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email this posting to a friend chicago craigslist > city of chicago > events

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6/14-6/28: Street Art / Graffiti Classes! (Chicago)

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reply to: event-6papf-1214261201@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Date: 2009-06-10, 1:46AM CDT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

From the people who brought you Breakdance Chicago and HouseDance Chicago, we now present...

 

URBAN ART CHICAGO

 

Classes Are Taught By Local Art Legend Revise CMW

 

 

 

We teach beginners the basics of all things Street Art. This will include spray can control, design, lettering, stenciling, marker art, and more! Perfect for art students or people who want a unique take on art! This type of course cannot be found in any art school!

 

Go to http://www.urbanartchicago.com For More Info!

New Classes Start June 14th!

Free Your Mind, And Your Art Will Follow

 

 

Location: Chicago

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

 

 

PostingID: 1214261201

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Actor needed for emotional role – One day high pay

 

My deceased aunt gave my two kids a Cocker Spaniel a few months back. The dog has been a terror and become overwhelming for me. I am a single father raising two young children. I cannot face telling the kids that the dog must go. I have found a good home for the dog, and just need someone to transport the dog, and play the villain.

 

Premise: You will be the dog walker hired by daddy (me) to walk Skittles. I will introduce you to the kids, and you will tell them you are going to help Skittles get her exercise when Daddy is too busy to walk her. At that point you will walk Skittles to your car and take her to her new family 20 minutes from my place. Then return holding just a leash. The story will be that Skittles broke free of the leash and took off. At this point prepare for crying, things being thrown at you, and possibly cursing. My kids are young and dramatic, their girls.

 

Pay will be $500. The job will take roughly 2 hours at best.

 

This job is ideal for an actor looking to diversify their role base, or someone who genuinely likes to make children cry. Acting experience is a plus, but not necessary. Please inform me of any prior experience in this kind of situation.

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email this posting to a friend chicago craigslist > city of chicago > events

please flag with care:

 

 

miscategorized

 

 

prohibited

 

 

spam/overpost

 

 

best of craigslist

 

6/14-6/28: Street Art / Graffiti Classes! (Chicago)

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reply to: event-6papf-1214261201@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Date: 2009-06-10, 1:46AM CDT

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

From the people who brought you Breakdance Chicago and HouseDance Chicago, we now present...

 

URBAN ART CHICAGO

 

Classes Are Taught By Local Art Legend Revise CMW

 

 

 

We teach beginners the basics of all things Street Art. This will include spray can control, design, lettering, stenciling, marker art, and more! Perfect for art students or people who want a unique take on art! This type of course cannot be found in any art school!

 

Go to http://www.urbanartchicago.com For More Info!

New Classes Start June 14th!

Free Your Mind, And Your Art Will Follow

 

 

Location: Chicago

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

 

 

PostingID: 1214261201

 

Actually, Revise is a very well known and respected Chicago artist...I'm going to take a wild guess and say that these classes are made available via grant dollars or some non-profit....either way, he's giving back to the community and I'd rather have someone like that in my city than some elitist pretentious asshole.

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hahahhahahahaha:

 

 

Bug-themed Party

Posted at: 2009-06-09 01:08:22

Original ad:

We are hosting a 5th birthday party for our son and his friends. It`s a "bug themed" party and we`re looking to hire someone who can bring a few bugs/spiders (maybe under glass?) to the party and educate the kids for about 20 minutes (we`re talking 5-year old attention span). The party is at the end of June. Please contact me if you have experience with and access to bugs and can create a fun learning experience for the kids.

Timmy Tucker to ****************@**********.org

 

Hey there,

 

I have access to about twenty black widow spiders, and about 50 brown recluse spiders. For $200, I can release them at your party, and everyone can enjoy them. They are great for kids! I know a lot about insects from my job. I worked in an office on the first floor that had cheap windows, so I always had to kill bugs. I can tell you how to kill anything from a stink bug to an African burrowing scorpion. I can give a small speech to your party about this.

 

Also, for an extra $50, I can release a bag of wasps in your house to really give it that insect theme that you are looking for.

 

I look forward to hearing from you,

 

Tim

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Original ad:

I am trying to get 2 tickets to the Nationals vs. Red Sox on Thursday, June 25th. I'm willing to pay up to $40.

