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HAL

City Livin'

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Living in my little city is cool and all, until today.

 

I got out of work, I'm on my way home, and the usual route i take is blocked off. Oh ok, some kind of accident probably. Some kids whiling out or some shit. That corner market is always having some kind of problem. Who knows.

 

I drive down the street and all the roads are closed. What the fuck. Orange cones blocking off the righthand lane. I cannot get to my street. As it turns out, there's a fucking road race going on. I stop my car and ask a cop if I can get through.

 

"Hey man, I live on ***** Street, can i get through?"

 

"THE ROAD IS CLOSED, GUY. YA HEAH?"

 

"Yeah but dude, I just need to pop through that traffic tape and my house is right there (pointing at my house)."

 

"THE ROAD IS FAHKIN CLOSED! DINCHA HEAH ME?"

 

"Awright dude, I'm just trying to get home after a long ass day."

 

"AHHH YA FAHCKIN DEAF? tHE ROAD IS CLOOOOSED!"

 

"Ok, dude. Go fuck yourself."

 

"GET THE FAHHCK OTTA THE CAH, YOU BAHSTAD! IMMA TICKET YA FAH DISAHHDAHHLY CONDUCT."

 

"Because i can't get home after a 10 hour workday? Eat shit! YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING GOON, ASSHOLE. (hitting the gas)"

 

So I had to pay to park in a garage at the end of my street, and walk fucking home, up a goddam hill. Fuck this town. Fuck your couch. Fuck the po-leese.

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hahahaha.... fuck your couch!

 

people dont become cops because of their attentive listening skills

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i just loled in my pants

 

That's the MeisterBrau talkin'...

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"GET THE FAHHCK OTTA THE CAH, YOU BAHSTAD! IMMA TICKET YA FAH DISAHHDAHHLY CONDUCT."

 

 

 

ahaha..i love it

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how about this.... some punk kids just ripped my girl's bike off the front porch.

I rode over to the punk kid hangout and saw two kids that sounded about right doubling on another stolen bike.

 

joyriding on shit bikes? I cant wait until they grow up and start robbing stores!

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I should have done that.

 

if it was my bike that got stolen I would have gone swinging a yard of chain with a bolt lock on the end.

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police shot and killed a man down the street from my house last weekend

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I'm gonna be hitting up some more waterfalls and rivers tomorrow.

 

 

LAA-DEE-DAAAAA!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[/jealous]

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