T=E=A=S=E Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 ok, so im hurting here. dont know where this latest depression feeling came from, but it hit, and it hit me hard. to start things off, my best friend, mainly my only friend, hasn't came by or called me up for like a week in a half or more, and we used to chill daily. what happened to him? he got a girlfriend. now, im not really mad at him, cuz i know if i had a dope chick that i loved and wanted to be with all the time, id probally do it to, but it just sucks because now i dont got any friend to kick it with, or shoot the shit with, and i dont got a girl either to occupy my time. and unlike you guys, im not cool enough to go out on my own to a bar or club or whatever other social gatherings you guys go to to meet people. i dont even like people 99% of the time. i have a dying urge to meet people, i know i dont want to be alone cooped up in my room all the time, but i dont know whats wrong with me, i just dont like being around people much. most people anyways. sometimes you'll run into nice, ginuwine people who are caring and friendly and all that other shit, and i love meeting them because i can look to them and gain wisdom, adivce, etc from them. which is always good i think. then im dealing with the facts that im not as smart as i wish i was, i mean street wise or common sense wise, im good to go, but as far as being well educated in book material, and history, and just interesting facts, im not as informed as id like to be. and i know you guys are thinking, "so do something about it, start reading..." which is true, but let me vent. plus not only that, i have a horrible memory for some reason, maybe because i havent pushed my brain in quite sometime. i dont know. but it bothers me that im not as smart as id like to portray. and ive come to realise, that im scared of fine girls. its pathetic. ive been trying to build up the balls to talk to them, and try to behave myself without thinking sexually, because after all, any girl who does put out or give me head in only a few days of knowing them, isnt the type of girl i want truely anyways. sigh. then, i feel like my life is the same shit every single day. all week long i wake up at 5:30 am, think to myself how much i hate my life when i really dont, but i hate waking up that early for work, then i go to work, come home around 4pm.ish, turn on the computer, jack off about 5 times to internet porn, then do something else of little importance. its like a never ending cycle. im working, not having much fun, aquiring a lot of shit i probally dont need but enjoy for the meantime, trying to pay of my car and credit card bill, which seems like they'll never be paid off, and so on. i guess the main thing im looking for in life right now is either a job i love going to and doing the work when im there, or something or someone to love. (either a girlfriend or a pet) im so tired of not having a girlfriend to do things with, or someone to care about, and getting that love in return. it sucks being single. another thing that bothers me is how expensive things in life are. shit seems like its impossible to get where i want to go. (nice cars, nice house, all that shit ya know?) i guess i need to get into some more involved hobbies that are crazy time consuming. (i just watched like 45 episodes of some hotrod car building show) and man was that cool how they got to work on things they love, see it come together, and have everything work out in the end. (they built a hot rod from scratch, and it was really cool). im tired of graffiti because i suck at it. :mad: people i know online (aim list) havent been on... i swear they musta all died or some shit. tired of always feeling like a fucking outcast, or that i dont belong somewhere, or that everyone hates me or dislikes me, and all that bullshit. its probally not ALWAYS the case but then again who knows. if i dont like myself most of the time im sure others wont either, isnt that how the saying goes? some shit like that... hmmmm, what else what else. im tired of complaining to. i keep thinking about "just do it" ... "dont put it off til tomorrow when you could do it today" and all kindsa bullshit sayings like that... i hate those. but they are so on point to. fuck. anyways, tired of typing, so ill stop here. thanks for not caring. thanks for not reading. bring on the bullshit replies. hahahaha. fuckers. :crazy: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crookedline Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 BOO-HOO-OLA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Telo Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Oh jesus... You just got 400 thousand extra pansy points for this one tease.. Suicide would solve all this crap.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 You just gotta get out there and do what you want to do, you can't really jsut look around at other people and want what they have, becuase you could never live up to what other people .are, or at least in your mind. I'm the same way when it comes to meeting people, I really hate people, but how do I really know I'm gonna hate a person if I never meet them. It's hard to get over pre conceived images of people, jsut by how they look, or act, you know? I should reap what i sow, but it's a hard thing to get past Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Poop Man Bob Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E ok, so im hurting here. dont know where this latest depression feeling came from, but it hit, and it hit me hard. to start things off, my best friend, mainly my only friend, hasn't came by or called me up for like a week in a half or more, and we used to chill daily. what happened to him? he got a girlfriend. now, im not really mad at him, cuz i know if i had a dope chick that i loved and wanted to be with all the time, id probally do it to, but it just sucks because now i dont got any friend to kick it with, or shoot the shit with, and i dont got a girl either to occupy my time. and unlike you guys, im not cool enough to go out on my own to a bar or club or whatever other social gatherings you guys go to to meet people. i dont even like people 99% of the time. i have a dying urge to meet people, i know i dont want to be alone cooped up in my room all the time, but i dont know whats wrong with me, i just dont like being around people much. most people anyways. sometimes you'll run into nice, ginuwine people who are caring and friendly and all that other shit, and i love meeting them because i can look to them and gain wisdom, adivce, etc from them. which