redeyedanimal Posted November 4, 2013 Share Posted November 4, 2013 Actual friends, eh? Don't find those much in this type of living... Tapering off of klonopin, it helped when I needed it, now I don't need it anymore. Time to stop. Marijuana intake reduced to nights only, to help with sleep and because I enjoy it. Booze.... Still my weak spot, I can make it a couple days then I'm back off to the races. Fake it till you make it? Maybe... Or just go ahead and make the decision and take the right action. Im doing ok, not great, but better than last year at this time. Time for a meeting, first one in years. Everybody, head up, chin up, one blood. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 i don't drink much during the week but yesterday was the start of an all day drinking binge with my bowling league starting. i put in a good 10hrs of drinking on sunday. then this afternoon i felt my heart start racing, i looked it up online and its holiday heart. my normal heart rate is usually around the low 40's but i checked with my heart rate monitor and it was up to 81. shit freaked me out. im not in bad shape or anything, im usually putting in 100-120 miles a week on the bike weather permitting, but i think the binge drinking days are pretty much numbered for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Decyferon Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 Ive been having crazy panic attacks before work recently just due to stress. Have tried to cut out drinking but when I am stressed out it seems to help but obviously I know in the long run it doesn't TDB been real helpful in helping me deal with my stress etc but I still can't help going on binges, I know why I do it just have to be more aware of myself so I don't constantly go on binges of rum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brothhalynch Posted November 5, 2013 Share Posted November 5, 2013 not drunk yet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brothhalynch Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 getting drunk yeah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 end of the month 6 years without a drink 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleazeside Heights Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 you go Ralph! that's seriously awesome. thing of all the damage you avoided placing on your body. congrats dude! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Premium Account User Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 congrats ralphy, 6 years is fucking insane! impossible to imagine, really no dope no pills been clean after a couple fuck ups in the last year been doing coke but not regularly, being Careful ha ha ha drinking every day best thing has been working as much as possible, being busy all day and physically exhausted in the evening is the best prevention ive discovered so far -cus Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted November 8, 2013 Share Posted November 8, 2013 Dope effort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatDrawingBitch Posted November 9, 2013 Share Posted November 9, 2013 All y'all deserve props for your effort. Seriously. Decy, you're doing fine hon. Now I know what is stressing you deeply I can help with it. You're not alone. You know. Ralphy - all the fuck yeahs man, xbillions. For me - I like the tiny level of pissed when Im out that gives me The Game. I am hating the blackouts, and they are getting fewer and further between. I have also realised a lot of it is to do with tiredness tbf - even out on the last with mates it's a ccoyple cans at home, couple cans out, wiped out from uni so home by 1 after food. Getting slowly better. This new place, my own flat... allof it helping. Art kicking off. All good. Not letting that slide and with every good thing that happens it gets easier to drink less and be myself more. Big binge last week tho, to cope with emotions. Big thing happened, I handled, it was not good but not bad. It worked. Baby steps. Gotta stop hiding from this thread when I think I failed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted November 9, 2013 Share Posted November 9, 2013 end of the month 6 years without a drink Muss spred repz E-creds are as good as 6 years of having your life back, right? That's all I can offer. And thanks for being that real dude, my shits not straight but you've helped me several times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sayWORD? Posted November 10, 2013 Share Posted November 10, 2013 hey homies, long time no talk. been doing great, just finished another work year (6 months) and life has slowed down for me considerably. drank once in the last 3 months. sorta terrified that if i let myself get into the more regular routine of drinking, ill end up back at square one. met the love of my life (WITHOUT BEING DRUNK) and she has helped me out unbelievably. i cant lie, i was blown away by how attractive (inside and out) this girl was and immediately realized that my past lifestyle would be a huge turnoff for her. she reminded me that there was only merit in me quitting for ME, not for her, and im grateful for that. shits been a blessing and its refreshing to be consuming my time doing positive sober activities that i had thought id outgrown or was no longer interested in. have i lost some people over these last few months trying to get sober? absolutely. started to realize that alot of the "friends" i had been hanging around were moreso drinking partners than solid companions. i still care for most of these people, just dont care to be around them regularly. it sucks, but at the end of the day i need to do me. look out for number one ya know? does SM still post in here? i know this forum has hit a bit of a bumpy road as of late, but she helped me out alot with positive pms and such, just wanted to say thanks. i know she checks (or used to check) this thread alot. i appreciate each and every one