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seeking

all that you cant leave behind...

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what have you lost that you cant get back? not a can of black while running from the cops, not your car keys.

 

after your mom stopped dressing you and you began making your own decisions, which ones do you now realize were bad ones? what have you done that you cant undue, but haunts you still?

 

 

 

seeking/skeletol closet keeper

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Hmmmm, bad decisions....not running from the police, when I should have....I lost my time, my patience, my money, my goodwill. Now I'm overwhelmed with legal problems...I wish I could have my life back.

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I decided to start college at the tender age of 16. I got in over my head and had to grow up fast. I lost two years of goofing around.

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Guest Dusty Lipschitz

what have i lost that i can't get back?

2 things

my dad

my childhood

no doubt

 

my dad

died when i was 10

an anniversary just passed and i miss him

deeply

 

my childhood

i would give up my left nut to be 5 again, and be able to grow up again...

i dont know if i would do anything different other then enjoy the growing up experience. i wish i never went through life wishing i was older. everytime i got older, there were more responsibilities, and i lost innocense. thats one thing i wish i had back. my youthful innocence and ignorance. no cares on the world. no bills. no bosses. no girls stressin me out. just hanging around the neighborhood being a kid...

 

what would i do different?

nada

nothing

i have come to the conclusion that i needed to go through and experience everything i have in my life to reach this point. and i love this point. i like the person i am and have become. and i beleive i have only gotten here because of the trials and tribulations i have survived. sometimes i think its a really selfish thought, because i have put alot of loved ones thru so much shit. but i have talked to them about it and they agree with me.

not a bad deal.

 

my .02

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Guest imported_Tesseract

to many...

 

I've done a lot of stupid things concerning girls,but somehow that seems to amuse me (victim or victimizer) rather than hunt me.

The most terrible things i've done took place when i was a kid.Those hunt me in a way.They remind me that when out of focus,i am capable of really odd things and desicions.

From my adult life the thing that hunts me the most is something that happenned 3 years ago.I was in a very rough situation and the fact that i couldnt say "fuck y'all" and face despair while figuring out the next move made me stick to that situation and suffer for a long time in the "hands" of people that had power on me and abused it all the way.

I dont know,sometimes i cant really make a difference between being good and being a victim.

By the way...i broke my nose an hour ago...stuck my head on a glass door,shit was weird i didnt knew what hit me.The way you react in situations like that is very important.Your reflex could be the only guide you can have sometimes.

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Damn, I thought this was about the new Starting Line EP..oh well.

 

Anyways, I don't think I would have changed anything. ALl the stuff that I did and that happened to me happend for a reason. No point in dwelling in the past. Live for the moment, don't ever regret.

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im not asking what you would change, im asking what things have deeply effected you in perhaps a negative sort of way. what have you done that has made your life harder. and im not talking about getting busted once for bombing a stop sign. im talking serious shit here. shit that has made you who you are. we all have fucking defects otherwise we wouldnt be on this board talking about the stuff we do. come on... open up a little bit.

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Several rash decisions have left me to contemplate if I have been making wrong choices all my life. I remember growing up and always having to stand up for what I believed in. Being stubborn I have lost close friends that I should have treated with more care and respect. I think about those friends who passed away and that they could be watching me"depending on religious values" All in all I wish I had been able to treat everyone who deserved it with more respect. Now I have to think of the what could have beens. Like in a Bronx Tale, Every guy get three really special women in his life. I too think I had all of mine already. :(

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exactly i was going to list something but thinking back on it i learned a few valuable lessons and regardless of being momentarly robbed of my integrity i emerged a better person for it, from that point on it was the begining of my life....i still hope that person is face down in a creek right now but thats besides the point:D

 

i would have to agree somewhat with dusty....i started working as soon as i was fourteen thanks to a company that was violating certain labor laws....while all my friends were off fucking around playing pee pee touch with the little girls i was on the job, working away the last 4 years of my youth....then again looking at all those people im kind of glad i did that too....oh well, such is life

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Guest Remy Martin

as gay as this sounds.

i lost my innocence way young.

i regret dropping out of ninth grade and being a jr thugscout.

i regret dissing my fams.

i regret becoming a alcholic.

so now ima part vampire ink paint pain user as stated previous.

and im crazy to.

sanity was nice.

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nice post seeking, the title sounds so familiar..... whats it from? a title of a cd i think?

