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weed story


El Jefe'

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Ummm... i couldent really figure out what was goin on when it happened. it was my first time. I started ssayin shit and my friend corded it.had to post it. is this normal cause i was way wacked out. any advice for next time?

 

these feild full of doorbells that were fucking ringing all this wind was flying around and this man he was like, he didnt know what was going on, he said the sun was very large, he walked into a roof and there was a lot of metal and stuff and there were piels of stick or stones, but they left him alone cause they ddint know if he was alive or in. The man, he knew what was going on. this was the smartest man tha ever lived, he could run faster then a cheata. He could jump into trees. but then he was running and he went into the tree again. Something wrong with the pool it may not be true but,i dont know what to think is was out of control, some man told me about womens rights then

 

Like to eatt between midnight aand 1 pm so they can regenerate.

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i remember we all met up at my boys house..he was moving out and so the house was empty...we just got there and started to burn this fatter than the norm blunts...we heard knocking from the bedroom door..he opened the door and all the smoke rushed out the room into this persons face..All you could hear was"Oh my God..what are you doing?GET OUT!ALL OF YOU!oH MY GOODNESS.."IT WAS HIS MOM..the whole time there was this cloud over her face so she couldnt see..it was pretty funny...you really couldnt see her face..and smoke kept rushin her direction..everybody skipped out the window...what a strange night..

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...did you smoke weed laced with lsd? jesus jefe!...i remember my first tyme...smokin in central park, then gettin on the subway sayin' 'dam! i dint feel a thing!'...next thing i know, the floor is moving, voices get blurred, and everyone was lookin at me(ofcourse they really werent)! my friend askes if im feelin it...i look up from the floor of the subway...and he says jesus! put your fuckin head down dood, ya look fukced!...then we proceeded to just bounce around the city, laughin' and smokin all nite...HEART PALPATATIONS! (wait till those kick in jefe! just remember YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DIE!....ah first tymes...rOe

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hmm... i can remember the SECOND i got high for my first time... Me and 2 other kids were up in this kid's attic... and We'd been smoking the whole nigh... we had about 1/4 of an ounce of this shit that was fucking purple... good stuff. But i wasn't feeling anything... we were using a bowl for awhile and then i was just kinda buzzed and said "FUCKIT!" and started rolling a half assed joint... I take one hit... my eyes are flooded with tears... i thought it was from the smoke so i throw the joint down take a few steps back and WHAM! i feel something hit me in the back of the leg... apparently it was a beach ball that was on the floor but i just screamed out "Wholy shit i just walked into a pile of frying pans backwards!"... ah good times, too bad i've been sober since january.

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"...You can't trip out by smoking LSD, you gotta take it orally..."

 

 

...OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHH...now i see why it didnt work! who are you timothy leary? no shit einstein, i was being facetious...i was droping acid when you squirtin' capri suns in the air and gigling on elmers school glue...tuff to decipher sarcasm i suppose...r

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oh shit man first time i actually got high i thought i could fly i was running and jumping and shit it was crazy one time i smoked a bowl with my friend and the shit made it so none of us could walk we stole it from my friends dad it was like our second time and it was still the best looking bud ive seen to this day

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  • 1 month later...

I'm starting to get into gonzo journalism and all that good stuff, so recently whenever I get hi I try and write down whatever wacked out shit i'm thinknig or try and record our conversations on tape. This is the funniest stuff to read the next day, its like "damn, I was fucking out of it! Listen to this shit!"

 

I was thinking of starting a website and putting up all of this crap on it so other stoners can laugh at us.

 

anyone think this is a good idea?

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nigga put together that website. that shit would be huge. the only problem is you might get people trying to act extra outrageous for comedic value..keep it real if you do it.

 

my first time..