of you who sent kind words and encouragement when i was in a rough spot a year ago. my life has gotten alot better and id like to pay it forward. thank you very much guys and girls, i honestly feel like you all played a huge role in opening my eyes to my situation and i feel blessed that i could come onto this thread and express how low i was feeling and get advice. i still have a long way to go. but i can breathe now. -sW 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted November 11, 2013 Share Posted November 11, 2013 end of the month 6 years without a drink enormous props and sincerest congrats. thank you for being a fixture in this thread and helping a lot of us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GettinLaid Posted November 11, 2013 Share Posted November 11, 2013 The line between support and enabling is so thin that I think it is better to err on the side of less rather than more support. Actual friends, eh? Don't find those much in this type of living... growing up around addicts, i would like to think i know the line between enabling and supporting. this one particular, I know we are actual friends-have been supportive through many aspects. distance, i would like to believe, keeps me from being an enabler, so support is all i can offer. communications have been cut from hours a day of talking/texting....and very open and honest about wanting to use/and slipping. now my friend has completely relapsed and communication has dwindled down to a few words of texts a day. there are moments I wanna blow up the phone in hopes of them picking up just to hear it in their voice, whether they are high or not.....but im afraid the constant buggin will drive them further... on the other hand...what if they dont think i care enough to check up on the nurga? just at a loss. whinin like a biotch. but just want to do the right thing. Congrats ralph-hope that keeps motivating others. sW= keep pushin man. as long as your sobriety is for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~KRYLON2~ Posted November 12, 2013 Share Posted November 12, 2013 still hungover and i stopped drinking after the bears game. i think im getting old, and hopefully this dosn't turn into a two day headache Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sleazeside Heights Posted November 13, 2013 Share Posted November 13, 2013 realizing the reason i drink is because it numbs dealing with reality, an off switch in a sense. rather than deal with it in a clear mentality. Bugging about the future instead of just letting it happen. I see how impatient i am sometimes, and how I just can't shrug things off. work brings out a real mean streak in me that makes me want to dull it at the bar, but it also shows me the great qualities of myself that shine while sober. day and night. Struggling yet again, but taking personal inventory to determine what's going on in a very introspective way. a constant battle. I've been trying hard to make little goals and getting where I need to be. I've moved like 4 times this year, and again in a few months. Gotta deal with my health problems(another I've been ignoring through booze, ignorantly ignoring to shut out the realness of other heavy things coming down.) gotta take some tests and see if i'm ok. Just been feeling symptoms, and trying to cover them with booze. If they come back positive, I'll have to not drink for another month. That's fine, maybe it'll kick me into shape again, I just don't want it to be what it is. denial is a mofo. Just airing my dirty laundry...trying to get a better grasp on what's going on. It can be confusing, I'm sure you all know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted November 13, 2013 Share Posted November 13, 2013 From my personal experience, with the benefit of hindsight, I will posit that there is nothing confusing at all about the situation itself, only the interpretation. Which is one of the thing I never liked about the 12 step program to be honest, there are some nice reflections in the work but is so often over hyped and over thought. Best regards Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 realizing the reason i drink is because it numbs dealing with reality, an off switch in a sense. rather than deal with it in a clear mentality. sometimes i deeply miss being able to distract myself from reality... you're not alone in feeling this way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+plus+ Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 got drunk went bombing last night been real emotional friend hung himself in his fucking front yard heart been racing all day, time for a break from the booze Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+plus+ Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 feel stupid for not trusting my gut instinct not to drink some nights but once i start theres no stopping shits fucked Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brothhalynch Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 always chuggin cant stop Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 Shit go +++. Found a friend giving it a go and had to call the ambo's n what not a couple of days ago. She has a kid and all. Stay up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Highlife Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 I'm debating going to a AA meeting but I don't think I can do it sober. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted November 14, 2013 Share Posted November 14, 2013 Just don't be fucked up when you go. And for what it's worth, if that's where you're at right now, NA might be a better place to head to. But we're all different. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted November 15, 2013 Share Posted November 15, 2013 give it a shot, leave if you get uncomfortable. it happens all the time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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