12oz embarassing moments megathread

[Suber Giraffe]

i dunno...i been on both, and i love fucking acid...but i been in some weird situations, and all i ever did was laugh and touch shit

 

yea

for some reasons i get anxiety with boomers, but everytime i drop acid i just laugh my ass off and listen to music

[tha whut]

showerin everyday is a waste of water

[penmanship]

Go green. Do you use your hand to wipe your ass too? And then just wipe your hand in the grass to save on water from washing your hands.

[penmanship]

He spent four hours at the base waiting for her to show up today. He says next weekend they're going cave building to sleep out in. If it happens I might follow their tracks out and throw a snow boulder on the roof in the middle of the night. IF it happens.

[CONCRETE RIVER]

nah, im 26. all im saying is that i dont stink up so easy.

 

I'm fairly sure that most people who have B.O. Cant smell their own odor. Just sayin..this aint France.

[somekat]

Please... more pics of strange habits of the weird guy like him standing in front of the tv for an hour. Classic. And pics of the girl would be hilarious.

[..romero..]

i had to take the GED test recently and one of the guidelines was that your not at all allowed to leave the room under any circumstances once the test has begun.that day i had a large breakfast that consisted of 3 hard boiled eggs,4 saugage links,chocolate milk and coffee so that i could stay awake long enough to complete the test(i didnt sleep well the night before)...this proved to be a horrible combination on test day because i spent 3 hours sittting in a room that was dead quiet trying to hold back an onslaught of massive egg farts,which we all know are some of the stinkiest,not to mention the coffee was giving me some horrid stomach problems.my stomach was churning and making all these horrible sounds.finally i got tired of holdeing it in and tried to sneak a fart,unfortunately i was unable to.the 2 hours or so of holding back countless farts had built up to the point that when i let one rip they all shot out at once making this horrible prolonged fart.atleast 5 seconds long.as you might have guessed this caused quite alot of long horrified stares in my direction.wats worse is that the room we were testing in was quite small so the fart lingered in the room and traveled to all corners.so for about half an hour everyone at the ged testing had to sit and enjoy the god awful smell of my bowels.it was suuuuuper embarrassing but who gives a fuck because every one in their were fat losers who had no future anyways so fuck what they think...

 

 

my story

[injury]

sit and enjoy the god awful smell of my bowels.it was suuuuuper embarrassing but who gives a fuck because every one in their were fat losers who had no future anyways so fuck what they think...

 

:lol: :lol: :lol:

[penmanship]

Every year during exams I'd always have that happen to me or to someone around me. But I generally to the who gives a fuck approach and would make them last as long as possible. But our exams would be in three hundred plus people with the same no leaving rules so ten or fifteen mega farts would happen every exam from somewhere in the crowd. Farts still make me giggle.

[LUGR]

Why the fuck would anyone not shower for a week in the first place

 

Fuck yeah BLACK OPS, best HQ score: 81k 16d. best hardcore S&D score 15k 0d. best demolition score 46k 0d. FN FAL and L96A1 for core, COMMANDO and PSG1 for hardcore, KIPARIS for hardcore S&D.kill streaks: attack helicopter,chopper gunner,attack dogs.. perks: ghost pro,slight of hand pro,hacker pro.................COME AT ME BRO................

:huh:

[a_fiend]

Oh shit, just look at all these losers hanging to talk shit to a guy they've never met hoping to impress some other guys they've never met.Yeah i own at COD, i also go to school, ride 3 hours a day and paint most nights.I stay fit as fuck, and since i quit smoking, drinking, eating bad food and all that bad stuff i fucking smell like roses.You guys just stink because your all fat fucks slurpin down burgers.I'll leave it at that ladies,have a good one.

[Swindle]

lol, where do you paint?

[injury]

you tag bro?

[LUGR]

tag and stink

[penmanship]

Oh shit, just look at all these losers hanging to talk shit to a guy they've never met hoping to impress some other guys they've never met.Yeah i own at COD, i also go to school, ride 3 hours a day and paint most nights.I stay fit as fuck, and since i quit smoking, drinking, eating bad food and all that bad stuff i fucking smell like roses.You guys just stink because your all fat fucks slurpin down burgers.I'll leave it at that ladies,have a good one.

 

I've never smoked, haven't had a drink in six years, and have a physically laborious job with 12 hour shifts. I'm not fat, and will eat healthy shit most days. Despite me having the same argument as you, I will smell horrid after a week of not showering. You're exactly like the mother fucker I live with. we drove a groomer down the hill the other day, and he jumped in with us. and we had to make him get out. He didn't understand why. The same as you don't understand proper hygiene. I said fuck off with your immaturity if you've really lived 26 years. Grow the fuck up.

 

also:

 

you tag bro?

 

[hotsauceinthedickholewastaken]

i had to take the GED test recently and one of the guidelines was that your not at all allowed to leave the room under any circumstances once the test has begun.that day i had a large breakfast that consisted of 3 hard boiled eggs,4 saugage links,chocolate milk and coffee so that i could stay awake long enough to complete the test(i didnt sleep well the night before)...this proved to be a horrible combination on test day because i spent 3 hours sittting in a room that was dead quiet trying to hold back an onslaught of massive egg farts,which we all know are some of the stinkiest,not to mention the coffee was giving me some horrid stomach problems.my stomach was churning and making all these horrible sounds.finally i got tired of holdeing it in and tried to sneak a fart,unfortunately i was unable to.the 2 hours or so of holding back countless farts had built up to the point that when i let one rip they all shot out at once making this horrible prolonged fart.atleast 5 seconds long.as you might have guessed this caused quite alot of long horrified stares in my direction.wats worse is that the room we were testing in was quite small so the fart lingered in the room and traveled to all corners.so for about half an hour everyone at the ged testing had to sit and enjoy the god awful smell of my bowels.it was suuuuuper embarrassing but who gives a fuck because every one in their were fat losers who had no future anyways so fuck what they think...

