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Guest 7126

THE FUNNY NAMES LIST

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Guest 7126

The Funny Names List

 

An Overly Long Introduction

It is Baaaack !!!!!!

 

The LIST

 

If your looking for a long lost laugh when you see a name like Epluribus Mays or April Furst get ready.

For all of you uninitiated comiconnomenclaturists here is a little introduction.

This list consists of real names of real people. The names are funny to someone or they would not be included. Some of the names are funny because of region, some are just weird spelling. Some were named by their parents, or themselves, on purpose, some are mistakes.

The list started when I noticed that computer entry people were keeping their own short lists of names. At the Chicago Police Department Area 4 Detective Division, the computer guy also had a list from the Cook County States Attorney's Office. I typed both up and passed them out. The response was tremendous. It seems that all kinds of people kept their own lists. I got some from the Chicago Board of Education, the Juvenile Court System, private business, hospitals, etc. One lady, from Commerce Clearing House, just sent 250 names.

Once you are looking for names they pop up all over. For example my dentist, who I've gone to for years, is named Harry Shephard. This I think is funny but I never noticed until I started the list.

If you have name(s) that you think are funny please E-mail them to me. I will put you on a list to receive the updates, they are infrequent. The only thing I ask is that the names be legitimate. If possible include the whole name, even though only part of the name is funny. If there is something about the name that others would not understand please include an explanation. For example there is a street in Chicago named Irving Park. The fact that the Korean man and the Jewish women had a son and named him Irving Park would only be funny in Chicago.

Sergeant Les Smulevitz

Chicago Police Department

Albany Park, 17th District

4161 N. Pulaski

Chicago, Il. 60630

 

E Mail: leslie.smulevitz@chicagopolice.org

 

 

 

 

 

And Now The List

 

.38spec,First name only,her father's first name is Pistol

 

Abel Sanchez,His brother is Cain Sanchez

 

Adorable Virgie Goody

 

Africa S. Bartlett

 

Aheavy Hampton

 

Aids Wyatt

 

Airastede Jones, Pronounced arrested

 

Al Rukn

 

Al Pacino Smith

 

Alabama Vest, Macon, Georgia slave who invented the Kazoo in 1840

 

Alan Fierce, Attorney

 

Alcodic Plaza

 

Alexander S. Flesh

 

Alias Comen

 

Allen R. Toothaker

 

Almighty Four Hundred, This was a legal name change that was used to honor his street gang. Originally named John Smith

 

Alphasigmaphi, First name only. The parents certainly take the fraternity thing far

 

Alvin Trivelpiece

 

Amber Corn

 

Amber Bottoms, 3 month old homicide victim

 

Amer & Ica, First names only of twins

 

America Tripplett

 

America Bysa

 

Amiable Lottmann

 

Annabel Elliot Outhouse, Author of the book Privies on Long Island

 

Annette Funicello Miller

 

Annoy Lee

 

Anthelen Unsel

 

Anu & Enu KMT, These two guys were fraternity brothers in KMT. They legally changed their names and opened a vegetarian restaurant Delights of the Garden in Atlanta. This restaurant does not cook any food but serves all of it raw. Another example of the Greek Societies members going nuts

 

Apostol Postol

 

April May Rains

 

April Chowers

 

April Showers

 

April Furst

 

April Love

 

April Cott, Sister is June Cott

 

April Monday Austin

 

Aquamarina Velvet

 

Aquarius Waters

 

Ar'son Jones

 

Areola Jones

 

Ari B. Good

 

Ariisted Johnson, Pronounced arrested

 

Arise Lewis

 

Aristotle Schwartz

 

Aristotle,Pronounced Arista Lee

 

Arizona Rickets

 

Arizona Collier

 

Arlo K. Funk

 

Armand Hammer, U.S. Industrialist, Occidental Oil, who dealt heavily with U.S.S.R.