From Mike Partlow to **********@**********.org

 

Hello, I do not have tickets to the Nationals, but I do have a video tape of my 7-year-old's little league team game last week. He plays for the Arby's Allstars, and they beat the Smith Hardware Little Leaguers. I am sure it will be way more entertaining than watching the Nationals get their ass whooped for the 49th time this season.

 

From austin ******* to Me

 

Fuck yourself, asshole.

 

From Mike Partlow to austin *******

 

Austin, my 7-year-old son was on the computer and he read your very offensive e-mail. Now he is going around telling everyone to "fuck themselves." Me and my wife tried to raise him to be a kid who doesn't curse, but thanks to your profanity, he thinks it is okay. I demand an apology from you.

 

From austin ******* to Me

 

You want my apology? Go fuck yourself.

 

From Mike Partlow to austin *******

 

I did have the tickets; I was just messing around with you. They were good seats - 10 rows back from third base. I was going to sell them both for $30. I would rather burn them, however, if you don't apologize. If you do apologize, the tickets will be yours.

 

From Mike Partlow to austin *******

 

I'm waiting...

 

From austin ******* to Me

 

I'm sorry about your kid.

 

From Mike Partlow to austin *******

 

Hah, what a sucker. I made you look like little bitch in front of my 7-year-old son. I don't actually have any tickets. Thanks for helping me teach my son a lesson about how not to keep your dignity.

 

Mike

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Original ad:

2007 Cadillac Escalade for sale - 38,000 miles. Great condition! Asking $40,000. E-mail if interested.

From Mike Partlow to **************@*********.org

 

Hey,

 

I have a proposition for you. I will give you $50 if you let me borrow your Escalade for tomorrow night. I have been trying to get a date with this girl, but the only way I was able to get her to go on a date with me was by telling her that I am a very rich and powerful drug dealer. The problem is, I am not a drug dealer, and I actually drive a 91 Honda Accord. She will know I am lying if I pick her up in that. The only chance I have of getting with this chick is if I roll up in your ballin Escalade. If you let me borrow it, on top of giving you $50, I will put a few gallons of gas in it. I promise we will not have sex on your seats.

 

Please help me out!

 

Mike

 

From James ******* to Me

 

Absolutely not. The car is not for rent!

 

From Mike Partlow to James ********

 

James,

 

I am willing to pay you up to $60 to borrow your Escalade. If you are worried about me messing it up, you can ride with me. In fact, you can drive it. I'll tell her you are my bodyguard. That would actually work out better, I think. Do you look like a bodyguard? You'd have to wear a suit, and possibly one of those earpieces with the coiled cord running down your neck. You should occasionally touch the earpiece to your ear, like you are listening to some badass security chatter. You shouldn't talk have to talk much, just drive and look badass.

 

Please reconsider my offer.

 

Mike

 

From James ******** to Me

 

No. That is stupid. Maybe you should try asking out a woman that isn't a materialistic gold digger.

 

From Mike Partlow to James *********

 

Golddigger or not, this girl's rack is phenominal. Tell you what, if you consider my offer and I end up getting laid, I will try to snap a picture of her tits with my cellphone and send it to you. Trust me, they are great.

 

Mike

 

From James ******** to Me

 

Shut up. You aren't borrowing my car.

 

From Mike Partlow to James *********

 

Well James, you are being a cockblocker. I hope next time you are trying to get your D wet, you get the shit cockblocked out of you.

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hahahahahahah

 

 

Original ad:

WE PAY TO CUT YOUR HAIR!

We are a hair styling school that is looking for volunteers to get their hair styled/dyed by our students. We will pay you up to $50. Preferably women/girls

From Mike Anderson to *********@*********.org

 

Hey! I saw your ad saying you will pay cash to cut my hair! Well I just got my head shaved, but I haven't trimmed my pubes in about five months. They are pretty gnarly, and I jammed my beard trimmer trying to cut them earlier. How much would you pay me to trim my pubes?

 

Mike

 

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

 

Mike,

 

Sorry but we do not trim pubic hair. This is more of a hair dying and styling place.

 

Thanks!