 

theres alot i thought i would have changed. but now looking back at it, it actually changed my life in a way that would not have been possible the way i was living. being in trouble with the law, things that have happened within my family, things with friends, and things with my girlfriend. i miss my freedom, but isolation has given me a chance to find myself and change my life, and its all been for the better. and im happy with it. i just miss the friends whove passed on at such a young age, and all the people ive know whove passed. i wish they were back, but that wont happen. i just miss people that have left me living and dead. but if i could do it all again i wouldnt change a thing.

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well since i cant edit my post cause im not a registered user, ill make a new one. things that have affected me in a bad way......

 

 

i regret becoming an alcoholic. drinking away everything i have. ending up broke almost the same night i got paid. i regret getting drunk so much that my family didnt know who i was anymore. i regret ignoring and turning away from the peopl who love me.... losing them was the hardest part. i regret thinking i was some sort of bad ass when i was drunk and hurting people for no reason. i regret stabbing that kid in the face while drinking. ive lost everything because of that shit. alcoholism is such a hard thing to deal with. and its brought me so much hardship. but im proud to say ive mended things with my family and those around me, and am slowly talking to people who i was mean to again. im also proud that ive cleaned up my act and am clean again, and gotten rid of that addiction. these things still haunt me......

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I think, also, I may not have taken so much LSD....I can only realize the effects now, if I could have only seen them then...I am permenately changed.

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bad decisions bad decisions...christ, there are so many to choose from...lets start out with the most recent. Not running from the fat fucking cops who in no way wouldve ever been able to catch me...now i got a court date on halloween...you know i'm fucked. then moving in with my girlfriend....totally ruined our relationship....so...think long and hard or think fast when it counts...

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Originally posted by Dirty_habiT

I think, also, I may not have taken so much LSD....I can only realize the effects now, if I could have only seen them then...I am permenately changed.

 

YOURE? permanently changed?!?

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Yea, I used to be a little more down to earth and sane...but now, my thoughts seem to be inter-planetary most of the time...I think it was the acid.:eek:

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i regret not learning social skills. i played by myself too much maybe but now i have to force myself to be social. i wish i didnt have to be drunk to approach a girl. also i have chosen to be too emotional about everything. this is a bad decision for a cold ass world. i want not to care when people are assholes to me.

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I've never felt young and carefree the way all my friends have. I've worked since I was 14, moved out at 18, and started college. I never felt like a kid, because I never had anything in common with the children my age. I don't miss my childhood. I never wanted to socialize with kids my age, so working didn't bother me. At least I was with older kids. That may have affected certain events in my life. I started smoking and drinking at a very young age, and drugs followed closely. I always used in moderation though, so I was never an addict, and didn't become a vegetable like all the others.

 

I have always been headstrong, and rarely back down, which caused some family troubles. They were all smoothed over and buried through the miracle of therapy.

 

I do miss my father rubbing/scratching my back as I would go to sleep as a child. It seems as kids, mainly in North America, get older the intimacy we have with our parents dissipates. It becomes gross, and we look at people who do keep that bond as perverts. I rarely even hug my father now. We still love each other, but we've lost something I don't thinkw ill ever come back.

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Guest platapie

i dont regret to much i have lived my life pretty good so far. but i do wish i finished school andtryed harder there. oh and as gay as this sounds and i no alot fo you feel the same way about someone but i think i played my cards all wrong with one girl in my llife who i still am very much in love with. at least were freinds i guess. whoa like sad now.

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my mommy

 

and if i could go back i would have treated her better.and understood what she went through.

 

dayne b.

 

i wouldve been on better terms with him at the time.

 

i definetly would have paid attention in school when i was younger,if i knew how rough shit would get later.

 

that flat black i lost cause of the stupid cops,and my car keys.

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Originally posted by platapie

whoa like sad now.

 

hah...........damn. well, ............my major ex girl, I'm kinda glad that i've gotten over any positive or negative feelings towards her. Its more like neutral, and..........eh i've been having alot of dreams of her, so i don't know what that means.

 

 

eh, oh well.

 

Happyness is solitude is something hard to grasp. hold on while you can.

as for changing anything, i wouldn't.

All the events in your life make who you are no? and i am happy with that as well.........hah:dazed:

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I miss the days i could play inside a cardboard box....dont quite fit anymore.

 

I miss my dad.

 

I regret not fully apreciating people till they move away, or leave my life by other means. not practicing guitar hours on hours every day, mixing up my prioritys.....

:::sigh:::

damn...its bittersweet.

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