 

Armin Hand

 

Armistice Day Richardson, Of course he was born on 11 November

 

Artherites Mann, Pronounced Arthritis

 

Artimis Bobo, Brother is Starsky Bobo, Sister is Sahara Bobo

 

Artist Easter

 

Assdrubal Rizzo

 

Atherdope Harris

 

Atlantis Harvey

 

Australia Dykes

 

Australia Johnson

 

Ava Maria Pasqinelli

 

Babbey Johnson

 

Baby D. Waits

 

Barefoot Sanders, U.S. Judge in Texas

 

Barry Metric, don't you wish he was a weatherman

 

Basher Naser

 

Basil Chessman

 

Battle Rankin

 

Battleship Gray

 

Bea Kuhl

 

Beauty L. Carter

 

Beauty Mark Lee

 

Beco Weedman

 

Bee Holy

 

Bee Ready, Perhaps a Boy Scout leader?

 

Beethoven Askew

 

Belch M. Daloon, Female

 

Bequethal Brown

 

Berestfull Jackson

 

Bernard Judge, Editor of the Chicago Daily Law Bulletin

 

Bespectacle Anderson

 

Bible Brandon

 

Big Hands Jackson

 

Billy Dilly, Oklahoma bomber Tim McVeigh's Army roommate

 

Birdie Korne

 

Blossem Isreal

 

Blossom White

 

Bluta Lumpkins

 

Bobcat Rucker

 

Boogaloo Payne

 

Boy Fredrick

 

Brain Cancer, His mother wanted to name him Brian, but spelled it wrong

 

Braniff Hover

 

Bright Sheng, Pronounced Shine, Composer in Residence, Lyric Opera

 

Brown Brothers Harriamn

 

Bryant Disco Boozer

 

Bugliss Collins Jr.

 

Bugliss Collins Sr.

 

Bunker Hill

 

Bunny Nightwalker Hatcher,Senior Staff Consultant, Human Relations Commission, L.A. County

 

Bunny Ann Grabonski

 

Burt G. Pohrman, In Oregon bankruptcy court

 

Bushair Zuby

 

Buster Vinegar

 

Buster Hyman

 

C. Sewell Weech Jr.

 

C.W. Crumpecker Jr.

 

Cain Sanchez, Brother of Abel Sanchez

 

Caldron Williams

 

Caleb Belove

 

Calvert Crudup

 

Canary Woodland

 

Candee Carton

 

Candy Clump

 

Candy Barr

 

Candy Kane

 

Capers C. Funnye, Afro-American Rabbi

 

Car Richardson

 

Carbon Petroleum Dubbs III

 

Caress Owens

 

Carmel Crisp

 

Cashondat Hubbard

 

Casino Westly

 

Cassius Clay, Not Ali but a child

 

Cater Evans

 

Cecyle Pickle

 

Cellars Jackson

 

Chacko, First name only

 

Chain Robbins

 

Chainti Seals

 

Champaigne, age 2

Chardonay, age 1

Chablea, age 3 months

All of these children were abandoned by their mother Shannon Cooper

 

Charles Outlaw, He's a car thief

 

Charles Terrible, New Jersey Deputy Atty General

 

Charlie Clam, High School Counselor

 

Charlie Altoona, I wonder what Star Kist would say to him

 

Cheers Boozer, Convicted rapist

 

Cheri Dan Westmorland

 

Cherry Veronica Coke

 

Chester Fields

 

Chicago Politics all of these guys regularly use the first name of Dick.

Dick Phelan, Former Candidate for Governor in Illinois.

Dick Devine, Former Chicago Park District President, recent U.S. Senate Candidate. Used to work in Dick Phelan's law office. Currently Cook County State's Attorney

Dick Daley, Actually Mayor Daley uses the name Richie or Rich

 

Chinette Gilmore

 

Choice Eng

 

Choral Pepper

 

Chris Cross, Works at the U.S. Dept. of Education

 

Chris Craft, N.A.S.A. spokesman

 

Christian Prince, Yale student, Murder victim

 

Chrysanthamun Turnipseed, Brother of Hyacinth

 

Chubby Rover

 

Ciced Jones, say Secede

 

