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TuffGuy

BUM WINES

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i was bored the other night and stumbled on this site http://www.bumwine.com/ its a small site but the discriptions of these wines had me cracking the fuck up. imma be taking a trip to the states pretty soon, and hopefully will be enoying some of these drinks. anyone have any good stories about fucking with this shit?

 

 

"A convenience store clerk in Show Low, AZ once told me that only the oldest of stumbling indian drunks from the reservation buy Thunderbird. Avaliable in 750 mL and a devastating 50 oz jug"

 

"Anyways, if your taste buds are shot, and you need to get trashed with a quickness, then "T-bird" is the drink for you. Or, if you like to smell your hand after pumping gas, look no further than Thunderbird. As you drink on, the bird soars higher while you sink lower."

 

i gotta cop some of this

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Oh man, lookin' at that site reminds me of being 17 and willing to drink anything with alcohol. I used to drink a lot of that stuff, but Night Train...oh man....that shit will definetely fuck you up with the quickness. I have a really high tolerance and drink mostlly tequila and whiskey, but the one time I drank Night Train I spent the entire night falling on my face, puking and crying like a little girl. Never again will I touch that stuff. Shit...just looking at a picture of a bottle of it makes me want to burst into tears.

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been there done that. ive tried all of those during my days of drinking. my favorite by far is cisco cuz it puts me on my ass and gets me drunk enough to try to pick fights. usually makes for some good stories.

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I tried to do cisco a few months ago and couldnt. I couldnt drink it. I have had my way with mad dog quite a few times when i was younger.

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It may be the 37th time it's been posted, but It's the first time I've seen it.

 

Funniest thing I've read in a while

 

I'm gettin Cisco'd tonight!!

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Originally posted by Flavicon@Dec 19 2005, 09:57 PM

It may be the 37th time it's been posted, but It's the first time I've seen it.

 

Funniest thing I've read in a while

 

I'm gettin Cisco'd tonight!!

 

 

good luck!

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CISCO IS WASSUP. THE REST OF THAT SHIT IS FOR CRACKHEADS MY DUDE. ANYTHING THAT GETS A CRACKHEAD FUCKED UP ENOUGH TO FORGET ABOUT CRACK FOR A WHOLE NIGHT IS SOME REAL DANGEROUS SHIT. I SEEN A DOPE FIEND SHOOTIN UP IN MARCUS GARVEY PARK AND THE NIGGA HAD 3 CANS LEFT OF A NIGHTTRAIN 6PACK. THE MOTHAFUCKA WAS FALLING OVER AND I WALKED PAST THE NIGGA LIKE "FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU B?" NIGGA SAID "DATTRAAAIN*COUGH*HEHEHE" NIGGA WAS TYIN UP WITH FISHING LINE, HE WASNT EVEN DOPED UP YET AND HE WAS SMASHED OFF THREE CANS OF NIGHT TRAIN. THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS DONT FUCK WITH NIGHT TRAIN. AND IF YOU GO TO SOMEONE CRIB AND THEY GOT THAT IN THE FRIDGE OR ANYWHERE, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. CUZ THATS A SURE SIGN NIGGAS ARE SMOKING JUMS OR SHOOTIN HERON BUNDLES.

 

 

 

 

 

MERO GEE

MLB TEAM

NETWORK

THRU DA

LABELSSS

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Guest Sparoism
Originally posted by MEROJUANA@Dec 19 2005, 05:37 PM

CISCO IS WASSUP. THE REST OF THAT SHIT IS FOR CRACKHEADS MY DUDE. ANYTHING THAT GETS A CRACKHEAD FUCKED UP ENOUGH TO FORGET ABOUT CRACK FOR A WHOLE NIGHT IS SOME REAL DANGEROUS SHIT. I SEEN A DOPE FIEND SHOOTIN UP IN MARCUS GARVEY PARK AND THE NIGGA HAD 3 CANS LEFT OF A NIGHTTRAIN 6PACK. THE MOTHAFUCKA WAS FALLING OVER AND I WALKED PAST THE NIGGA LIKE "FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU B?" NIGGA SAID "DATTRAAAIN*COUGH*HEHEHE" NIGGA WAS TYIN UP WITH FISHING LINE, HE WASNT EVEN DOPED UP YET AND HE WAS SMASHED OFF THREE CANS OF NIGHT TRAIN. THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS DONT FUCK WITH NIGHT TRAIN. AND IF YOU GO TO SOMEONE CRIB AND THEY GOT THAT IN THE FRIDGE OR ANYWHERE, LEAVE IMMEDIATELY. CUZ THATS A SURE SIGN NIGGAS ARE SMOKING JUMS OR SHOOTIN HERON BUNDLES.

 

 

 

 

 

MERO GEE

MLB TEAM

NETWORK

THRU DA

LABELSSS

 

Absolute TRUTH. I will fuck with all of the above, however. I have also fucked with crack, heroin, and all of their friends and family, and nothing- NOTHING- can compare to drinking $5 worth of Night Train, except maybe mainlining cocaine or smoking dust. And those are two things I'll never do...again. But Train? ALWAYS...under the right circumstances, and treated with respect, it is a formidable weapon in my Arsenal Of Inebriants. My world is a more interesting (and surely worse) place from some trips I took on the Train.

 

What's the word? Thunderbird. What's the price? Fitty twice. Riding the Thunderchicken is similar, but since I am not a white wine guy I'll pick the Train, thank you. Damn, I'm thinking about getting a short dog right now...

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Originally posted by BROWNer@Nov 11 2003, 12:13 AM

shitbag-wine.jpgShitbag Wine

 

Shitbag Wine is a casual budget red for the constantly mobile. The unbreakable plastic bottle is a boon to those who slip and fall often. And the unique nipple top lets the wine through when you squeeze, but keeps it in when you knock over the bottle, or throw it against a wall in a fit of sweaty rage.

 

Shitbag's bouquet is complex if not delicate, with dense aromas of thistleberry and fish, and a touch of lead from the barrel aging. The wine carries a strong smoke feel and has an almost overpowering finish.

 

Shitbag Wine. The wine of choice for the downwardly mobile.

 

 

 

chateaudushitbag.jpgChateau du Shitbag

 

So you're off the streets. But you miss the sound of the trains, the feel of vermin against your cheek, the smell of fresh morning vomit. You yearn for a simple, dangerous life. Now you've got Chateau du Shitbag.

 

Or: you're still down on your luck, but miraculously a benevolent stranger has asked you to dinner. A whole new world could be opening to you, if you impress, if you show distinction. If you bring along a bottle of Chateau du Shitbag.

 

No matter your lot in life, Chateau du Shitbag rewards the pallette munificently. Luxurious dark berry, peanuts, cassis, and vodka with firm tannins. Only the slightest hint of lead. Sir Lawrence Shitbag's signature Merlot is a classic choice for upscale transients worldwide.

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