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loopsnew

dear abbey...

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define foreplay... on the basis that's it an early start to a relationship. a little naive, but bare with me... so say you start dating someone. but your not ready to have sex... but your def all about having a little fun, right? well, how far is too far without teasing the fuck out of the other person? meaning, i guess, is there such a thing as teasing to the point they get mad?

 

scenario: date 6. everything above the belt so far has been explored. how can i explore further without having to actually have intercourse? i haven't even tried touching past the belt, cause to me it just seems... i dunno, unfair to him. an unbearable tease. i don't want to be a tease. but i do want to... explore. the thing is, that's all i want to do. i dunno if i even like him enough to progress further, you know? honestly, i just want to enjoy myself, but NOT at the expense of others. that's my dilemma, i guess.

 

so if intercourse isn't a given outcome, then its not really foreplay, huh? hmm. i guess i just want to know exactly what you deem... appropriate (?). oh. and for those that will undoubtedly post useless shit, allow me to say upfront, fuck off.

 

thanks

:n

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If he doesn't get off, then he's been teased. A big boy can handle this. Just like if he gets you all worked up then you have to go home and play with your dildo. Are you pissed at him for not finishing you off?

 

On the other hand if you don't like this guy enough that you think you'll never have sex with him, why are you wasting your time in a relationship you know is going to end. Wasting his time is much worse than leaving him feeling like he's been teased.

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that's just it, i don't know. sometimes i'm really giddy to see him. sometimes its more like .. blah. <-- my discovering my likes and dislikes of him. noone's pissed. i just don't know my ...boundaries, if there are any...? i don't want to piss him off, is what i'm getting at.

 

i mean, that's what getting to know someone is all about, i guess. i'm just a bit clueless :lol: i know. sad. just don't really know what to do. eh. thanks anyways :)

:n

 

p.s.

option a

option b

 

^^^ how long can that go on before he expects intercourse? i know everyone is diff. just. haah. nevermind. i'll figure it out. one way or another. thank you.

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Originally posted by !@#$%

option a. jerk

option b. suck

 

whoa.

 

 

let me regain what's left of my composure....

 

 

 

ok then. It's been a while since I've been in that situation but trust me...

every guy has been there before. Usually in the teenage years before

they even really knew what do do anyways. I think that the key is to

make a distinction between 'foreplay' and just 'making out'. I read an

article that claimed 'Making out is the new sex'. It was more so about

women in their prime who were tired of not getting the attention they

wanted because men were only about that single act. So they had to

find a way to get a bit of the intimacy back.... I'm off topic.

 

I guess you just need to make it clear how far things will go before

you both get all heated up. It's like driving a fast car. If you're expecting

to hit top speeds over a quatermile, you'll work the engine in a different

way than if you had a 50 mile race ahead of you. If he guns the engine

to hit the quatermile and you're pacing for the 50 there will be trouble.

 

did you like my racing cars metaphore?

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Originally posted by Kilo7-

I guess you just need to make it clear how far things will go before

you both get all heated up. It's like driving a fast car. If you're expecting

to hit top speeds over a quatermile, you'll work the engine in a different

way than if you had a 50 mile race ahead of you. If he guns the engine

to hit the quatermile and you're pacing for the 50 there will be trouble.

 

 

hahaha are you intentionally trying to confuse our young whore

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^ not really.

 

I just know she's into cars so I'd try to create a good comparison.

 

I could have just said blue balls are bad.

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lol @ kilo. thank you. i knew i could count on you :lol: now go beat up arcel and his assumptive heavy-handed fingers and i'll buy you another 'beer' ;)

:n

 

p.s.

freightlover. you are correct. but like is said, i don't want to ... use. straight up, i just gotta talk to him. see what 'race' he plans on winning. i see that now. thanks everyone.

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Guest WebsterUno
Originally posted by loopsnew

p.s.

option a

option b

 

^^^ how long can that go on before he expects intercourse?

 

as long as you can make him bust one off..

I dont think he mind not getting any play.

For some, thats plenty.

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date #6?

Christ....what happened to the 3 date rule? Don't tell me its gone the way of the dodo!

options a & b could probably get you another month, before the frustration gets to be too much.

I gotta ask...what's homeboy doing? Is he puttin around like he's driving his momma's automatic or is he driving it like a stolen 6 speed 911? If he's letting you do the initiation then you can probably get more time out of it. if you're constantly having to relocate his hands...time is running out...quickly.

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  •  
    Nice with the continued car comparisons.
    I'd be willing to be that these two are both
    still on their 'learners permit' if you get what I'm saying.
    The 3 date rules only applies to licensed drivers.
     

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Originally posted by Kilo7-

  • The 3 date rules only applies to licensed drivers.
     

 

whew....thank god...I was afraid that your making out is the new sex statement...was actually true.

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Guest WebsterUno

*believe*

 

I knew a girl that only gave head, but was

still a virgin. shes not a virgin anymore!

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so did I...only she had been with 1 guy before me. looks like I got your sloppy seconds webster. did she think she gave really good head....when in fact...she didn't?

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Huh.... yeah this is a good question actually. One that I think has no definite answer but really depends on alot of factors... Like Kilo sez it's about where you're at.

I my balls twisted and tightened up just rapping with this one girl. Though that was a very unique situation. They are screwed so tight everything I've tried so far to get rid of it has failed! I guess I was on one of those really high physical/mental/emotional/spiritual plateaus and when I fell from grace before my moment of truth I guess I got stuck in a world of hurt.

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if you are very (and i stress VERY) good at your selected option, and the guy is into you, i bet you can make him wait a long time.

 

but, it won't last forver

and it may help to give him a 'heads up' no pun intended

 

..so at least he knows maybe why you arent into the checkered flag, but that you are down to explore other regions in a well equipped luxury vehicle at a safe speed..

who knows..maybe he'll give you excellent full coverage insurance and you'll feel safer

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hahha. he actually drives an imprezza (really!) but he's been acting like he just got his head rebuilt from being too aggressive :crazy: i think its more a cautious gesture to not offend me...? and i know i must be giving weird signals with wanting but not wanting it all...? its like if he rolls into his staging lane just right, he can go, but i tend to mess up the signal, making him have to reverse... which inadverteably makes me a tease, huh? not good. i'll have to talk to him. i do want him to be more aggressive, but i don't know if i'm ready for the consequences. why i hesitate, i guess. do i really want the responsibilty of such a communion?

 

am i over thinking this? yeah. when i'm with him, i just go with the flow and have fun. but as we see each other more, i can't be so blasé with my actions, you know? i really don't want either of us to...blow our engines ;)

 

haha. so this car metaphor thing is too funny. "excellent full coverage insurance and you'll feel safer" hahah. but in truth, that's it. i'm a bit...apprehensive about letting go. last time (and only time) i did, i got hurt pretty badly. and i can't believe i've gotten this old and am so fucking clueless. heh. well, i def appreciate the feedback.

:n

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well, you gotta put your shit on the line if you want a relationship, bottom line

 

i know all too well about been there, been hurt, fuck that.

 

but i have kept on keepin on, and right now, i'm really fucking happy.

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