Cicero C. Sessions

 

Cicero Unique Gibson

 

Cipher "Anderson", He is a famous cryptologist and a professor of mathematics. I am not sure of his last name but his father, who was one of the men that broke the Enigma Code, gave him that first name

 

Claimate Franklin

 

Claribel Pantotas

 

Classic Ganit

 

Classy Baily

 

Clay Head, Brother of Dick Head

 

Clear Huddleston and his younger brother Clair Huddleston

 

Clement Harbour, Oak Park Detective

 

Clevester Reed, His twin is Levester

 

Clevland Brown

 

Cliff L. Drinkwine

 

Collie Rohme, Perhaps Lassie can find him

 

Commodore D. Roberts

 

Condor Soaring

 

Cornelius Tollfree

 

Corvette Burrell

 

Cosmic Wonder Crocket

 

Courvosier Martell

 

Crayon Coles

 

Crayonella Smith

 

Crazetta Davis, Mother wanted to name her after her dead father, Craig. Craigetta did not sound right to the mother. The father, Craig was killed while fighting with a DEA Agent

 

Crystal Clear

 

Crystal Seals

 

 

Crystal Bright

Diamond Bright

Sparkle Bright

Merry Joy Bright, all of the same family

 

Cuntrenna Wright

 

Curly Cration, brother is Timeless Cration

 

Curry Oates

 

D. Patrick Mullarkey, Dept. of Justice

 

Daiquiri Collins

 

Daisy Infante-Sampang

 

Daisy Field

 

Darko Pozar

 

Darling Lemon

 

Darreng Maiden

 

Dartanya Porche

 

Dartanyun Riggs

 

Dashaund Coleman

 

Daury Freese, It would be nice to order a Dip Top cone from him

 

Davey Crockett, Male black, rapist

 

David Wimp, This guy uses a adding machine to add the number 1 over and over until he gets to a million. This is his hobby

 

David Warmflash

 

David L. Yunich

 

Dean Dickie, An Attorney with the Dick Phelan law firm

 

Deathena Barr

 

Decal Dyke

 

Decatur Duplesses

 

Deflector Sears

 

Defray A. Calcote

 

Delaware Dawkins

 

Delerius Woods

 

Delight Cherry

 

Denman Moody

 

Denny Manymules

 

Dent Teen Murray

 

Deogracias Ruiz

 

Depravism Hozier

 

Derail Easter, Police Officer, I don't know if it's the same guy but Derail Easter was a motorman on the Loop elevated train in 1976 when his train jumped the tracks

 

Detroit Dunn

 

Devil A. Drink

 

Devon Showers, It seems that Devon killed Belmont while on Sheridan. At another time Devon killed Hubbard, all Chicago Street Names

 

Dewana Ball, Dewana is a 260 pound female

 

Dewey Drain

 

Dexter Duck

 

Diamond Bright

 

Diamond Robbins

 

Diamond Ringold

 

Diarria Knox

 

Dick Eater

 

Dick Head, Brother of Clay Head

 

Dill Pickle

 

Dimple Dang

 

Disire Vasquez

 

Dixie Kopp

 

Dizzy Bell

 

Dobbin Fox

 

Dog Doggy

 

Don Juan Evans, He is a rape offender

 

Doomsday Jones

 

Dorcus Withers, Homicide Offender

 

Dort Fauntleroy

 

Dovey Roundtree

 

Dr. Needle, Sorry not an anesthesiologist

 

Dr. Kneebone, Chiropractor

 

Dr. Waters, Urologist

 

Dr. Mangle, Chiropractor

 

Dr. Hyman, Gynecologist

 

Dr. Morbia, Cardiologist

 

Dr. Carver, Forensic Pathologist

 

Dr. Clay Hammer

 

Dr. Bonebreaker

 

Dr. Winke, Optometrist

 

Dr. Roger Slaughter, Trauma ward physician at Cook County Hospital

 

Dr. M. Cholera

 

Dr. Noble Emdee

 

Dr. Goldfinger, Gynecologist

 

