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Step8

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so I tried to dry out a little today from the opiates, so I got drunk. it worked and i fell asleep around midnight, woke up fucking restless and crunchy and feeling like shit around 330am when the drunk wore off and there was no dope in my system. now im sitting here, cant sleep, whole body on some restless leg shit. but im not puking, so congrats?

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Question, figured you guys would be good place to ask:

 

I've broken my leg and am consuming around 60mg of both immediate& extended release oxycontin a day...this seems like a lot and even after 5 days I'm building up a tolerance. The nurse and Dr's say you can't develop any tolerance that soon, but common drugs are so subjective and I know my body and the oc's are not working like they used to. How long did you guys who used the oxy's find they were effective before you had to adjust the dosage?

 

Honestly I don't know how people find this to be enjoyable.

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unfortunately I'm not sure how good my advice can be, considering you are taking them FOR PAIN so your experience of the drug is drastically different than mine. for people with legit chronic/serious pain, ive heard the high with these drugs is really kind of whatever. 5 days seems pretty fast to build a tolerance though. sorry that was totally unhelpful

 

you could ask them to switch you to a different kind of painkiller?

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I found slight tolerance for it after a week, i switched to morphine after that for another 3 weeks, and then nursed off of that with slow and long release Oxy's. It was for a pretty serious surgery I had, I was a complete asshole to everyone I knew and glad im out of the woods.

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vicodin/hydrocodone does absolutely nothing to me....as far as a high goes.

 

as a kid one time, maybe 12 years old i took like 6 or more pills and i was fucking loaded, visuals trails....now nothing. i have had 500mg vicodins prescribed for neck pains and i can take two and dont feel shit.

 

oxy is something i have never foxed with.

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y'all still do the graffertagbombings even since your sober? Paranoia doesn't come into play a little bit?

 

I've had to re-learn how to paint since getting sober. I hate it. I get shook a lot more easily than i used to and the kind of spots i do have changed a lot.

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I've had to re-learn how to paint since getting sober. I hate it. I get shook a lot more easily than i used to and the kind of spots i do have changed a lot.

 

Ive been sober for nearly 12 years, so almost all of my 'graffiti career' has been in sobriety. I still paint regularly..very few days go by where I dont write on something. Ive gone through phases where I was pretty reckless completely sober and in recovery. As of late, the kinds of spots I do have changed also. Maybe im washed up, or never was, or getting old, or maturing, or going soft, or all of the above..but I am no longer into darting through traffic, staying out till dawn, getting chased/arrested. As much as that lifestyle still may appeal to me some, I have a great deal to lose now and can no longer afford to live that way. Same goes for racking. I used to put hundreds of miles on my car a day stealing things. Id like to think I was quite good at it. I am at a point now, where I no longer want to live like a scumbag...even though Im awesome at it, and often have to really have to try to act like a decent person. Somewhere along the way, I grew a conscience and no longer want to cause wreckage that I will inevitably have to try and repair later on.

 

The more decisions I make based on self..the more likely I am to hurt somebody along the way. Doing everything I wanted to do, the way I wanted to do it, never turned out so well for me.

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vicodin/hydrocodone does absolutely nothing to me....as far as a high goes.

 

as a kid one time, maybe 12 years old i took like 6 or more pills and i was fucking loaded, visuals trails....now nothing. i have had 500mg vicodins prescribed for neck pains and i can take two and dont feel shit.

 

oxy is something i have never foxed with.

 

500mg vicodins huh.

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shit i dont really remember....it was almost 18 years ago.

 

there is about 5mg of vicodin in a 500 mg pill...mostly its tylenol or some shit.

 

but i took a gang of them and i was off my ass, this was before i ever tried any drugs. i was like 11 or 12, went to the school yard and swung on the swings and laughed at shit. trees had forcefields of light on them...it was fucked up.

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I woke up the morning of this past August 6th and had a fucking epiphany and decided to stop drinking. To make a long story short, I drank moderately to heavily from 23 to 28. It got to a point around 27 where I was going out every night and having between two to six (20oz) beers at my bar, then driving home or, depending on how drunk I felt, crashing at a buddy's house and taking off in the morning. I was feeling like shit, having dizzy spells and anxiety problems because I almost always skipped dinner because I was out every night until midnight or 1 AM drinking. I was risking just about everything whenever I drove home because I'm an account representative and I spend a lot of time in the car for work; no license, no driving = no job.

 

All of that rolled up into one ball one morning (I had a close call the night prior) and I just said 'fuck it'. Let me tell you, it felt like the biggest weight had been lifted off of my shoulders; it was emotional at some points, too.

 

I have drank since then; more than a month after in Vegas for work, one beer in mid-November, drinks on vacation visiting my family (NYE and two days following). I also drank at my bar on January 15th and February 5th (SuperBowl) - both of those times, I felt like I was strong enough to just have one. Well, I had one and eventually I was at three, then four, then five. When I decided to not drink, I felt I was preventing myself from getting into a deeper and darker hole, but with my experience(s) these last two months it looks like it was a problem to begin with...

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I felt like I was strong enough to just have one. Well, I had one and eventually I was at three, then four, then five.

 

 

this is probably the single greatest reason why i have not had a drink in over 4 years. I know that I would never stop at only one, and that 2 or 3 is not enough.

 

I am a fucking alcoholic. One is too many and a thousand is not enough.

 

Props to all you cats who are doing this shit on a long term....truthfully I am surprised at how many dudes have been successful in the last 6 months. Quite a few of you, and I think that is dope.

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this is probably the single greatest reason why i have not had a drink in over 4 years. I know that I would never stop at only one, and that 2 or 3 is not enough.

 

I am a fucking alcoholic. One is too many and a thousand is not enough.

 

Props to all you cats who are doing this shit on a long term....truthfully I am surprised at how many dudes have been successful in the last 6 months. Quite a few of you, and I think that is dope.

 

Well, I am at just over a week now.

 

Do you indulge in any NA beverages, or no?

 

That has been my saving grace since I "quit". If I ever went out, it was all NA brews. During the summer I was making ginger beer cocktails with either tonic or ginger ale. It helped take the edge off when I was just getting started.

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