i know . i check sometimes . just cause some serial killer couldve been behind there . or a dragon or some shit . back when i was three . christ just leave it open

 

yeah see. i realize its fucking rediculous. infact when i do it i am actually asking myself what the fuck i am looking for. it isnt that im scared of something being back there. i dont know.

 

it might just be habit now.

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

the midget in the shower thing killed me. i spilled sobe "energy citrus" on my sweater.

 

When I lived in a shed, I would always think midgets were hiding in there, waiting to kung fu me.

Little Asian midgets.

Because they were the only people that would be small enough to hide anywhere.

It would scare the shit out of me.

I wouldn't be able to go to sleep.

So I would lay in bed with a baseball bat and knife.

Waiting for the attack.

It never came.

 

I did alot of cocaine in those days.

It makes me a little embarassed now that I think about it.

But at the time, man was I terrified.

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Re: why do i feel the need to check behind the shower curtain every time im taking a

 

no worries bloodfarts. I have a basket full of ninja kitties for you.

 

Some real politically-correct feminazi chick was drinking at my place a few days ago.

She is a photographer for the weekly paper here.

She told me she could take all my old photos and fix them up for me.

I asked her if she could photoshop a waterfall of kittens behind me.

She said she would.

Then I got drunk and started saying nigger.

She doesn't want to be my friend anymore.

 

We were watching Full Metal Jacket.

She told us she couldn't watch it because it "put her in a bad place".

I told her we could watch Babe.

She thought I was being an asshole.

Probably because I was.

 

Either way.

Ninja kittens.

By the basket load.

Sounds like a dream come true.

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i'll photoshop a kitten farm behind your pics as soon as I become awesome at photoshop.

 

Promise.

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I do it.. It's a weird thing though... 'Cuz I have to get up from the throne to do it... Comedy I tell you... Then when I'm in the shower.. I check to see if someone comes in when I'm showering...

 

P.S. Best thread in the last week..

 

Fucking midgets.. Paranoid pooping.. True stories..

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I have the sliding clear doors in my shower, so no need to do the double check.

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I couldn't have the sliding glass.. I'm sure in one of my altered states I'd crash through that shit.. Not fun I'm guessing..

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I just thought of something.. But nevermind.. Okay.. Has anyone gotten a blow job while pooping??

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When I first started driving I'd always check the back seat before I got in the car because of that urban legend with the knife flashing in the rear-view mirror. But checking behind the shower curtain? That shit's for pussies!

 

 

And I love those claw-feet tubs, I want to move into a place that has them. My family moved into this old Victorian house when I was 5 and the bathroom there had one of those tubs, but it was all rusted out and the whole bathroom was a disaster-zone, had to re-do the whole thing and the tub went with it. That house used to scare the bejesus out of me when I was little.

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