is always good i think. then im dealing with the facts that im not as smart as i wish i was, i mean street wise or common sense wise, im good to go, but as far as being well educated in book material, and history, and just interesting facts, im not as informed as id like to be. and i know you guys are thinking, "so do something about it, start reading..." which is true, but let me vent. plus not only that, i have a horrible memory for some reason, maybe because i havent pushed my brain in quite sometime. i dont know. but it bothers me that im not as smart as id like to portray. and ive come to realise, that im scared of fine girls. its pathetic. ive been trying to build up the balls to talk to them, and try to behave myself without thinking sexually, because after all, any girl who does put out or give me head in only a few days of knowing them, isnt the type of girl i want truely anyways. sigh. then, i feel like my life is the same shit every single day. all week long i wake up at 5:30 am, think to myself how much i hate my life when i really dont, but i hate waking up that early for work, then i go to work, come home around 4pm.ish, turn on the computer, jack off about 5 times to internet porn, then do something else of little importance. its like a never ending cycle. im working, not having much fun, aquiring a lot of shit i probally dont need but enjoy for the meantime, trying to pay of my car and credit card bill, which seems like they'll never be paid off, and so on. i guess the main thing im looking for in life right now is either a job i love going to and doing the work when im there, or something or someone to love. (either a girlfriend or a pet) im so tired of not having a girlfriend to do things with, or someone to care about, and getting that love in return. it sucks being single. another thing that bothers me is how expensive things in life are. shit seems like its impossible to get where i want to go. (nice cars, nice house, all that shit ya know?) i guess i need to get into some more involved hobbies that are crazy time consuming. (i just watched like 45 episodes of some hotrod car building show) and man was that cool how they got to work on things they love, see it come together, and have everything work out in the end. (they built a hot rod from scratch, and it was really cool). im tired of graffiti because i suck at it. :mad: people i know online (aim list) havent been on... i swear they musta all died or some shit. tired of always feeling like a fucking outcast, or that i dont belong somewhere, or that everyone hates me or dislikes me, and all that bullshit. its probally not ALWAYS the case but then again who knows. if i dont like myself most of the time im sure others wont either, isnt that how the saying goes? some shit like that... hmmmm, what else what else. im tired of complaining to. i keep thinking about "just do it" ... "dont put it off til tomorrow when you could do it today" and all kindsa bullshit sayings like that... i hate those. but they are so on point to. fuck. anyways, tired of typing, so ill stop here. thanks for not caring. thanks for not reading. bring on the bullshit replies. hahahaha. fuckers. :crazy: That's quite a load. Why don't you just concentrate on solving one of those problems, give yourself a month, and see where you are? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AREANKAY Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 listen to iron maiden and do hard drugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 to tag along with what PMB said, sit down and make a list of thing you want to accomplish and just set out and do one thing at a time. you are still young and have tons of time to accomplish tons of things. Stick with your job, pay off your car and credit card bills, and save enough money, maybe take a night class, you seem to know and like cars, do some night course of mechanics or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
THEWORD Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by AREANKAY listen to iron maiden and do hard drugs no...someone who sucks at life as much as this fella obviously does has no business listening to Maiden. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 1, 2004 Author Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by Telo Oh jesus... You just got 400 thousand extra pansy points for this one tease.. Suicide would solve all this crap.. pansy points eh? i guess... im not scared to say how i feel, its like telling a friend except most of you guys dont like me. haha. i could care less. and yea PMB, i guess i could do that, try to solve one thing at a time an shit in said amount of time. but ever time i solve one thing, it seems like 10 more add to the list, ya know? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crave Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 my pops has always been real big on the whole, "Do it now" type of attitude. i was the fuck it, it can wait, tomorrow, next week. . . you get the idea. but my point is, do it now. like pmb said, pick something out about yourself, your life, situation, whatever and work on making it better. it's important to have small goals. imagine your life is an arrow headed for a target. if the arrow is slightly off when it was first shot then by the time it gets to the target then it'll be way off. but if slight adjustments are made along the way then you're that much closer to ending up on that bulls eye. perhaps that made sense, maybe not. . . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TPSR? Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Ever think about going back to school? You can gain whatever knowledge you desire, and meet new interesting people aswell. I'm the same way with people for the most part, 85% of people don't stack up to what i'd call a friend.. About the female thing.. What are you going to lose by just saying ''hi''? EyeforanEye has it right.. How can you dislike people without knowing them? Trust me, I ask myself the same question.. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, until i'm proven otherwise. Sometimes I just feel like, what's the fucking point? Point is, find out what you like doing, and do it.. Ever think to ask you friend if his girl has any hot friends? I've had plenty of flings start that way... