injury Posted December 22, 2013 Share Posted December 22, 2013 plenty of company in going out & coming back lugr good to see you back regardless of circumstances. on dating: i've resolved to repair existing friendships and form new ones long before i make a serious effort to date someone i care about again. sponsor confirmed that was his experience too. gotta talk to the cute ones to stay sharp, always. but family & friends first. also don't think i'm ready/prepared to be that vulnerable with someone yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LUGR Posted December 29, 2013 Share Posted December 29, 2013 So far so good. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PITOFZOMBIES Posted January 12, 2014 Share Posted January 12, 2014 Kind of stupid, but insight is insight. It's pretty easy to see how the stresses of being in the spotlight could lead you toward alcoholism. Some of these folks are respectable humans despite pop culture being largely a joke. Sober Celebrities Also... been lurking reddit's sober subforum some... much like this, but more traffic. http://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 [/img] still aint drunk motherfuckers......stay up Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 Also... been lurking reddit's sober subforum some... much like this, but more traffic. http://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/ fan of this community/group. you all still doing alright? 7 months in a week here, dealing with myself day in day out still makes cold beers tempting sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted January 13, 2014 Share Posted January 13, 2014 I'm hopping on the wagon, went out on a fifth of tequila last night, didnt feel hung over at all today, just couldn't focus and shit yellow water. Turns out after a long time of excessive drinking, the pancreas starts to fuck up, as does the gall bladder. This is happening to me. My pancreas is no longer producing the chemicals that help my stomach digest foods, so I am also not a properly absorbing minerals, nutrients, or vitamins. I am making a doc apppointment to check my a1c levels and see if I have drank myself into a pre-diabetic state, it pretty fucking scary honestly. My liver enzymes last time were twice the high range, GGT levels over 150. The clean life is something I have never fully signed on to. I have always felt like alcohol and weed are "just part of who I am", I guess it's time to make a new personal identity. It's not easy to give up something you love, even when you know it's for the better. And, scarily enough, it's still hard to give up even though I have scientific proof that it is killing me. Wonk saggin. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shittles..TasteTheAsshole Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 Glad to see you guys trying. I made it through my second new year without a sip, lookin' forward to 2 years alcohol free this summer. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 Godammit. I'm one of those people that feels like I have to be the very best at what I do, and I just got a new job where I am back on the bottom of the hierarchy. It's awesome for learning things the way that they are actually supposed to be done, but it requires a total removal of my pride and ego, which is very difficult. That being said, I'm drinking a glass of wine right now, that I fermented and bottled myself, and may finish the be bottle if I don't fall asleep first. Triggers are a bitch, but I am starting to understand my character flaws which lead to my triggers. Fake it till you make it? It's fucking frustrating being determined to do something and it only lasts a couple days at best. Suggestions? I'm going to start going to meetings again, so anything else is welcome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Premium Account User Posted January 15, 2014 Share Posted January 15, 2014 you are a chef, so i know you love to eat and enjoy food more than most. imagine how fucking annoying and restrictive being diabetic at a young age would be for you, and maybe your career? in a way you are lucky, because your body is actually telling you directly just how irresponsible you are being and what is going to happen if you dont change course. you no longer have the privilege of entertaining the addicts fantasy of 'maybe I will be okay' . heed the flashing lights before you run headfirst into certain disaster. good luck 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 17, 2014 Share Posted January 17, 2014 Stay up red, dope opportunity. Embrace it for all that it means. Someone saw something in you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 The new gig is keeping me on a much straighter path, I don't touch anything other than what is prescribed to me, at less than the prescribed dose, during the day. Within two months I should be completely off of this med, it served its purpose and I done with it now. At night, I've been having two glasses of wine and some herbage, but compared to where I was even a month ago, my mind is in a better place, which means my self medicating has also subsided. And my urge to drink has practically gone into remission. When I wake up in the morning, I ask my higher power (mom) to remove my desire to get drunk for that day. She always listened to me, and always protected me, and still does, Life is good right now, I haven't been this happy in a long time. Also, have I been around here so long that people actually know me? I still feel like a lurker, like my other account... Lol. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 And my urge to drink has practically gone into remission. You sound full of shit to me. I think you need to get over yourself and start with 24 hours free of all mind altering substances. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CILONE/SK Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 I wouldn't say he is full of shit. I would say he has some self assessment issues to work out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 but it requires a total removal of my pride and ego, which is very difficult. Triggers are a bitch, but I am starting to understand my character flaws which lead to my triggers. Fake it till you make it? It's fucking frustrating being determined to do something and it only lasts a couple days at best. Suggestions? I'm going to start going to meetings again, so anything else is welcome. The new gig is keeping me on a much straighter path, I don't touch anything other than what is prescribed to me, at less than the prescribed dose, during the day. Within two months I should be completely off of this med, it served its purpose and I done with it now. At night, I've been having two glasses of wine and some herbage, but compared to where I was even a month ago, my mind is in a better place, which means my self medicating has also subsided. And my urge to drink has practically gone into remission. When I wake up in the morning, I ask my higher power (mom) to remove my desire to get drunk for that day. She always listened to me, and