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Lies Adults Told Me As A Child....


Gunm

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When I was in 1st grade I came home from school and my parents told me that the familly dog "fluffy" was too old to live with us so they took it to a farm for old dogs. I beleived this for a really long time and eventually forgot all about it. Then about 20 years later I'm getting drunk with my mom talking about old times and shit and I remembered the dog and what they told me and I'm like Huh? Mom, what did yous mean by the dog had to go to a farm??? And she's like "Oh silly, there was no farm. Fluffy bit your sister so your dad took her out back and shot her".

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If you cut off a cats whiskers it will fuck up it sense of balance.

 

That is true with most cats.

 

I got that "eyes turning square from sitting too close to the tellie" shit. I really wasn't bothered if they did though. My uncle told me the massive smoke stacks at a factory was a cloud maker, dunno why i still remember that so well. When i think about it adults told a shit load of lies to me when i was young. Sons of bitches.

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I was always told that, "If you play with fire, you will wet the bed."

 

Also, my grandpa used to have a ranch, and he'd hunt deer. We were up there staying at the ranch one xmas holiday, and he had killed a deer. Well, he had it all cut open down the middle and airing out hanging from a tree. He came and got me and my cousins, we were probably 7-9 years old, and he told us it was rudolph that he killed and xmas wasn't going to come this year. We cried, and my grandma got mad at him.

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I was always told that, "If you play with fire, you will wet the bed."

 

Also, my grandpa used to have a ranch, and he'd hunt deer. We were up there staying at the ranch one xmas holiday, and he had killed a deer. Well, he had it all cut open down the middle and airing out hanging from a tree. He came and got me and my cousins, we were probably 7-9 years old, and he told us it was rudolph that he killed and xmas wasn't going to come this year. We cried, and my grandma got mad at him.

 

 

your grandpa is a drunk...hahaha thats awesome!

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I'm not sure where I heard it from, but I remember when I was a kid that someone told me that jacking off to much would lead to hairy palms.....LIARS!!!

 

all it does is give you smelly palms.

 

when i was younger my extended family pretended to like me. my inside source (my cousin) would always tell me how much shit they'd talk about me when i wasn't around. and that they'd tell him not to turn out like me. :cool:

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damn your mom sucked!

 

My mom said I was going to get a Go-Kart for my bertdai kept building and building it up all my friends new my b day rolled around...no dice...so i killed her...

 

 

 

its kinda crazy you said this. makes me think of a kid i once met. this stories a little off topic, but i suppose it has to do with parents lying.

He asked his parents for a dirtbike for christmas and begged and begged. Christmas rolls around and he looks around. no bike. fuckin psycho kills his mother, kills his father and proceeds to hide the bodies in the garage where sure enough... is a brand new dirtbike.

no moral, true story.

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it had to have been like 5 years back or more. im 21 now, i was 16 then. im not sure how long he was there before i came. ill try and find it but i dont know what city he was from. i wanna say boston, but im not sure. this place held kids from all over the state. it was like a max unit for juveniles down in plymouth. anybody around my age who did time there would remember the story. not for nothing, but ive met a lotttt of fuckin sick puppies in my time down. i did a shitload of juvie time, and when i was turning 18 on my first county bid i ended up going to a state hospital (bridgewater) for criminally insane people. helluva time. btw, im not insane. it was a stunt to break up the bid a little.

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i did a shitload of juvie time, and when i was turning 18 on my first county bid i ended up going to a state hospital (bridgewater) for criminally insane people. helluva time. btw, im not insane. it was a stunt to break up the bid a little.

 

Nice try!!! Courts don't give "Criminally Insane" hospital stays to minors. Even if you were 18 when they sent you, you would have had to serve your full sentence. They don't give "good time" to nutbags. SOOOOO, what color was the dirt bike you found in the garage.

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Mom said:

"you miss school and the police will come and take you from me"

"swallow that gum and it'll stay in you for seven years"

"don't buckle your seat belt and the police will come and take you from me"

"hit your borther again and it will make him grow up to be twice your size and will hit you back"

 

and then a bunch of stuff about guygod.

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