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Stephen Colbert On C-SPAN


Thought Wrong

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"Washington D.C., the chocolate city with the marshmallow center... and graham cracker crust of corruption."

 

"rearranging deck chairs on the titanic? this administration is soaring. if anything, it's rearranging deck chairs on the hindenburg."

 

:) :) :)

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"Jesse Jackson... You can ask him anything, but he's going to say what he wants, at the pace that he wants. It's like boxing a glacier. Enjoy that metaphor, by the way, because your grandchildren will have no idea what a glacier is."

 

talking to the press...

"Over the last five years, you people were so good -- over tax cuts, WMD intelligence, the effect of global warming. We Americans didn't want to know, and you had the courtesy not to try to find out....

 

Here's how it works: the president makes decisions. He's the decider. The press secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Put them through a spell check and go home. Get to know your family again. Make love to your wife. Write that novel you got kicking around in your head. You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the administration. You know - fiction."

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