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 1, 2004 Author Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by TPSR? Ever think about going back to school? You can gain whatever knowledge you desire, and meet new interesting people aswell. I'm the same way with people for the most part, 85% of people don't stack up to what i'd call a friend.. yes, i need to go back to college. i have about 2 - 2 1/2 years left depending on what i try to get a degree in. but, as ive mentioned before, i dont know what exactly i want to major in, and im to the point where all my basics are taken care of, and i need to get into my "major" required classes. so once i know more of what i want to get into, and i get some money for college saved up, and i decide im responsible enough to go back and not blow my shot, ill return to college. and i had the same trouble meeting people at school as i do everywhere else. half the time i dont feel like putting up the effort, or i judge them based on shit i see them do and disreguard them, or im not comfortable or confident or whatever else to go up to them and strike up a conversation. i couldnt get girls in college really either, because i didnt have any friends to go out with, or goto parties with, and im honestly not confident enough i guess to go to such things by myself and feel comfortable. i also probally have severe anxiety problems. Originally posted by TPSR? About the female thing.. What are you going to lose by just saying ''hi''? sounds easy enough i know, but like i mentioned above, i dont feel like trying half the time, or im not confident, or im just wanting to have sex with them, not really make friends or date them, so that fucks it up as well. i havent gotten any action in a couple of months, so its like im fiening for crack i want some pussy so bad, so that also clouds my thoughts when i see a girl im interested in. Originally posted by TPSR? EyeforanEye has it right.. How can you dislike people without knowing them? Trust me, I ask myself the same question.. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, until i'm proven otherwise. Sometimes I just feel like, what's the fucking point? i try to give people benefit of the doubt SOMETIMES, but im also very observant. ill sit back and observe them with their friends, or what theyre doing period, and see how they act and talk and so on, and base my decision on whether or not id care to kick it with them on that. and most the time, they arent the type of people im interested in hanging out with. honestly, id like to hang out with an older crowd, that likes to maybe drink, no drugs (or atleast not base their whole evening around doing lines, or smoking pot, or popping pills to be cool) , some people about making money, responsible, and going somewhere with their life. someone i can learn from and look up to types... Originally posted by TPSR? Ever think to ask you friend if his girl has any hot friends? I've had plenty of flings start that way... my best friends black, and his chick is black, and all her friends are black for the most part, somewhat ghetto, and have kids... aka no thanks. but come to think of it, none of my friends really hooked me up with a girl before... (i got shitty friends in some reguards i guess). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 1, 2004 Author Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by AREANKAY listen to iron maiden and do hard drugs ive downloaded some of their songs, pretty kickass stuff. what are some of your favorite songs of theirs? i like these so far: -running free -wasted years -be quick or be dead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 tease, get two minutes to midnight. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T=E=A=S=E Posted June 1, 2004 Author Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by EyeforAnEYE tease, get two minutes to midnight. downloading now... what are some more bands/groups like these guys? this some good stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abracadabra Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 EMO Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fannypack2 Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by AREANKAY listen to iron maiden and do hard drugs this guy has obviously been in the same position tease is in, or worse. loser:tongue: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Try getting some old Anthrax albums, like Among The Living, maybe some Megadeth stuff. Try that for starters. * Also check out Bruce Dickinson's solo prject called Bruce Dickinson, he was the original singer of Iron maiden, and is now back with them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DETO Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by AREANKAY do hard drugs seriously.</span> Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nekro Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 First up, you sound like you're depressed. You might want to get some real therapy. Maybe you should check that out. Second, figure out what you want to do with your life instead of looking at internet porn so you'll have no excuse for not going back to college ASAP. Do you want to keep installing a/c for the rest of your life? I thought not. Go take a career test or something. I think you should get a pet. Maybe a cat, something that will return your affection. From what i've heard, cats will love you unconditionally, which is probably something you could use right now. As cheesy as it sounds, it sounds like you need to do something where you can get a sense of accomplishment. Check out some hobbies, see what you're interested in. Find something you like and that you're good at. Chances are you'll also meet some people while you're at it, and you might figure out what you want to do with your life to boot. As for being "smart," just read a lot. It doesn't even have to be books, if you read fark.com and the NY times front page you'll be in good shape to converse with most "smart" people. Take everything one day at a time, just focus on achieving one thing. Think of it as steps up a mountain, just focus on making it up the next step instead of making it up the whole mountain. Do first things first, save up your money and go back to school. Then worry about the house, job, wife, etc. And fuck the haters on here, living well is the best revenge[ola]. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
