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real Christmas shopping


John Birch

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holla

in a thread like this, it pays to keep the IQ level as low as possible.

 

 

yknow what i also want?

 

i read once about a small village in southeast asia

people there apparently believed that the U.S. is so rich

we have ATMs here that just dispense money.

as in, no PIN, no account, just go get money

 

i want one of those too.

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I want a bottle of cologne. That isn't gonna happen. I also want a new computer, but ain't gonna happen, neither. I may luck out and a special someone may buy me a bottle of scotch, though.

 

What I REALLY want is what Steve Martin wants:

 

If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season, it would be that all the children to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace.

 

If I had two wishes I could make this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace. And the second would be for 30 million dollars a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account.

 

You know, if I had three wishes I could make this holiday season, the first, of course, would be for all the children of the world to get together and sing, the second would be for the 30 million dollars every month to me, and the third would be for encompassing power over every living being in the entire universe.

 

And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, the first would be the crap about the kids definitely, the second would be for the 30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year to have an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought out slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina-somebody, I can't think of her name. Of course my lovely wife can come too and she's behind me one hundred percent here, I guarantee it.

 

Wait a minute, maybe the sex thing should be the first wish, so if I made that the first wish, because it could all go boom tomorrow, then what do you got, y'know? No, no, the kids, the kids singing would be great, that would be nice. But wait a minute, who am I kidding? They're not going to be able to get all those kids together. I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible, more trouble than it's worth! So -- we reorganize!

 

Here we go. First, the sex thing. We go with that. Second, the money. No, we go with the power second, then the money. And then the kids. Oh wait, oh jeez, I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay, I need revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in hell! That would be my fourth wish. And, of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace. Thank you everybody and Merry Christmas.

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Guest imported_Tesseract
Originally posted by symbols@Dec 5 2005, 03:15 PM

holla

in a thread like this, it pays to keep the IQ level as low as possible.

 

 

yknow what i also want?

 

i read once about a small village in southeast asia

people there apparently believed that the U.S. is so rich

we have ATMs here that just dispense money.

as in, no PIN, no account, just go get money

 

i want one of those too.

 

 

You know what i REALLY want? i've been dreaming about that since i was kid. I want a pillow made out of living/warm tits with full neural response and natural woman smell. That shit would make my century. I live for the day DNA technitians will be able to hook me up..

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