Dr. Renee Hartz, Cardiac Surgeon

 

Dry Ice Washington, He says "peoples call me Dry Ice because even though I'm smoking I'm still cool". Dry Ice is his legal name

 

Duckey Bill

 

Duel Adams

 

Dumore Hardman, Most women would love this guy

 

Durwood S. Laughinghouse

 

Duwana Early

 

Dwight Christmas, Convicted rapist

 

E. Pluribus Mayes

 

Earl E. Bird, Head of an animal rights group

 

Early Wynn, Chicago White Sox pitcher

 

Earthaline Johnson, Daughters name is Mayola

 

Easter Hunt

 

Easter Sunday

 

Easterbasket Montgomery

 

Eater Bush

 

Ebony Black

 

Ebony Jeans

 

Eid Abu Hashish

 

Either Davis

 

Elevator Hudson

 

Eliz Endlicher

 

Elwood Cluck, Attorney

 

Emma Piggee

 

Enola Gay Bender

 

Epluribus Mays

 

Eric Gotobed, Lives in Little Snoring, England

 

Ernest Edsel

 

Ether Green

 

Ethereal Green III

 

Etoyal Farmer Ferguson, Brother of Hosia Farmer

 

Eulogi Rivera

 

Evangelist Jackson

 

Except for Deoder, who owns a beauty shop, and Stank, who I think should contract with Deoder, these names are not that strange but they all came up in the same murder investigation at a beauty shop

Roosevelt Gator

Deoder Brown

Encino Vargas

Capri Stank

Queen West

 

Excon Scruggs

 

F. Lies Camper

 

Factory Spears

 

Faith Dent

 

Famous Jefferson

 

Famous Ware

 

Famous Stubblefield

 

Fang Fang

 

Faye McCall Wham

 

Felin Quist Rushing

 

Fellonise Daniels

 

Felon Goodman

 

Felony Evans

 

Female Johnson, pronounced Fee Molly

The whole thing with the names Female and Male is interesting. When a child is born and the parents do not immediately give it a name the hospital refers to it as Female or Male with the mother's last name. Many people seem to leave the kid with that name. While working with newborns at Cook County Hospital my wife encountered many kids named Female. She once asked a mother where she found such a pretty name. The mother said that the doctors named the baby and she decided she liked it.

 

Fidel Cicero

 

Finuf Cacksakker, In Florida bankruptcy court

 

Flake Wells

 

Flatonia Joiner

 

Flavius Freeman

 

Flora Goo

 

Florida Luster

Former president, Luster Hair Products, her husband is Precious Luster

 

Fong Goo

 

Fook Quan Goon

 

Forest Nutter, Wisconsin teacher of the year, 1991

 

Forest Lovely

 

Forest Ranger

 

Forrest Hunter

 

Forrest Woods, Forrest live on Park Ave. in Forest Park

 

Forrest A. Plant

 

Forrest Flood

 

Forrest Aggie Sales

 

Forrget Nicole Leavy

 

Fred Fraction

 

Fuzzy Hooks

 

G. Severe Cole, Attorney

 

G.O. Rilla, Initials only

 

Gail April Showers

 

Galactica L. Pope, nickname Battlestar (sic)

 

Gary Cowman, spokesperson, National Cattleman’s Association

 

Sherry Marsala

 

Viperella Pinkstaff

 

 

 

 

 

Gazzola Vaccaro Jr.

 

Gene Poole

 

General McArthur Ware, He will not return, he was beaten to death after he climbed into the wrong person's car to sober up.