always protected me, and still does, i dunno man. i'm jealous you can keep it to two glasses of wine and cork it and be done for the night as that's not something i can do. and it seems like the new gig is going well so far. i see you enjoying the immediate benefits of *not* drinking all the time. but there'll come a day when you'll have a shitty day at work, and maybe it'll even be your fault. those triggers. and not getting fucked up that day or night - that's the challenge. sober or not i wish the best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Am I missing something here? If I follow correctly on the 12th of January which was not even a week ago red was saying that he has drank himself to the point of serious long term damage to his internal organs and is embarking on an attempt to be sober. Now he is fronting that having "two glasses" of wine per night along with getting stoned and popping a couple k-pins is the new healthy path for him. First off a bottle of wine only has like three glasses in it, drinking a bottle of wine every night is a long way from healthy for a guy who is worried about his fucking organs, the pharmies do not help either and being strung on them will do a lot more harm to any anxiety problems than they will help. The amount of intellectual craftsmanship we put into convincing ourselves that we can be normal is fucking amazing. I got news for you Red, if you are portraying yourself honestly, the evidence indicates that you are indeed one of us, you will never be some normal fucker having a nice glass of malbec that pairs well with rare beef. The wires have been crossed and they stay that way, the way forward is to leave drugs and alcohol behind. Of course I am just calling it like I see it, maybe you can recapture that magic that happened so many years ago when highs were new and consequences few, if you crack the code let me know, I could use a drink sometimes myself. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redeyedanimal Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Yeah, I like to say what I think when I think imon here. It's obvious that I am one of the pickles, even to me. I use this thread as a sort of a journal, so if you read me ranting, it is what I am thinking, unfiltered and unedited. Take it as an insight into the mind of an addict. Even when I ask for suggestions, I rarely listen to them. When I make changes in my life, it is because I have decided I have to, not because som faceless name responded to my rant online. My real conversations are with my therapist, family, and support system. This is where I post all my fucked up thoughts. Yes, my pancreas is reacting to alcohol, but it is not permanently damaged. No, I am not prediabetic. These were only things that I created in my own head. Sickness. So yes, use me as a scapegoat. And if anyone reading this is unsure if you are a pickle, if you think like me, you probably have the allergy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 150mL a glass. Preaching to the choir my dude. But on a serious side, can we try and keep attacks in here at a minimum. I have respect for everyone contributing in here. We're all different, but we have a common enemy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CILONE/SK Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 He said he was full of shit, but I didn't take that as an attack. I took that as him calling out conflicting posts. I think it was, for the most part, warranted. Given that dude did post different shit and Hightower not have realized the differences in the posts. Can't really be supportive of him, if he is all over the place in his posts. Either way, props for at least posting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CILONE/SK Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Must spread props before I can give to red again, 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morton Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 My posts on this topic are not meant to be attacks, but to point out what I perceive to be a failure of logic caused primarily by being in the mist of active addiction. Blind support does not often actually help. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 18, 2014 Share Posted January 18, 2014 Just have mad respect for anyone willing to be in this thread is all. I agree with all of you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Premium Account User Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 real talk in here good advice morton Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThatDrawingBitch Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 I have been doing a lot better. A lot calmer. Back to a couple beers here and there, or wine with dinner. Occasional blow out. I need to keep eating and sometimes the booze gets in the way of that so... yeah. Baby steps, no pressure, just one day after the other. Glad to hear how you're all gettin on in 2014. Props to spread. Stay up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 my naggers if you are an alcoholic....to the point you put your life in jeopardy than you shouldn't be drinking period. if you are able to sip a lil bit here and there than chances are you dont have a problem with drinking. the thread topic is alcoholism and therefore I guess all posts are appropriate but for those of you who are really fucking sauce addicts like me don't let anyone posting here lead you astray, you can't drink. bottom line. people who control their drinking are not alcoholics. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 truth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted January 19, 2014 Share Posted January 19, 2014 "admitting we were powerless over alcohol, and that our lives had become unmanageable" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ugene Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 4 months 2 days ago, making an amends with my dad today. the promises are coming true my dudes. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theprotester Posted January 22, 2014 Share Posted January 22, 2014 Nice work, Ugene. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
injury Posted January 23, 2014 Share Posted January 23, 2014 4 months 2 days ago, making an amends with my dad today. the promises are coming true my dudes. word, just made mine to my dad the other day too. congrats on 4 months man. keep it up everyone. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fat ralphy Posted January 25, 2014 Share Posted January 25, 2014 making amends to my dad was one of the hardest i have done.... or should i say i thought it would be the hardest, it ended up being easy and freed me up from a lot of stuff. i had to pay him back bread from getting over on him and being the bigger man and apologizing for some of the bad parts of the past brought us back together. this was a guy who i have gone years at a time not talking to. props ugene and inj..... stay sober naggers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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