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alfred

oyster card: how it can help u!!!

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For all you non londoners the oyster card is a new card for travel in london.you simply charge it up with money at many convenient places and you can travel 'hassle' free on buses and the underground.

 

The advantages are that you dont even have to take it out of your bag you just put it near the ticket barrier and it should open....WOW!!!!

 

Also you dont have to spend a few minutes waiting in ques so that your not a second late to your precious fuking job

 

However, when you buy it you have to give your name and address....

for all of you mugs thinking 'so what?' well I tell you what...

 

This now means that you can be traced anytime you enter or leave the underground and they can find you on camera when they need to have visual evidence of putting you in the place at a certain time.

 

If your still thinking so what then I'll tell you what...What if the police suspect you of doing something and they just need to prove that you were in the area at the time the crime happened? Now they can.And the oyster card will be taken as hard evidence cause computers dont make mistakes do they? But what if..........

 

I steal your card and leave it at the scene of a crime?? You may say well the'll look at the cameras and see that it's not me...yeah?

 

if you've ever seen the quality of most camera footage, half the time people all look alike......So there...all you tiket buyers beware cause in 10,20,30 years this scheme will probably apply to shopping, clothing, children and any other controlling aspect of our lives.

 

Oh yeah and for anyone that thinks im talking shit there already exists software for cctv that is being tested NOW on the underground which picks up on suspicious body language....This means that looking at too many trains as they go by, looking around you too much, nervousness in general are all things that the system highlights and brings you to the attention of the operator.

 

Rinse the system while you can cause soon the octopus will tighten it's grip still tighter...London=Mordor

:evil:

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Oh yeah and for anyone that thinks im talking shit there already exists software for cctv that is being tested NOW on the underground which picks up on suspicious body language....This means that looking at too many trains as they go by, looking around you too much, nervousness in general are all things that the system highlights and brings you to the attention of the operator.

 

 

yikes

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Guest de la cruz

OYSTERMAN

 

i was filming some post xmas damage and some old cunt flashed one of them at me saying i werent alowed to be filming on the underground. i believed him at first thinkin he was LU, then dissed that fool coz i realised he werent even.

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AT FIRST I WAS TURNED OFF BY THE OUTSTANDING LACK OF PHOTOGRAPHS. IMMEDIATLEY AFTER THIS, I WAS DISCUSTED TO READ YOUR A EUROPEAN. (KIDDING) NAH BUT HONESTLY, YOU SUCK

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I think maybe you Americans that dont understand what this technology will mean for the human race and it's freedom should suck a shotgun.

 

why dont you just fuk off bak to fantasy world america where europe is one country and george bush tells the truth and is not a murderer.... FUK YOU :lol: :lol: :lol:

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Originally posted by alfred

I think maybe you Americans that dont understand what this technology will mean for the human race and it's freedom should suck a shotgun.

 

why dont you just fuk off bak to fantasy world america where europe is one country and george bush tells the truth and is not a murderer.... FUK YOU :lol: :lol: :lol:

 

my god...that is so poignant....

 

believe me guys....the british arent as retarded as they seem on this message board....

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Just tell me where I can get a bootleg card.

 

Anyone know if the 'two year old travel card' scam still works? I had one weekly travel card from March 2000 that worked from March 2002 all the way to 31st December 2002, but then suddenly stopped working. And now none of my old 2001 cards I collected do anything.

 

:confused:

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ok. heres one for yers.... go to one of them shitty newsagents which doesnt have a machine for printing travelcards.... they stamp the date on instead..so... rob a pack of blank cards... and stamp the dates on yourself...

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naa I dont think you can get a bootleg card but I know old school writers did the travel card thing by robbing a station one night.

 

I used to get travel cards (printed on machines) and scratch the numbers off with a pin and pencil it in, then you crease the card up a bit and LT's usually let me through thinking it was a creased magnetic strip.I had to run a few times once I had to duss from lancaster gate all the way up the stair case an over the barriers with TI's behind me.

 

Now i can do it on photoshop, print it out myself and stick it to the front of an old card but just be careful cause you can get done for fraud for this.

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Originally posted by alfred

naa I dont think you can get a bootleg card but I know old school writers did the travel card thing by robbing a station one night.

 

I used to get travel cards (printed on machines) and scratch the numbers off with a pin and pencil it in, then you crease the card up a bit and LT's usually let me through thinking it was a creased magnetic strip.I had to run a few times once I had to duss from lancaster gate all the way up the stair case an over the barriers with TI's behind me.

