cloner Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 this is probably one of the funniest threads ive read on here. more sex fart stores please. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balki Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 Originally posted by InDY_500@Jul 19 2005, 09:04 PM I say spew, if you blow chunks and she bails it was never meant to be.... ohh wait wrong scenario.... It happens to the best of us sir.. Good shit though... Quoted post wayne's world wayne's world party time excellent Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
[Flowling.] Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 L. O. L. The look on her face when you bolted was something for the ages, I'm sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vanity Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 jebus.. i seriously need some help... ya'll kids are cracking up and i didn't even crack a smile :o i'm going to bed.. hopefully it's cause im tired Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Balki Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 Originally posted by ElectricitySucks@Jul 19 2005, 01:37 AM then a few minutes later, i REALLY had to pee. that shit sucks even more, but at that time i just stopped, waitied a few mintues, pissed, then got back to business Quoted post you should of pissed inside her Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ODS-1 Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 If I ever get queefed on I'm just going to bust out lauging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
vptonbing Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 let it out, fuck that Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smart Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 Originally posted by rental@Jul 19 2005, 02:24 AM have any of yall tried beano? or is that for sissies? i never have...does it work? Quoted post Hahaha, My x-girl's dad got Beano for Xmas from his sister one year... I never heard/smelled the joker fart but DAMN! When the family drops that in your stocking then they're sending a message I guess... I farted while getting head once... I could feel it at the back door and I didn't know how to handle it so I just said "Know what I think?" and let it rip... It stank so bad I got her up off the living room floor and took her to the bedroom... And on the spew tip... Man, damn... one time... I picked up this girl at a show, an outdoor concert, and I wanted to get at that but, I had been drinking ALOT (suprise!) so, anyway, I got her to dip out to the truck w/ me... got her out there and started mackin' got her pants to her ankles and went to lick on the Y but after I took 2 that beer ALL came back and I had to jump out and throw up for like 5 minutes, all coughing and watery eyes and shit... Man, f'real, I think I freaked that girl out... I was telling her it wasn't her fault and I swished w/ some listerene and hit it from the back for a sec but she just didn't seem to be into it any more so I got outta her and we got outta there... Seriously though, I think I broke her ego... Good times... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wAndEreR Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 Originally posted by Balki+Jul 19 2005, 11:07 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Balki - Jul 19 2005, 11:07 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-ElectricitySucks@Jul 19 2005, 01:37 AM then a few minutes later, i REALLY had to pee. that shit sucks even more, but at that time i just stopped, waitied a few mintues, pissed, then got back to business Quoted post you should of pissed inside her Quoted post [/b] haha u shoulda pissed in her trash can..thaz wut i did ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thought Wrong Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 Ive had to pee while on the recieving end of a lil suki suki. I told her, got up pissed and when I cam back she wasnt into the head anymore so we fucked. There was this other time, same girl as from above, we were both laying down and I put my chest against hers. Well she like pulled me in, anyway, our chests made that farting sound that you do with your hand and your armpit. We both started laughing but we kept fucking. Ive never been queefed on though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ElectricitySucks Posted July 20, 2005 Author Share Posted July 20, 2005 Originally posted by nomadawhat+Jul 19 2005, 09:23 PM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (nomadawhat - Jul 19 2005, 09:23 PM)</div><div class='quotemain'><!--QuoteBegin-ElectricitySucks@Jul 18 2005, 10:37 PM so finally, im just like FUCK THIS. i bolt outside, almost falling, and knocking over various assortments and BAMMM!!! out comes this 5 second long fart. i will never be able to tell anyone how revelied i felt. then i think i casually walked back into the room and got back to business. Quoted post did you even say anything? or was the girl like, what the fuck are you doing, or she just thought nothing of this. funny shit. Quoted post [/b] im pretty sure i just ran away without explanation. she was weirded out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coco chanel Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 chest to chest farting noises are comedy... has anyone got there girl in a queef groove... like you find that angle that just gets them cranking out and then hold them so they cant move while you laugh. completely off topic who has been squirted on.. and why is it so disgusting Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aids is a myth Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 fupa sex is where the money is Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hopeizm Posted July 20, 2005 Share Posted July 20, 2005 pipippipipipipipipip BANNNNNNGGGGGG! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RideTheFire Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 Originally posted by coco chanel@Jul 20 2005, 12:17 AM completely off topic who has been squirted on Quoted post not squirted on but her juice like dripped out onto my thigh area. she had the nerve to say if it was me. "what the fuck kind of a question is that. im wearin a rubber" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oneeightyone Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 funny story sunday i wake up and there's woman juices on my upper arm. i remember banging said girl out in the backyard, how i got it on upper arm...not sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
synaps Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 puuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuush Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nutonce Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 yeah so. i bag this oldhead while shes with her daughter, i know she'll fuck. easy. thing is my wiz comes home tomorrow and i cant have my dick smelling like pussy. but this bitch is thick and she knows what i want. im either going to smash today and induldge in showers or hold off. because her face is a throwaway. if her face wasnt bad i would smash with no second thought. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nutonce Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 im fucking. whatever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BurgerKing Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 Originally posted by Nutonce@Jul 21 2005, 02:35 PM im fucking. whatever. Quoted post Ive had to hold farts in so much its like im dieing. One time i was taking a pee and let one go forgetting that the walls echo in the bathroom and where I was at the time (my gfs house while she was waiting in the hallway outside) - I shouldnt have felt that comfertable. Shit was loud. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClueTwo Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 I fart while getting blow jobs..no thing man..Everyone does it..Soem people are just pussies about it.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndexFingerS Posted July 21, 2005 Share Posted July 21, 2005 haha my hand is raised. I think I'm going to actually try and make a girl queef. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PINK DOT Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 ahh great thread.. but yea some noises you run up on during sex are hella funny.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thedrifter Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 My girlfriend shit about 5 pounds of crap on my stomach when she was lifting herself off after anal once, but she was a good girl and licked it all off as i had run out of charmin in my bathroom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lameassnigga Posted July 22, 2005 Share Posted July 22, 2005 Hold the fart in while having sex, then when you finish and are laying in bed act like you are going to spit up in the air. If she pulls the covers over her head let that stinky fucker out.! Best shit ever!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RideTheFire Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 Originally posted by lameassnigga@Jul 22 2005, 08:43 AM Hold the fart in while having sex, then when you finish and are laying in bed act like you are going to spit up in the air. If she pulls the covers over her head let that stinky fucker out.! Best shit ever!!! Quoted post haha aww shit thats just classic. haha :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunk Sober Posted July 23, 2005 Share Posted July 23, 2005 I banged my 40 something year old neighbor again tonight. I was sweating all over the slut. I put an icecube in her pussy and turned her out. She was talking dirty and had her ankles next to her ears, so I pulled out and made her gulp down my white snot. Then I told her I had to go and she sent me off with a cold beer. No farting, but it sure was a fucking blast!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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