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defyoner

i hate snakes..

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so i go to my garage this morning.. and my roomate is like, dude.. theres a snake behind the box. i was like orly? he was like ya rly. so any who it was a decent size fucker. about a good 3 feet long. so we get in the car, i take the roomate to the airport i come home and the fucker is gone. no where in site, now im freakin out because im thinking this douchebag snake is in my house.. but thats me being paranoid. from the looks of the photos ive found online theres 2 options of what kinda snake it is.. and worst option is that its an Eastern Diamond Back.. thats me being paranoid again though. other option i already forgot..

 

who wants to come over and hunt this fucker down.. i need me a new belt.

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it's probably in your bed dude...

 

 

don't worry. I'll come over and slay the snake.

 

harhar.

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Just walk around witha broom stick and tap it on the floor like a blind man as you walk.

 

do these fuckers really respond to that?

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do these fuckers really respond to that?

 

of course! all snake slaying myths are in fact, truth

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do these fuckers really respond to that?

 

 

Yea. They dont hear so they go by vibration. They can feel it coming rather than hear it.

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call an exterminator. or just buy an anti-venom serum just in case.

 

i was stick & pickin on the highway a few months back and this dude stepped on a strip of rubber which then hissed at him. he jumped about 3 feet, narrowly avoiding a mac truck and we saw it was either a black racer or a water moccasin. (an all black 3 foot long sinister looking fucker) anyway, my idea was to pick it up with the stick and put it in the van next to the c.o. but they were all freaked out about having it in the van with us.

about a week later we were going down rt. 128 and up on these ricks there were like 40 of them fuckers all crawling around and basking in the sun. i still dont know what kind they were though?

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put your speakers on the floor and pump the james earl jones

or whoever that nigga was on the simpsons whacking day episode

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Im pretty sure if you just play Mike Jones' songs the snake will be so fucking angry it'll leave.

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Guest spectr

snakes are great, out of all the ways to die getting eaten by a snake doesnt seem all that bad so your on your own defy

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