I was with some of my boys at a parking lot where they go to smoke sometimes. They were rolling krypto blunts which they told me 'was like desert'. So I start smokin and shit not feeling anything. Then we see a car creepin..we can barely see it through the bushes but we think its a cop so my friend tosses the blunt and we all hop in the car and jet. after we realize it wasnt a cop we go back to get the blunt, I get out the car to help look. For some reason the walking around is what really kicked it in for me. so we get back to the car and shit is feeling different. i feel like Im not really a part of my surroundings. so I say calmly 'I feel like Im watching a movie!' of course they all bust out laughing. when we stopped we were at some dead end and got out and chilled. I had that rapid heart shit, I thought to myself 'oh damn I just did drugs' and started thinking how I had just entered the world of drug addicts and shit. then I worried about my heart and shit,m it was beating fast and I thought Id fuckin die. I didnt though. then we went to the golf course and smoked there for awhile. good times.

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Originally posted by AlphaMega:

Originally posted by mapo wc:

so I say calmly 'I feel like Im watching a movie!'

Ever feel like your in a movie that shit used to happen to me when i first started smoking

 

 

 

me and about 5 other weed smoking friends were about halfway thru an Oz of kronic and we were sitting on my porch all talking and my porch is connected off of my kitchen with a screen door.. and the door is framed - my friend and his girlfriend were argueing in there and it felt like we were watching them on TV ... best ever

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did anyone actually read the jefe's post? that is some of the most off-the-wall shit I've read in a good while. maybe 5% of it makes any real sense. I'm interested in the story you were trying to tell about the man that walked into a roof with lots of metal and stuff, and piles of sticks OR stones. I mean honestly this is some quality story telling, write a sober version so I can understand, PLEASE.

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When I was in elementary school me and these guys would always make eachother pass out (hyperventalation), which would you give you about a 3 minute high. But I didn't know that I was high, I just felt like it was a dream state, half awake, half asleep.

 

The first time I got high, me and my friend were smoking out of a bowl that she made in art class and I got REALLY stoned all at once. But since I had never been high before, I thought I was passing out, and waking up, and passing out, and waking up, and passing out, and waking up. I flipped the fuck out, thinking I was dying or some bullshit. She was flicking me with water out of a cup, I guess because I was flipping out. I just remember looking up at her with this little yellow cup, she was stoned out of her mind too, flicking water in my face, trying to look all concerned but only managing to look like she was on the verge of hysteria. I couldn't figure out why this was the funniest picture I've ever seen in my life. We must've cracked up for an hour straight, somewhere in the midst of which I realized I was really fucking high. Then we watched Natural Born Killers.

 

------------------

PRUDE - If I had nuts, you'd be on 'em.

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This just happened last night:

 

Me and one of my friends were with this guy we know, a real nerdo-pussy type kid who we only hang out with him coz he has his own car and it's funny to see him totally wasted (you all know the type). Anywayz, we were already pretty drunk and stoned, and it took us like half an hour to convince him to let us hotbox his car. This kid is like deathly afraid of his parents, and it's his first time ever smoking weed. Anyhow, we pull into this alley, it's like 2 in the morning, nice and quiet, and get this really nice hotbox going on, the windows are all fogged up, and this guy starts like panicking. Then, completely out of the blue, we hear this banging on the window. He screams in terror, rolls down his window, lets all this smoke blow into some old bitches face, guns the car straight onto the road, oblivious to the yield sign, misses a speeding car literally by inches, zooms down this street refusing to slow down, blows past this cop car, but there was no one in it. He stops, we all compose ourselves, and he starts saying shit like "guys, I don't feel like myself at all", and "I'm really scared something's gonna happen". I'm still in shock from almost getting killed, and then we drive around like for an hour in this neighbourhood we don't know, putting up with his bulshit, just wanting to get home before he kills us.

 

If it's your first time, don't drive, at least not with me in the car.

 

Just one in an endless list of great stoner stories

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i got a story. me and my friend went to our local headshop yesterday cause he wanted to pick up a cheap bong to carry us over until i get the 18" ice-notch roor. so anyways, we go up there and the lazy bastards have a sign on the door "store closed due to illness" which i read as "store closed cause i'm fucking stoner pothead whose job at the headshop is even too much work for me." so we walk off all pissed that we couldn't get a bong there cause there was a nice acrylic one he was gonna get. then from the clouds above we hear "hey, you guys looking for a smoke shop?" we're like what the fuck and look up and the phone company dude is sitting way up there on the telephone pole fixing the lines or whatever they do up there. i says "yeah." then he says "go to..." and gives us directions to another one. we say "yeah, we know about that one. on our way there now." he says "cool man." i says "take it easy man." and then me and my friend laughed about it for a few minutes, got the new bong, then took some bingers.

