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confessions.


dELiSs

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I stumbled on this site where people annomously confess thoughts, things they've done etc. I just thought some were interesting..I dont know if something like this has been posted .

 

I am currently flunking my Cinema class, and my teacher keeps throwing it in my face. I feel like killing him, but instead of doing that, I write scripts about doing it. It's a good stress reliever.

 

I am working in Korea. I pretend that I am Jewish so I don't have to do stupid things at Christmas and Easter, or say prayers with the kids I teach

 

although i am not gay, i let guys watch my masterbate on webcam.. frequently. i am also one of belgium's premier collectors of african shrunken heads.

 

i have a poop fetish. i asked my (ex) girlfriend to poop on my face and she broke up with me. i fantasize about pooping on girls and having them poop on me. i get turned on when i poop my pants. i usually do it before i have to take a shower, then throw my boxer shorts away. i've gone through literally dozens of boxer shorts because of this, but i can't stop

 

I fucked my uncles wife!

 

i once forced feline feces into a girlfriends mouth after she told me she had cleaned and emptied the litterbox. i went in the closet picked some up that missed on the way in, and fed it to her stating; "if i'm only going to get s#it from your mouth , it's time we put some back in"

 

I walked into an old woman today.

She glared at me and told me, "If you stayed to your right, you wouldn't have that problem."

So I glared back and said,"I'm not the one with the problem lady. You are old and you are going to die soon."

I think she was crying when i walked away

 

 

It's nice to know other people can be infinitely more fucked up than you ever thought you were. Then again, it's all relative to the individual.

I get off on the failure of others

 

I hate this girl at work because she is tall skinny and has long blonde hair and she is loud and has like a cup boobs but always has a push up on she think she looks like every gorgouse actress alive or dead and guys love her i want to piush her off a cliff i cant stand her

herre.

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Originally posted by dELiSs

i have a poop fetish. i asked my (ex) girlfriend to poop on my face and she broke up with me. i fantasize about pooping on girls and having them poop on me. i get turned on when i poop my pants. i usually do it before i have to take a shower, then throw my boxer shorts away. i've gone through literally dozens of boxer shorts because of this, but i can't stop

 

please keep my personal thoughts off 12oz on subjects as such.. its ok though, i forgive you, anyways.. excuse me, i need to go shower

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Originally posted by dELiSs

I walked into an old woman today.

She glared at me and told me, "If you stayed to your right, you wouldn't have that problem."

So I glared back and said,"I'm not the one with the problem lady. You are old and you are going to die soon."

I think she was crying when i walked away

 

 

that's fucking great.

 

 

 

 

so are we doing our own confessions here? gimme a while to think of one....cos i'm an angel ya know [/bullshit]. ask me on tuesday

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- I frequently j walk.

 

-One time i took a book from the fiction section in the library and put it in the non section (i also did this with action/comedy videos at blackbuster)

 

-i patted my friend on the right side of his shoulder and stood to the left of his shoulder...you can only imagine the madness it caused when he turned around to see i wasnt where he thought i would be.....

 

I was quite the hoodlum in my younger days.

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Someone showed me this a while back.

Its pretty funny.

 

 

"Yesterday I farted while just hanging out in my apartment by myself. I then felt a wet spot in my underwear and proceeded to check it out. Yup, there was definitely a dirty spot from some shit that had shot out. Even though I knew what it was, I still stuck my nose up to it and took a good inhale before putting it in the washer.

"

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Originally posted by CLAYTONCROWN

Someone showed me this a while back.

Its pretty funny.

 

 

"Yesterday I farted while just hanging out in my apartment by myself. I then felt a wet spot in my underwear and proceeded to check it out. Yup, there was definitely a dirty spot from some shit that had shot out. Even though I knew what it was, I still stuck my nose up to it and took a good inhale before putting it in the washer.

"

haha dood you sharted

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Originally posted by GucciCondom

168160424 I fingered my girlfriend after I took a dump, and I didnt wash my hands before I fingered her.

 

She got sick later. She got better though.

 

We broke up and now it makes me laugh to think that I made that bitch sick with my shit hands.

 

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

 

:lol: :bawling: :yuck: :bawling: :lol:

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another one i found..

 

One time I was at this party, and was having sex with a drunk girl in the host's little brother's room. She passed out, and i was "done", so i got the idea to stick the kid's pet gerbil in her butt. To this day, i both laugh, and feel ashamed, whenever i see this girl again. (she has no idea i did it).

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"I often fantasize about having sex with my mom, my sister, and my brother. Sometimes one at a time, but other times a threesome or a nice big incest orgy. I'm fucked up in the head."

 

"Sometimes when it's just me and my sister alone in the house, I watch porn with the volume full high, in the hope that she will be turned on by it, and we could have sex"

 

:lol:

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i'm confessing bad things...things i'm making up like"

 

i have had sex wiht my neighbor and her dog three times, the first time, she just watched, the second time she wanted to join in, and the third time i pulled out some rusto and we huffed it and i accidentally killed the dog ..

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"Over the summer I began doing stencil graffiti (art!) all around Boston. Its a real blast and i got pretty creative with it too. In the beginning i was doing it to promote creative ideas as well as anti-war slogans and anti-corporate messages. Now its more about getting a street reputation and recognition.

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Guest mikro137
Originally posted by dELiSs

I play Quake 3 Online under a number of aliases. They are often offesive words or phrases. I even use the 'tag' of a local graff legend. I love you tox

 

this gets an A+

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at a party last summer i found a pack of ciggs, so i took a few out and rubbed the part you suck on all over my asshole, then left them laying around the party for joe cool to smoke.

 

i dumped a roomates cat in a neighborhood far far away because he didnt clean the litter box frequent enough. i told him i would help him post lost kitty signs and daily assured him the cat would come home.

 

ive bought paint recently.

 

edited to add that these are my own confessions, not someone elses.

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oh fuck this is a hilarious thread..

 

i have a poop fetish. i asked my (ex) girlfriend to poop on my face and she broke up with me. i fantasize about pooping on girls and having them poop on me. i get turned on when i poop my pants. i usually do it before i have to take a shower, then throw my boxer shorts away. i've gone through literally dozens of boxer shorts because of this, but i can't stop

 

this one really made me crack the fuck up, but the shit about making a bitch eat cat shit, and dumping some dudes cat far off then helping him try to find it.. priceless lolol

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Originally posted by KRONOLOGIK

Random confession 734347377: o.k. I have a wierd fetish. Well, it's not a sexual one, so it's more of an obsession. I piss in sinks in public places and I can't stop laughing while I'm doing it. Mainly at my school too.

 

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

Holy shit, i do the same thing but the song "Prepare for total domination!" plays in my head at the same time too. I piss all over walls too.
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Originally posted by dowmagik

i dumped a roomates cat in a neighborhood far far away because he didnt clean the litter box frequent enough. i told him i would help him post lost kitty signs and daily assured him the cat would come home.

 

 

 

please believe i would beat your ass if this were my cat. i would

kick you in the stomach while you were lying on the ground and

make you scream "im getting my ass kicked by a girl!!!!!" and/or

"cats have feelings, too!!!" each time. this would go on until 1) you

started crying in earnest (ie like a little girl) or 2) you were

bleeding out of any orifice. following this, you would get kicked out,

and find me my cat. afterwards, my cat and i would feed you some

shit. then, you'd get beat down to the ground again just so i could

kick you in your jaw and id send you on your merry little way.

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