metallix Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 WELL FOR ONCE ILL TAKE YOUR POST SERIOUSLY!! A) You need to set yourself some goals. Take yourself seriously. B) Figure out what the Proletariat is. You are the Proletariat. C) Go See a Psychologist to Help You. D) Stop Buying BUllshit and concentrate on saving money for college. E) Window tints may be nice but an education is better. F) There's nothing wrong with having a shit job as long as u have a job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnnyLode Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E ive downloaded some of their songs, pretty kickass stuff. what are some of your favorite songs of theirs? i like these so far: -running free -wasted years -be quick or be dead get these songs... all hits and all goodies... -the trooper -alexander the great -hallowed be thy name -anything off of "piece of mind" and maybe some europe and stryper to go with it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
casekonly Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 the things that give us comfort are our cages. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by JohnnyLode get these songs... all hits and all goodies... -the trooper -alexander the great -hallowed be thy name -anything off of "piece of mind" and maybe some europe and stryper to go with it. also grab the whole Powerslave album. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mr.yuck Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Paxil. They made this for you. Check into it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest diggity Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E to start things off, my best friend, mainly my only friend, hasn't came by or called me up for like a week in a half or more, and we used to chill daily. what happened to him? he got a girlfriend. This could be worse, he could be out doing all those things with your girl, which happens alot more to people than you would think. Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E i have a dying urge to meet people, i know i dont want to be alone cooped up in my room all the time, but i dont know whats wrong with me, i just dont like being around people much. most people anyways. sometimes you'll run into nice, ginuwine people who are caring and friendly and all that other shit, and i love meeting them because i can look to them and gain wisdom, adivce, etc from them. which is always good i think. then im dealing with the facts that im not as smart as i wish i was, i mean street wise or common sense wise, im good to go, but as far as being well educated in book material, and history, and just interesting facts, im not as informed as id like to be. and i know you guys are thinking, "so do something about it, start reading..." which is true, but let me vent. plus not only that, i have a horrible memory for some reason, maybe because i havent pushed my brain in quite sometime. i dont know. but it bothers me that im not as smart as id like to portray. and ive come to realise, that im scared of fine girls. its pathetic. ive been trying to build up the balls to talk to them, and try to behave myself without thinking sexually, because after all, any girl who does put out or give me head in only a few days of knowing them, isnt the type of girl i want truely anyways. sigh. go to college this will solve the above problems. Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E then, i feel like my life is the same shit every single day. all week long i wake up at 5:30 am, think to myself how much i hate my life when i really dont, but i hate waking up that early for work, then i go to work, come home around 4pm.ish, turn on the computer, jack off about 5 times to internet porn, then do something else of little importance. its like a never ending cycle. im working, not having much fun, aquiring a lot of shit i probally dont need but enjoy for the meantime, trying to pay of my car and credit card bill, which seems like they'll never be paid off, and so on. cant really help you with this one, i got the job i thought was my dream job and its good, but it too is a cycle. Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E another thing that bothers me is how expensive things in life are. shit seems like its impossible to get where i want to go. (nice cars, nice house, all that shit ya know?) i guess i need to get into some more involved hobbies that are crazy time consuming. (i just watched like 45 episodes of some hotrod car building show) and man was that cool how they got to work on things they love, see it come together, and have everything work out in the end. (they built a hot rod from scratch, and it was really cool). Thank MTV for that. Extravagant lifestyles that kids wont ever be able to reach, to help out with that, watch fight club, maybe that will solve your hobby problem too. other wise, hobbies are real expensive. Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E im tired of graffiti because i suck at it. :mad: cant help you with the graffiti part other than tell you no one said it would be easy, and for what its worth your way better than i ever thought you would be. Originally posted by T=E=A=S=E people i know online (aim list) havent been on... i swear they musta all died or some shit. tired of always feeling like a fucking outcast, or that i dont belong somewhere, or that everyone hates me or dislikes me, and all that bullshit. its probally not ALWAYS the case but then again who knows. if i dont like myself most of the time im sure others wont either, isnt that how the saying goes? some shit like that... try developing real life friends, people that you can really go to when you have a problem. cant really tell you what to do about the outcast problem, i got the same problem, i usually go through a different cycle of friends every 4-5 years, and theres not really many of them i feel that comfortable around. Metallix hit it on the head. Goals do wonders for yourself, try writing them down and giving yourself a date to complete them by. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaCosaNostra Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 I'm really depressed, but do I do shit about it? NO! But by the time I'm your age I'll probably be pretty fed up with it... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ODS-1 Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 Stop bringing your emo problems to the internet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EyeforAnEYE Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 how the hell are they "emo" problems, every single person goes through shit like this. If he chooses to vent shit this way, whatever, maybe he'll get some good advice from people who have been through the same shit on here, and it seems like people have been putting in good input. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adderall Posted June 1, 2004 Share Posted June 1, 2004 :cry2: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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