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The day my life took a turn for the worst..


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guys,

i just want you to know that i honestly feel really bad for you both, whether it be a friend or a soulmate that moves away, it is the worst feeling that you could ever have.

ive had both those situations happen to me before. two of my girlfriends moved away from me, both that i thought were my soulmate. it sucks when the person that you think that you could be with 24 hours a day for the rest of your life just straight up move away and you cant even see them, well..that just sucks some straight ass.

that is why at this point in my life (im bout to be 21) im just searching for the things that make me happy by myself. which is so fucking hard. i dont wanna go out and fuck bitches that i met at a club like my friends do. i want someone that will be there for me and i can be there for them. someone that i can share everything with. but i know that im gonna have to wait. so right now im just doing my own shit. like graff, music, school and whatever else i feel like doin. but anyways, i feel for you both and if you ever are lonely you can IM me on aim, my screenname is bigbrunojones.

peace out, and i hope that you all will be ok.

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i am not going to say anything that anyone else hasn't said but this is from a chick's perspective. so she says she's leaving in a few months... have you two ever talked about marriage? it sounds to me like she's giving you a "subtle" ultimatum. i.e. "ask me to marry you or i will leave you and go to europe and live with my ex's". staying with the ex's is a jealousy tactic. no matter how honest you think your girl is... she is female. she is manipulative. any guy will back you up on this and any girl will admit it if she is honest ( kinda like masterbation). if it isn't about that get off your dumb ass and go to europe with her. keep her exboyfriend's damn hands off her.

 

and if she really wants to break up in six months so she can "find herself" (broke and hungry) in europe, break up with her. don't torture yourself with a girl who doesn't like you enough to continue to be your girlfriend.

 

i hope she at least read what you posted here. it was really sweet.

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hmmm...... im kind of in the same boat as you. but my girl is going away to well everywhere soon enough, shes a model and its always been her dream to model all arouund the world as far back as her childhood. this is something that i found out after we got together, so i cant interfere (its just not right). in my heart ill miss her dearly but i know were meant to be together so i wont stop her dreams. she asked me to come, id love too, but i dont want to be either a pain in the ass to her or in some strang eplace alone hile shes working, so ive decided i wont go. i know its right, shell come back. if its not right, and she doesent come back to me, it was never meant to be, as me going over ther would only prolong the situation. in my opinion, dont go, if its right shell know it too and come back to you. if its not right, well, itll be hard but its the way its meant to be. maybe you should go find your self while she is doing the same.

 

 

its the old saying. if you love something, let it go, if it comes back, its yours forever, if not, it was never meant to be.

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I think that's what falling in love is all about. A guy at work put it really well the other day, he said "when you fall in love it's like closing your eyes and falling backwards. you expect/hope that the one you love will be there to catch your fall." It's true that you take a blind leap, not knowing where you're falling. Then this person is there behind you, catching you, guiding you, giving you a reason to keep falling back into this vulnerable state. When that person decides to leave, you still feel like you are falling... except this time, you're falling without direction, without support, without comfort, and to top it all off, you're falling alone. It's completely natural that now you feel confused, scared, directionless, all that.. If you didn't, that would mean you never really let yourself fall in love with her.

 

Anyway, my whole point of this is, you take a risk when falling in love. You constantly have to take that risk over and over if you want a relationship to prosper. You could break up with this girl, who you feel like is your soulmate and be angry and sad and pissed and all of that.. and that would be fine. Or you could try and see where she's coming from, understand that her leaving is her own quest that she has to take (she's smart for living out her own dreams) and it has nothing to do with you personally. You wouldn't want her to resent you for the rest of her life. Let her know how much you love her, how much you will miss her, but no matter what how much you support her. You could agree to be friends while she was gone, stay up dated, and then that would give you time to get your own life back.. so when she came back, if it didn't work out, it wouldn't be such a shock to your system. I'm not saying let her drag you through the mud and just smile and pretend like it's okay. But if you really love her as much as you say you do, then you should want what's best for her, and be there for support, and don't just give up when it gets hard. She will respect and love you even more for that.

 

 

 

 

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PRUDE - If I had nuts, you'd be on 'em.

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Originally posted by Iris:

i am not going to say anything that anyone else hasn't said but this is from a chick's perspective. so she says she's leaving in a few months... have you two ever talked about marriage? it sounds to me like she's giving you a "subtle" ultimatum. i.e. "ask me to marry you or i will leave you and go to europe and live with my ex's". staying with the ex's is a jealousy tactic. no matter how honest you think your girl is... she is female. she is manipulative. any guy will back you up on this and any girl will admit it if she is honest ( kinda like masterbation). if it isn't about that get off your dumb ass and go to europe with her. keep her exboyfriend's damn hands off her.