 

Now i can do it on photoshop, print it out myself and stick it to the front of an old card but just be careful cause you can get done for fraud for this.

 

Did you know that whenever you get a "Seek Assistance", a number flashes up somewhere on the side of the ticket barrier, so that the LU staff can tell why your ticket isn't working?

 

I can't remember where I saw it, but there is a list of all the numbers and what they signify.

 

So, if you are going to blag a "damaged magnetic strip", make sure that it really IS damaged, otherwise you might get a "travel card out of date" error displayed!

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Originally posted by freeque

Did you know that whenever you get a "Seek Assistance", a number flashes up somewhere on the side of the ticket barrier, so that the LU staff can tell why your ticket isn't working?

 

I can't remember where I saw it, but there is a list of all the numbers and what they signify.

 

So, if you are going to blag a "damaged magnetic strip", make sure that it really IS damaged, otherwise you might get a "travel card out of date" error displayed!

 

Here's something I found on a website....

 

"Clive D.W. Feather" <clive@demon.net>

Thu, 27 Jul 2000 10:27:24 +0100

Actually, the risk here is in misunderstanding the system. The system as

a whole (not just the automated gate) worked exactly as designed.

 

The ticketing gates have 40 or 50 heuristics for detecting problems and

fraud. If the gate is unhappy with the ticket presented, it displays the

message "Seek Assistance" and a code number that the staff can use to

determine what the problem is.

 

The staff member at the barrier line can apply much more intelligence to the

situation than a machine can. In particular, if you talk to railway staff

you'll discover that they soon acquire a "sixth sense" of when people are

trying to fiddle and when they are being honest. There are also various

"trick" questions they can ask.

 

Mr Roberts was caught by the "in-out-in" detector. This applies *at a

station*. It is quite possible to exit at a *different* station before

the timer (15 minutes, I think) expires, because this detector will not

then apply.

 

>It could be even worse; say there's a fire and you need to get out and the

>station is not staffed.

 

The barrier line *MUST* be staffed at all times. If the member of staff

has to leave for some reason, he or she *MUST* deactivate the system,

which opens all the gates. This is a Health and Safety issue, and LU

would be fined heavily if caught breaking it.

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A fucking hilarious "unofficial" guide to the tube:

 

Tube Guide

 

Here's some extracts...

 

Penalty Fines

 

If you don't have the exact ticket for your journey you will be fined £10 on the spot. It doesn't matter if all the machines at the unmanned station you started out from are broken, it doesn't matter that you didn't realise that Tooting Bec is in Zone Two and not Zone One, you either have to travel back to where your ticket is valid, go to the surface, buy another ticket and return or pay £10, even if the difference in fare is actually about 50p.

 

Do not imagine that if you point out you have the wrong ticket and go to the excess fare box at your destination station that they will let you pay the difference. They won't.

 

Avoiding Nutters on the Tube

 

The tube network is full of nutters. They climb on and rant at the top of their voice about religion or beer or about women that they hate. They always shout. They often smell. And they always sit next to you. Here's a foolproof method of avoiding them:

 

Wear your sunglasses on the underground. This means you can look at everyone else without them seeing you and you can see nutters coming.

Listen to a Walkman, but not too loud in case they come at you from behind.

Every now and again, sing along very quietly to the music or mouth the words to the song.

The result is that you will never have to put up with nutters, or anyone else. I guess the moral of the story is that if you can't beat them, join them, especially as it has been pointed out that a sunglass-wearing, Walkman-dirging person is most people's generic description of "the Underground nutter".

 

Ye Olde Tube Gayme: Ye Undergrounde Tyckett Scamme

 

This is now an unworkable scam because of the £10 Penalty Fare but what the hell.......

 

Say you wanted to travel into London on a Friday and back on a Saturday. You couldn't buy a travelcard and had to buy 2 expensive single tickets. Unless... you didn't buy a ticket, got to your destination, told the inspector in the little box that you needed to get a travelcard but couldn't buy one because ~insert favorite excuse here~. Now, the man in the box couldn't issue returns or travelcards but was reasonable so would charge you the difference in price between a single and a travelcard. This was sometimes as little as 40p. You would be told to buy another single when you needed to get back. Of course you wern't going back until the next day and would repeat the same scam.

 

However, as well as the £10 fine, the Weekend Travelcard has also helped with this.

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