 

General Mack Varner

 

Genghis Kahn Harris

 

George E. George, George P. George, Brothers

 

Geronimo Pagen

 

Gimme Rush

 

Ginger Snap

 

Ginger Sugar

 

Glacoma Tamburello

 

Glade F. Flake

 

Gloria A. Sepsis, In hospital for a chronic infection

 

God Coleman

 

Godzilla Gorilla Pimp Hunter, 3 year old

 

Goldeen Bell

 

Golden Butts

 

Golden Brown

 

Gonorrhea Jones

 

Gordon Babyruth Fred

 

Grady Guilty

 

Green Flowers, Cop killer

 

Greene Black, D.D.S., Southern IL. dentist who is considered the Father of Modern Dentistry, perhaps the name refers to the color of teeth

 

Guilty Blake

 

Ha Ho, Arson Victim

 

Haawiaa Cherokee

 

Haley Rainey, His nickname is Lightning

 

Halitosis Harris

 

Hammer Budge, S.E.C. Chairman

 

Handel You

 

Handsome Johnson

 

Handy Cheeks Jr., Convicted rapist

 

Hans Christian Anderson, His nickname is "Executioner" he is a memeber of the El Rukn Street Gang

 

Happy Camp

 

Hardy Buzzard

 

Harmut Broghammer

 

Harron Honey, Tasty sounding isn't it?

 

Harry F. Twickler

 

Harry Port, He was convicted of killing his lesbian wife

 

Harry Seals

 

Harry Flower

 

Harry Shepard

 

Hehirtus Bryan

 

Heidi Doody

 

Hendon Chubb

 

Henry Chin Goo

 

Herrestine Burns

 

Hiawatha Cherry

 

Hiawatha Moss

 

Hightower Smith

 

Hillard Homes, The same name as a group of Housing Authority buildings in Chicago

 

Ho Ha

 

Ho-Wing Sit

 

Homer Goforth Homer, 1989 man with the worst driving record in Illinois

 

Homicide Byrons

 

Honey Combs

 

Hornsby Mims

 

Hu Suk, Female Korean

 

Huffing Williams

 

Hugh Munn, He is the South Carolina Law Enforcement spokesman

 

Hugh B. Sweet

 

Hum Lewis

 

Hung Wang

 

Hurrah Johnson

 

Hy Wind, Past president of a synagogue

 

Hyacinth Turnipseed

 

Hyacinths R. Turnips, This is an alias used by Hyacinth Turnipseed

 

I. Itchinose

 

I’m trying to work up a car thing, this is all I have so far.

Steven Buick, shot & killed his 7 year old son in Villa Park, Il.

Dean Olds, accused of arranging the murder of his wife in Wilmette, Il.

 

Illinois Turner

 

Ima Hogg, This one is the daughter of a former Governor of Texas. I don't know if she is also the pianist. I have an unconfirmed name of Ura Hogg who is supposed to be Ima’s sister

 

Ima Hogg, Famous Pianist

 

Ima Birdwhistle

 

Iona Ford

 

Irather Morse

 

Iris Flowers

 

Irish Greene

 

Irish Green

 

Iron Moon

 

Iron R. Tootle, Owner Tootle Oil Co.

 

Irony & Omen, Brothers, first names only, the parents planned on having a girl. The name they chose for her was Despairing Mist

 

Irwin Fuchsadoff

 

Itch Baines

 

Ivory Snow

 

Iwona Kus

 

J. Gaylord Cox, Former U. of I. professor, Gay Rights activist

 

J.B. Dataway

 

Jack Plum, his sister is Jill

 

Jack Ripper, Representative from Oregon

 

Jacqueline Around

 

Jagoff Jackson, Auto thief

 

Jail Soria

 

Jamshed Butt, N.Y. cab driver that got stiffed on a fare from JFK to Troy, Michigan. The fare was $2,000. plus $250. in traffic tickets

 

Jar Hompungphoo, Twin brother of Jas

 

Jaun L. Person

 

Jaundice Mahaffea

 

Jeffery Falick, rabbi

 

Jerre Birdsong

 

Jesse James, Three guys by that name currently live in Chicago

 

Jesse James, This Jesse is the Treasurer of the State of Texas

 

Jill Plum, brother is Jack Plum

 

Joe Friday , Head of the National Weather Service

 

Joel Dollarhide, accountant

 

John Yesno

 

John Outhouse

 

John Sukup Jr.

