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Poop Man Bob

Police sketches

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Ever since I was young and my sister and I would watch Unsolved Mysteries (9 pm, Wednesday nights), police sketches have interested me. And freaked me out a little bit, at least then - although I suspect Robert Stack's voice had something to do with that. Regardless, the combination of the Unsolved Mysteries theme music and a composite sketch will likely make me pee my pants a little even to this day. I was convinced that right when the show went to commercial, someone vaguely resembling the police sketch would start banging on the windows right near the TV while screaming wildly, even if the fugitive was wanted for something stupid like forgery or drug smuggling.

 

The sketches always end up looking like some strange humanoid-type thing. Take, for example, this:

 

_41309464_efit203.jpg

 

The placement of the facial features makes me think of a Mr. Potato Head Hitler with a blond wig. I found that sketch in a recent BBC news article, which, coincidentally, was about how the witness was unhappy with the police sketch, saying, "I don't think I've ever seen anyone who looks like that in Stalham or anywhere else in my life."

 

When you do a Google Image search for "police sketch," you come across some real winners:

 

0221cold-autosized141.jpg

 

m918zj23.gif

 

6-5-00kidnap_story.jpg

 

020427jahi_woman.jpg

 

feature.3.gif

 

08SUSPECT,0.jpg

It's nice to see they give 9-year olds a chance to work at the police station drawing pictures.

 

 

040625_suspect.jpg

 

community.200x245.jpg

 

jerk_narrowweb__200x256.jpg

Seriously. Imagine waking up in the middle of the night and having any of these last three standing next to your bed staring at you.

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Guest imported_Tesseract

and people thought basquiat was quite the artist...

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hardy har

to that last one....

that... alien.... huge dome ..

havin... boy somthin..

 

scariest thing about unsolved

mysteries to me was the

intro music.....no.... no It

was that mans voice....

coulda been the stupidest non scary

who gives a shit mystery...

yett that dude had a way of

makin it creepy as shit...

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I always like the updates that they put on the reruns.

 

You know, so you don't worry about the killer/vandal/missing kid anymore.

 

 

As if I ever did.

 

-fuse.

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Guest Sparoism

_41309464_efit203.jpg

 

AKA Dirty Sanchez or Blondie Raccoon.

 

He looks like he fell asleep at the beach wearing a diving mask.

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Guest Sparoism

Yeah, that too.

 

Those programs they use distort the image and make everyone look like a Mongoloid.

 

Criminals are getting away with all sorts of dastardly deeds because of this. There should be an inquiry, I say.

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Originally posted by Poop Man Bob@Feb 14 2006, 04:43 PM

jerk_narrowweb__200x256.jpg

 

This guy looks wwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrrrddddddddd!!!!!!!

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haha.

 

oh man...I don't know if I should post this or not...eh...wtf...

unknown fact about steveaustin #45836

I once got paid to help the police to do a facial reconstruction of a murder victim in photoshop. The guy was beaten so badly he was completely unrecognizeable.

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Well Im glad someone else remembers how influential Robert Stack's voice was. He was great. I used to watch that show just for his voice. That and rescue 911 with Shatner.

 

Yeah.

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Yeah, Robert Stack had the scariest voice ever. That show was so freaky when they went into that supernatural stuff.

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Originally posted by SteveAustin@Feb 14 2006, 12:14 PM

haha.

 

oh man...I don't know if I should post this or not...eh...wtf...

unknown fact about steveaustin #45836

I once got paid to help the police to do a facial reconstruction of a murder victim in photoshop. The guy was beaten so badly he was completely unrecognizeable.

 

You HAVE to post the image. If needed, black-box out the eyes or something.

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