 

From Mike Anderson to *********@yahoo.com

 

That works for me too. My pubes are very curly, but I've always wanted to get them straightened. Would you be able to do that? Maybe you could put some highlights in, and just shape up my split ends. Also, do you have some kind of conditioner that would take care of my crabs problem? My prescription ointment doesn't really do the job.

 

Where are you located? I am free all day tomorrow.

 

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

 

Mike we work on HEADS ONLY. SORRY.

 

From Mike Anderson to *********@yahoo.com

 

Here's what I am willing to do. You style my pubes, and I'll accept $40 cash instead of $50. You can even donate my pubes to those people with cancer who need hair, if you want.

 

From *********@yahoo.com to Mike Anderson

 

NO. That is disgusting. Leave us alone!

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Actor needed for emotional role – One day high pay

 

My deceased aunt gave my two kids a Cocker Spaniel a few months back. The dog has been a terror and become overwhelming for me. I am a single father raising two young children. I cannot face telling the kids that the dog must go. I have found a good home for the dog, and just need someone to transport the dog, and play the villain.

 

Premise: You will be the dog walker hired by daddy (me) to walk Skittles. I will introduce you to the kids, and you will tell them you are going to help Skittles get her exercise when Daddy is too busy to walk her. At that point you will walk Skittles to your car and take her to her new family 20 minutes from my place. Then return holding just a leash. The story will be that Skittles broke free of the leash and took off. At this point prepare for crying, things being thrown at you, and possibly cursing. My kids are young and dramatic, their girls.

 

Pay will be $500. The job will take roughly 2 hours at best.

 

This job is ideal for an actor looking to diversify their role base, or someone who genuinely likes to make children cry. Acting experience is a plus, but not necessary. Please inform me of any prior experience in this kind of situation.

 

If this was true it would sweet

 

$500 for doing shit all

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Original ad:

litter of 6 kittens up for adoption! they are all 3 weeks old and are looking for a good home. contact if interested.

From Mike Hunt to *********@***********.org

 

Hi,

 

I am interested in taking all six kittens off of your hands. How much do you want for them?

 

Mike

 

From Shannon ******* to Me

 

Mike,

 

Are you going to take care of all of these kittens? I want to make sure they all find a good home, and was expecting to sell them one at a time. Are you able to house all six of them?

 

From Mike Hunt to Shannon *******

 

Shannon,

 

To be honest, I own a pet Bengal Tiger and he is on a strict diet of cats. I usually feed him one cat every couple of days, so this litter should hold him over for a while. Don't worry though, I'll take good care of the kittens until I feed them to him.

 

Mike

 

 

 

From Shannon ******* to Me

 

That is horrible! You will not get a single kitten from me. I really hope you are not serious.

 

From Mike Hunt to Shannon *******

 

Shannon,

 

I was kidding. I seriously need all six kittens though. Disregard anything I said about a tiger.

 

From Shannon ******* to Me

 

NO.

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Reply to: pers-jrjqe-1208636296@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

Date: 2009-06-06, 3:12PM EDT

 

 

I have several fantasies that I want fulfilled that are listed below. Tell me how you will fulfill them and I will get back with you on how we can make it happen! Please be very descriptive

I am a swm, 5'10", muscular build and drug and disease free. You be as well. Thanks

 

1st fantasy- I want someone to come to my house while I am sleeping at night come into my home(door will be unlocked for you) and crawl into bed with me and start making love to me, all the while I think that you are my girlfriend only to wake up and discover that you are my daughter home from college.

 

2nd - I want you be a babysitter at my house. I am a single parent who you are attracted to and I have been ignoring your hot young body so you decide to seduce me.

 

3rd - I would like for you and your girlfriend to be my bi-sexual co-workers and decide to show me how pleasant an uninhibited threesome can be. You both come over to my house under the ruse of getting some material for work, but then start executing your seduction of me.

 

4th - I would like you to be my maid and my wife has to go out of town and you are hornier than all get out so late at night while I’m in the shower you come in and want to have your way with me and start your seduction finding that I have wanted you all along.

 

 

 

* Location: West End

* it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

 

image 1208636296-0

 

PostingID: 1208636296

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honestly i feel for the guy. ever try taking a picture of yourself with a camera phone? now try being puerto rican... see? almost impossible.

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