 

John E. Grayson, Sister is Johnny Grayson

 

John Hotwang

 

John Knowles Payne

 

John Outlaw, Cook County Sheriffs Deputy

 

Johnnie Walker Redd

 

Juana Lick

 

Judge Jolly, A judge in California

 

Judge Hardy, Police officer

 

June Cott, Sister is April Cott

 

Jungle L. Taylor

 

Justice Marshal Smith

 

Justin Case, Instructor at Brother Rice High

 

Jutwan Ray, say Jew Town

 

Juvenile Hall Lewis Jr.

 

Kalliopi Zafriratos

 

Kane Garreau, Is he from the land down under?

 

Kanshica and Kinshica, Twin sisters

 

Kelly Green

 

Kenneth Payment, Attorney

 

Kenya Cook

 

Kieth Penis, This was his name as listed on an arrest report for a Sex Crime. It turned out his real last name was Penex

 

King David Washington

 

King George Frisby

 

King David Nolen

 

Kingsley Fink

 

Kissa Bonner

 

Kitty Chow

 

Knowledge Clark Jr.

 

Korea Berry

 

Kris Kringle

 

Kumsuk Saringer, Her boyfriend broke her jaw

 

Lacy Clay

 

Lacy Hair

 

Lacy Armour

 

Lance Boyle

 

Lane Laneboys

 

Laone Willes

 

Lapunzel Wade

 

Largeaanpa Covington

 

Larry Derryberry, Oklahoma Attorney General

 

Larry Moe, I hope his brother is named Curly

 

Lasagna Blanks

 

Lastime Ratcliff

 

Latarshit Jackson

 

Latherio Meadows

 

Latraviata Woodhouse

 

Latreat Riddle

 

Latrine Gather

 

Latrine Philpott

 

Lavoris Dorsey, Mother of Abandit Dorsey

 

Lavoris Jones

 

Lawyer Sykes

 

Lawyer Helen

 

Learned Hand, Judge

 

Lee Lovelady

 

Legover Moses

 

LeGrande Poor

 

Lemon Works, Former high ranking Chicago Police official

 

Lemonia Works, Daughter of Lemon Works

 

Lepoleon Swopes

 

Lesbia Martinez

 

Lethal Hayes

 

Levester Reed, Brother of Clevester Reed

 

Libra Scales

 

Lichard Wilson

 

Light Keeper, Maintenance man for J.C. Penney's. One of his job was to change the bulbs

 

Lilly White

 

Lilly Easter, Killed her 2 year old foster son

 

Lionel Tiger, Naturalist

 

Litt Spears

 

Little Anthony Billups

 

Little Redhouse

 

Lolly Popp

Sody Popp. Sisters

 

Lorelei Paradise

 

Lothar Vashoz

 

Lotta Fish, The L. Fish chain of furniture stores in Chicago started by her husband in the 1870's. Guess what the L. stood for.

 

Love Lovelace

 

Love Everlasting Jones

 

Lovie Perkins

 

Lovlace G. Love

 

Lowe Myles, He’s a radio producer, not a used car salesman

 

Loyal Byrd

 

Luckie Clutse

 

Lucy Lacy

 

Lullaby Hill

 

Luncheon Sails

 

Luntine Bobo

 

Lyle Kyle

 

Magazine Christy

 

Mahesh Dikshit

 

Maim Sugermayer

 

Major Senior Sr.

Major Senior Jr.

 

Major Downer

 

Manuel Soberanus

 

Maple Knight

 

Marc Loveless, 1st openly gay appointee to Cook County Human Rights Commission

 

Marcella Fullilove

 

Marco Polo Cantu

 

Marijuana Pepsi Jones

 

Mariola Arriola

 

Marquess Queensbury

 

Marshall Gun

 

Martell Lee

 

Martini Meeks

 

Marvelous Suddeth, Murderer

 

Marvil S. Summer

 

Mary Christmas

 

Maryland Kitchen

 

Matthew Rambottom

 

Mavrick Thigpen

 

Maximillian Hell, Jesuit Priest, teacher of Machiavelli

 

Maya Kolpa, Politician

 