 

and if she really wants to break up in six months so she can "find herself" (broke and hungry) in europe, break up with her. don't torture yourself with a girl who doesn't like you enough to continue to be your girlfriend.

 

probably the worst advice I've ever read in my life. And no, not all girls are manipulative. and yes, I masturbate.

 

number one, if this girls traveling around the world "searching to find herself" she probably isn't one of those girls that just wants a ring on her finger and a white fence in her front yard to feel secure.

 

number two, don't EVER compromise yourself for someone else. Especially when it involvs flying half way accross the globe when you don't want to.

 

number three, it is very possible to have ex's who are just friends. i have two who i would concider really good friends and i would never even DREAM about hooking up with them again.

 

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PRUDE - If I had nuts, you'd be on 'em.

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i wish i had a girl that i could fall in love with. the only girl close to that is my one friend that i hold hands and talk about getting married and having kids with. now that i havent seen her over the summer or really talked to her, it gave me enough time to figure out theres things about her i dont like and not little things that i could work with like her insecurity and need to party and get drunk all the fucking time. i know for a fact i kind about her and love her but, i dont know. im only 19.

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.......go with her......travel the world.....and if you still dont wanna go....enjoy the next six months and go visit her for a couple of weeks when she goes....dont overact and dont be passive agressive against her....love is more about letting go then holding on....enjoy her now and wait till tomorrow....i dunno realtionships are a phenomenon(sp?) just enjoy the time....r

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Guest wakassOATH

id say go with her or atleast meet up with he for a few weeks

traviling is wicked man and its not that often you get to go to europe or whatever

but its pretty fucked up that "if you dont come i will hate you forever"

thats a bunch of shit im no love expert but if shes trying to pull that shit then its probably not real

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From experience..when they go to a far away place, they fall in "love" with someone else.

They will not remain faithful.I wouldn't either.I also know that when they come back, they want what they had before.People want to feel somewhat free in a relationship.And if it is meant to work, and if soulmate is what they are, it will make it through that.

I have learned that if one is a "soulmate" many people will pass in between you and them, and that they need freedom from a relationship to grow and expand in life.

If you love someone set them free.

 

..only my opinion..

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Guest MR BOJANGLES

you could always do a homicide/suicide the day shes supposed to leave...

(MR BOJANGLES INC. 2001 does not endorse nor approve of people dying. all similarities and likenesses to that statement are becuase of beer consumption and are to be taken lightly.)

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Originally posted by HESHIANDET:

get her pregnant!!HAHAHAHAHA! thats ruggid as shit.

why wouldn't YOU want to go to europe for a bit? paint trains and shit. duh....

 

nice hesh. man after my own heart.. heh..

 

 

this sounds pretty damned serious to me. i don't know how old you are but this sounds like you're going on 18/38 and you're looking to settle down allready. to me that's not the wisest of moves. hasbeen had some really good points. i'd listen to what he's said and just let this shit hash out.

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Originally posted by fr8oholic:

 

this sounds pretty damned serious to me. i don't know how old you are but this sounds like you're going on 18/38 and you're looking to settle down allready. to me that's not the wisest of moves. .

 

I kind of agree with you fr8o. I'm only 24 and I've only known this chick for about 2 years but you know that feeling you get when you've found "the one".. hasbeen is right, love means to set someone free I guess.. no matter how much it hurts.

 

Yo CMEUP - that pregnant shit could have happened last night.. girl forgot to take her pill til I woke up in the middle of the night and remembered... http://www.12ozprophet.com/ubb//eek.gif'> ..the sex was good tho.

 

Oh, and Bojangles - the suicide of her ex is pretty much what triggered this whole mess..

 

keep em comin. thanks all.

 

peace

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this may sound dumb but have you told her all the things you put in that post?

she may feel very strongly about you too, its just she dosent think you do or something.

anyhow, you need to tell her either way if shes that important in your life.

peace and good luck.

 

------------------

"PFGK"

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Guest MR BOJANGLES

id have to say that if she wants to go be with her ex's in europe over you...let her, that just means that her love isnt true enough to stay there with you bro. ive sacrificed a lot for girls in the past and been hurt bad, real bad...dont do it man. give HER the ultimatum...SHE CAN "FIND HERSELF" IN AMERICA. i did.

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