 

 

my story

 

I moved into a new city and started grade 9. First day I'm there I had to register at the office and then they walked me to math class which was already in progress. I sat down in the full class room and immediately farted...like what the fuck was wrong with me. Loud as hell too. Everyone looked at me, so I made fart noises with my hands. So instead of thinking I was a total pig, they just thought I was a retard for making fart noises with my hand.

 

Funny how when you get older you don't get embarrassed by shit like that anymore. I'll drop ass when I need to.

[hotsauceinthedickholewastaken]

this one takes place in the dorms at my school when i lived there...this was told to me the next afternoon after this happened, when i was finally able to grasp what was going on, since when this incident took place while i was very, very drunk...this was after a night of heavy drinking, and according to my roomate at the time, i just got up out of my bed, turned around (not facing him) and took a piss right next to my bed, just on to the floor, making a big puddle underneath the bed... my roomate, laying there with his girl, said he was like "dude, what are you doing? what..what are? no..no, dude, stop...dude, aw..dude, c'mon, aw man..."

 

and the same shit happened at my brothers, only i got right up to the bathroom but just pissed on the bathroom door...i must have some sort of drunken urinary syndrome of some sort

 

I do this all the time and have talked to countless others that have done it. PISSDRUNKFUCKERONERS

[ManyCrimes]

The other day I was in the smoke shop with a couple friends and we were all just kinda standing around lookin at all the stuff. I sag my pants a little, but I guess they were just saggin a little too low for the moment and fell right down to my ankles. Hahaha luckily only my girlfriend and my brother saw me, but it was still embarrassing and it could've been worse, there was a decent amount of people in there.

[blood fart]

You sag your pants?

In this day and age?

 

 

 

NERD.

[hotsauceinthedickholewastaken]

sag in pants??? like you shit yourself??

[street villain]

^ haha!!

[da1lyoperations]

Stolen, I lol'd

 

[pissdrunkwhat?!]

C'MON SON....

[john_gacy]

His handle is 'titbarf' lol

[nsmbfan]

i just posted in brickslayers in an NYC thread

 

said chi town respect

 

LOL

 

 

fuckin pinot

[nsmbfan]

I moved into a new city and started grade 9. First day I'm there I had to register at the office and then they walked me to math class which was already in progress. I sat down in the full class room and immediately farted...like what the fuck was wrong with me. Loud as hell too. Everyone looked at me, so I made fart noises with my hands. So instead of thinking I was a total pig, they just thought I was a retard for making fart noises with my hand.

 

Funny how when you get older you don't get embarrassed by shit like that anymore. I'll drop ass when I need to.

 

FUCKING THIS LOL

 

:lol: :lol:

 

 

wtf

[vivouno]

i lol'd at the titbarf story..........

[metronome]

So I got pretty pissed up at a hockey game the other night ... damn arena beers... and me and my old lady came home after being at the bar a few hours after this game gets out. I guess I was really drunk, I tried to overpay the cab, tried to talk him into kicking my fiance out the cab and making her walk (??? can't explain that one ... ) and so on, and so forth...

fast forward a couple hours and we've both been asleep a little while after we got home, and I guess I woke up to piss in the middle of the night and instead of going to our ensuite bathroom I just opened the bedroom door and pissed into the hallway :lol:

completely out of character for me. I've never done anything like that before, no matter HOW drunk I've been... :lol:

[Weapon X]

first day of basic training I had to shit real bad, all day, and I wasn't gonna dare to ask to use the "latrine" so I held it thinking when we got back to the barracks I would run and shit. I was infantry and my company comander and first seargant decided that we were going to get an early start on training and had our first field excersise within a couple hours of getting there day 1 right after the shark tank. for those of you that dont know what that is its when you go from reception where you get all your shots and uniforms, and the drills dont really fuck with you or yell at you or make you do any pushups. then you go down range. well my reception company lasted damn near 3 weeks waiting for basic to start, so 3 weeks of relaxed shit you think man this is a joke. then you are greeted by 20-50 drills carrying 80-120 pounds of shit screaming in your face calling you a fucking (insert what you want here) and flipping the fuck out. throwing all your paperwork, and all your belongings and mixing it up with everyones elses shit, then giving you 15 seconds to find your shit.

 

anyway our first field excersise was various tasks on this big muddy hill. carrying these 40 pound metal boxes up and down the hill, placing them where drills once stood, stupid memory shit under stress. also, another task was moving wounded and the dead. so you got these old scholl vietnam gourneys, and you got 2 guys carrying one guy down the muddy hill, and then back up, timed, while also trying to do it fast than the other 3 teams of guys you are competing against. of course the guy we had to carry was a "fat body" and heavy as fuck. down the hill, no problem, up the hill...

 

I farted once and thought fuck here we go. so I just let one go, and sharted. it wasn't really sharting, more like full on shitting myself after a fart. made it up the hill, and approached my senior drill seargant. he looked at me and asked what the fuck is your problem private? I replied I just shit my drawers. now mind if I would of said I just shit my drawers drill seargant everything would of been fine, but I didn't say drill seargant. next thing I know I am surrounded by drills screaming at me for disrespecting my senior drill seargant, all the while he is laughing his ass off. I got to go change but I could smell shit all day till we showered. mind you the first 3 weeks of basic, we got anywhere from 20-40 seconds a night to shower, so you had to choose wisely what you washed. good times.

 

[Weapon X]

I won't even drink beers at the ACC or any sporting venue. Last time I got drunk I had a good time, met Steve Mason's parents, and threatened an usher, but I don't remember the game or the walk back to my buddy's car.