rip Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Originally posted by mr_president please believe if a chick tries to have my baby and she a skeezer, i'd laci peterson her ass... :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol: ahahahahaha thats fuckin funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bathoræ Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 bickering aside... Originally posted by !@#$% women have so many different responses to everything..this is no different i've known a few girls who were emotionally devastated for quite some time after the procedure..there is NOTHING anyone can say to make a woman feel better about herself in that situation.. she must learn that the decision was for the best for everyone involved, that there was no other solution, and that she is not a bad person how long those lessons take really depend on the woman somettimes, the woman doesn't realize what she's lost until it's been suctioned out of her sometimes, 9 months later, the reality hits and it's horrible.. if i were you, i would just be supportive. that means listening.. not always talking back, or suggesting, or advising, but listening.. i would compliment her, in many ways..don't be afraid to say you're happy she was strong enough to make that decision also, if i were you i would acknowledge that she did something, for the benefit of both of you, that was really really fucking hard hopefully, she can see the big picture, that it's better off this way, that she is not a bad person, that she will be able to have kids one day and shouldn't feel guilty Listen to those words, they're right on the money. I don't think I could have put it better myself. There's only one thing I'd like to add. This is one of those situations where you as the male cannot just take over and fix everything. I know if you really care about someone, it's difficult to watch them hurt, but it's also hard to accept that there's only so much you can do. Some good sites are afterabortion.org and afterabortion.com. Afterabortion.com has a decent section, including message boards and articles, regarding approaches for men and relatives... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WISE Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Adoption. you don't want the kid, there are so many people who do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fugazi Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Originally posted by XxSugarxX If you don't want to be held accountable for your actions, and don't want to maybe face consequences later in life, then DONT HAVE SEX. On point. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 Originally posted by WISE Adoption. you don't want the kid, there are so many people who do. fuck that. there are way too many kids who are taken from abusive homes you don't need to be adding to the fostercare roster. having the kid and giving it away is not a solution. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D3N53one Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 responsibility, dont fuck unless you want children dont write graff and you wont go to jail. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest HESHIANDET Posted June 27, 2003 Share Posted June 27, 2003 this got good towards the end. thanks for the advice. homegirl seems to be doing ok. maybe shes hiding it. who knows. i love her. mah shortyyyyyyyyyyyyy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
When Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 Originally posted by Kettiecat having the kid and giving it away is not a solution. explain yourself. Originally posted by Tease fuck that man, when you give a kid up for adoption, like 9/10 become super stars an shit and then you'll have to kill yourself for letting them live... that would be me... take that mom! ha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 I'm against it because there are plently of children already out there, already born, who need good homes. I WAS ONE OF THEM. The American foster care system is plagued with problems ranging from overwhelming numbers to neglect and sexual abuse. Why would you want to add to that by taking away a prospective parent? Why would you want to run the risk of your child not being adopted ASAP and having to be put in one of those homes and bounced around for the next god only knows how many years? I don't know what it is like to know that your parents "gave you away" so I can't comment on those feels. But I do know what its is like to be taken away. That it hurts to know you have siblings you don't remember. It sucks when you have to fill out family trees, predict your blood type, talk about what genes you've gotten from which parent, to not know your families medical history, little stupid stuff. It sucks to read court files about your life. When you have half siblings contacting you, there are no social guidelines for these feelings you have to work them out on your own, I would never put a child in my situation. That is just my opinion. I know plenty of people, most people I'm sure, who think that as long as the child goes straight to the adoptive parents everythign is all fine. And there is some truth to that, most people who are adoptive live normal or above normal lives. But it is not a perfect solution. And there is emotional baggage attached. When the world is already over populated, there are already children out there who need homes, I think bringing another unwanted person into this world is wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fugazi Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 Originally posted by Kettiecat I'm against it because there are plently of children already out there, already born, who need good homes. The American foster care system is plagued with problems ranging from overwhelming numbers to neglect and sexual abuse. Why would you want to add to that by taking away a prospective parent? Why would you want to run the risk of your child not being adopted ASAP and having to be put in one of those homes and bounced around for the next god only knows how many years? I don't know what it is like to know that your parents "gave you away" so I can't comment on those feels. But I do know what its is like to be taken away. That it hurts to know you have siblings you don't remember. It sucks when you have to fill out family trees, predict your blood type, talk about what genes you've gotten from which parent, to not know your families medical history, little stupid stuff. It sucks to read court files about your life. When you have half siblings contacting you, there are no social guidelines for these feelings you have to work them out on your own, I would never put a child in my situation. That is just my opinion. I know plenty of people, most people I'm sure, who think that as long as the child goes straight to the adoptive parents everythign is all fine. And there is some truth to that, most people who are adoptive live normal or above normal lives. But it is not a perfect solution. And there is emotional baggage attached. When the world is already over populated, there are already children out there who need homes, I think bringing another unwanted person into this world is wrong. Yeah, I think the kid's are better off sucked out of their mother's womb with a vacuum. :rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sadangry Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 I actually have a bunch of friends that were adopted, and the parents were/are amazing people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alure Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 Originally posted by sadangry I actually have a bunch of friends that were adopted, and the parents were/are amazing people. I'm adopted, I have 6 adopted cousins, 3 out of 4 of my closest friends are adopted......and the list goes on. Yes, there are wonderful people out there who adopt children, my parents are two of them. My point was that when you have a kid for the sole reason of giving it up you are taking those potential wonderful parents away from children that are already in this world. Originally posted by Quiet Riot stop trying to act like an educated person This response makes no sense. Either what I typed was intelligent or it wasn’t. Based off the way you phrased your response I imagine that you thought it was intelligent and this was your attempt at some sort of insult. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Parted Ways Posted June 28, 2003 Share Posted June 28, 2003 ok, so i'm a little late to voice my opinion though everyone is not going to read it. it has probably been said already but i just skimmed through it. abortion to adoption. w00t i am against abortion to an extent. if you wore protection and the condom or whatever breaks, get an abortion if you want. if you got raped, get an abortion if you want. if you had unprotected sex and got pregnant and decided to get an abortion, commit suicide. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
When Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 Originally posted by Kettiecat I'm against it because there are plently of children already out there, already born, who need good homes. I WAS ONE OF THEM. The American foster care system is plagued with problems ranging from overwhelming numbers to neglect and sexual abuse. Why would you want to add to that by taking away a prospective parent? Why would you want to run the risk of your child not being adopted ASAP and having to be put in one of those homes and bounced around for the next god only knows how many years? I don't know what it is like to know that your parents "gave you away" so I can't comment on those feels. But I do know what its is like to be taken away. That it hurts to know you have siblings you don't remember. It sucks when you have to fill out family trees, predict your blood type, talk about what genes you've gotten from which parent, to not know your families medical history, little stupid stuff. It sucks to read court files about your life. When you have half siblings contacting you, there are no social guidelines for these feelings you have to work them out on your own, I would never put a child in my situation. That is just my opinion. I know plenty of people, most people I'm sure, who think that as long as the child goes straight to the adoptive parents everythign is all fine. And there is some truth to that, most people who are adoptive live normal or above normal lives. But it is not a perfect solution. And there is emotional baggage attached. When the world is already over populated, there are already children out there who need homes, I think bringing another unwanted person into this world is wrong. so just because you had a bad time in fostercare, i should have been aborted? i think not. maybe my mother though it was better for me to live than end up in a biohazard bin i sure think it was and you know what, in your second paragraph after your initial statement... i have to deal with that also, its honestly not that tough and its pretty nice to have to deal with that 'stupid stuff' i belive it makes me a stronger person, because i dont know my family history, i get to create my own its a pretty fuckin great feeling yes im aware that your whole deal here is that youre bitter over your experience and the only advice i can give you is look at it in a positive light you obviously were taken from your parents for a reason and it probably was a damn good one so suck it up and continue on with your life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dojafx Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 Originally posted by Vanity he's talking about when they have a leaky stankbox and he can't stick em for the cream :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kettiecat Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 Originally posted by When so just because you had a bad time in fostercare, i should have been aborted? i think not. maybe my mother though it was better for me to live than end up in a biohazard bin i sure think it was and you know what, in your second paragraph after your initial statement... i have to deal with that also, its honestly not that tough and its pretty nice to have to deal with that 'stupid stuff' i belive it makes me a stronger person, because i dont know my family history, i get to create my own its a pretty fuckin great feeling yes im aware that your whole deal here is that youre bitter over your experience and the only advice i can give you is look at it in a positive light you obviously were taken from your parents for a reason and it probably was a damn good one so suck it up and continue on with your life ???????????? WTF Actually my fostercare parents weren't bad. I was lucky. 98% of the time you're right being adopted is cool. "I was chosen" Damn straight I was taken from my real parents for a good reason, some people should not be allowed to have kids. I think my parents should have aborted both me and my siblings, they chose not to and their lives went into the shitter. Children don't stay with the same set of foster parents for too long. They get bumped around alot. There are plenty of studies done to show the negative effect that has on a child. There is not enough people willing to adopt compared to the number of children put up for adoption. I don't believe adding to one problem is a good solution to another. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
!@#$% Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 i don't know much about foster care, but aren't the majority of those kids over the age of 2? at that point, abortion is a pretty stale option..fools shoulda been thinking about sterilization, abstinence, or even that crazy shit birth control.. people make mistakes and have children even when their life isn't perfect...because there is never a right time to have a child..the world is always in turmoil.... there is some hope for kids raised in foster care, although yes, prolly few stay with the foster parents.. but when kids are adopted at birth, my feeling tells me that they are usually kept.. i know several adopted kids, and more adoptive parents..not one of those people has abandoned, or been abandoned.. life is hard as fuck and yes, sometimes it's easy to say "i never should have even been here" but that's the EASY WAY OUT because life is hard as hell!! and although a supportive family unit makes it better, not all families are like that..some (biological) families fuck their kids up royally as well...sometimes even rich families who have all the resources in the world. life is hard. for everyone. find what you love, and sow the seeds all over your own environment your parents won't be there when you die either..at some point, you have to control your own destiny Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scumdog Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 when my ex-girlfriend had this done it fucked her up bad she was always in pain for like 4-5 months.it fucked both our heads up in the end. it really is not a nice situation to be in.i always wonder what if......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mental invalid Posted June 30, 2003 Share Posted June 30, 2003 heh hesh....been through it twice..... email me or call me at the casa if you need anything...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scumdog Posted July 2, 2003 Share Posted July 2, 2003 i might take you up on that .i never told anyone that shit or even talk about it with her. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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