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First time I smoked was with my way way back, like pre-school back-in-the-day-homey Oscar. He came around while I was doing some nerdy little shit and said- "Hey buddy- lets go for a ride." We met up with another guy I didn't know and biked it to Oscar's. We got there and he puts the fatty on display- (even to this day I would say it was a fatty) and without questioning my homey I got lit up. His aunt busts in the room while Im taking a toke and acts all fucking nuts looking at me. I freak out for a second until Oscar explains that she is deaf and is asking me for a hit. I specifically remember the smell of the gang bringing me back to camping trips with my pops and his peeps out by the lake. We spent the rest of the day riding around town on our bikes. I even saw a girl I liked from school and she commented on my smile. I'm gonna go smoke now.

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When we got to 'the rocks,' we were in absolute awe of nature. We could see the sheer beauty in everything... we stopped talking and began to 'stare' out into the trees... at one point in the staring, I began to feel as if all my senses were in fact, one sense. I could see EVERYTHING at once.... and then... IT happened.

 

I'm not sure what IT was. Time disappeared. It felt like eons had passed, and my two friends had switched positions (which originally blew my mind -- I thought something VERY divine had taken place, but they had in fact, moved by their own control). However... very strange things began to happen. Telepathy. We were completing one anothers sentences.... I had an odd feeling that the first substance was more powerful than the second... but nonetheless... it was as if I had shut off that one sense...

 

There were moments when I was taking everything in... becoming totally still... then -zap- time would seem to disappear. It felt like I had been sitting there for days... yet only 3 minutes had passed. I asked my friend for the time everytime this happened... and it happened a fair number of times. Yet, only a few minutes would have passed.

 

My friend would have gotten sick of me asking, had not the same thing been happening to him... and what seemed to be in unison. There was an odd connection, which we seem only able to explain as 'telepathy.' Yet not telepathy in the mind-reading mind-controlling state... only becoming one with everyone.. yet it doesn't really seem like that either. It's hard to understand, and harder to put into text.

 

I still think I shut off the one sense... and experienced 'something else'... yet, I have a very hard time remembering. The substances seemed to be hard on the short term memory... while the experience was valuable... I was overwhelmed with a fear of self-destruction on the come-down... that this continual slipping of time would in fact continue on,... that it was in fact simply my short-term memory completely malfunctioning... Sleep did not come easily...

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For some reason the walking

around is what really kicked it in for me. so we get back to the car and shit is feeling different. i

feel like Im not really a part of my surroundings. so I say calmly 'I feel like Im watching a

movie!'

 

I had almost the exact same experience. we were smokin on this porch swing in the front of my friends house, and when we stopped i thought nothin was gonna happen. so i got up and went inside. within maybe 30 seconds at the most i felt really disconnected, like watchin a movie. weird shit.

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Originally posted by i love phat rabbit:

i hate people that make tokin a bigger deal than it is. get high. dont make up stories or talk about how high u are.

 

word. its just smoking weed, dont try to be a pot head and always talk about it and have all your humor come from "half baked". ive got alot of high stories, but ill just tell a few. first there was the one where i almost threw up on my girl freind after we smoked at her house. that ones not funny ata all. and then the last time i smoked i ened up with a cheer detergent box on my head while trying to explain "the matrix" to my best freind, who was sober. weird shit

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i usually sit around and take everything in and i get all philisophical.. the first time i smoked i was with my friend eric in the 6th grade and we were smoking out of a pipe but i wasnt inhaling i didnt know you had to right so he told me and i started inhaling anyways i smoked about 5 bowls and we walked to the store on the way to the store i started realizing how beautiful things are and how lucky i am to be alive.. i got this warm feeling of total happiness... then i almost died the whole time i was drifting into the street and i was almost hit by a car it was great fun

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