Mayola Reynolds, Mother is Earthaline

 

Meander Franklin

 

Melody Heard

 

Mentis Non Compis

 

Mercedes Bens

 

Mercedes Pink

 

Mercedes Byberg and her sister Lexis Byberg

 

Merry Christmas & Noel Christmas, Twins

 

Merry Joy Bright

 

Midnight Coleman

 

Mike Stonebreaker, Middle line backer, Chicago Bears football team

 

Million Aire

 

Milton Bradley, Witness to a homicide, probably learned that life is not a game

 

Ming T. Merciless, At least that is the name this person used when registering his car and getting license plates #CYS438

 

Minnie Pig

 

Minnie Storey

 

Minnie Kidds

 

Minor Wisdom, U.S. Circuit Court Judge in Tennessee

 

Mirrer Peek

 

Mona Lisa Bush

 

Monte Carlos, Radio Producer, KQED in S.F.

 

Montreal Blakeley

 

Mortisha Byrd

 

Motel Moorehead

 

Mousa Tineh

 

Muffy Lemieux

 

Mumtaz Japanwalla, She calls herself Jane

 

Muse O. Salami

 

Muthill Maddox

 

Mutt Standefer

 

Myrtly Quay Spain

 

Nacurvie Smith

 

Naket Reggs

 

Napoleon Washington

 

Narcissus Love

 

Narley Criss

 

Nature Lawrence

Casanova Johnson

Utopia Edwards

Sparkles Wages

All of these children attend the same school, same grade

 

Neamon Beamon, Burglar

 

Nefriteria Webb

 

Nevada Romance Harris

 

Nick Odeamas, "Litn'n" on the Amos and Andy television show

 

Noble Dick

 

Nosmo King, Not related to Nosmoking Jones

 

Nosmoking Jones

 

Notorious Ellis

 

Notrial S. Clark

 

Null & Boyd, Law firm in Boston, a partnership between Jessica Null and Maria Boyd

 

Nympha Maturi

 

Olympia Snow, Member House of Representatives from Maine

 

Omar Sharif Ford, 15 year old caught with a fully automatic 30 shot TEC 9 assault pistol

 

Ommen Brown

 

One Cancel Jr.

 

One Nite O. Love Washington

 

Ontario Wilkins

 

Opehelia Pullett

 

Ora L. Thomas

 

Oralique Solia

 

Orange Apple

 

Orange Washington

 

Orapin Duangplay

 

Oscar Omar Avila Wong

 

Outlay H. Meyer

 

Overby Williams

 

P. Yu

 

Page Belcher

 

Paige Turner

 

Palto Foufas

 

Paris Singer, not Piaf but of the Singer Sewing Machine Family

 

Paris Brewer, Murderer

 

Pashon Prude

 

Passion Fullilove

 

Passion Blue

 

Pat Mummey, Coroner, Spokane Washington

 

Patsy Dena Hill

 

Pearly White, Afro-American school principal

 

Pee Wee Ching

 

Peeper Leeper

 

Penney Candy Rivers

 

Penny Ury

 

Percival Pretti

 

Percy Pleasent Love

 

Perpetual Levy

 

Perry Dice

 

Pete & Repete, Identical twin brothers

 

Peter Wacker

 

Peter Sackrider

 

Pharmecca Posley

 

Phebruary, first name only

 

Philander Hopkins, Home invader of the elderly

 

Philander Rodman, Dennis Rodman's, of basketball fame, father. Philander has 27 children. He currently is living with 2 wives and 15 children in the Philippines

 

Philandred Spears

 

Philmore Iskowich

 

Phines Kennedy, Say finest

 

Phlimsey Head

 

Phylistine King

 

Picabo Street, pronounced Peek a Boo, U.S. Olympic Gold Medal Skier

 

Pink Oliphant

 

Pinkey Jones

 

Pither Webster

 

Placenta Harris

 

Placenta Jones

 

Plato Papps

 

Plato Foofas

 

Pleasant Weathers

 

Please Ransom Jr.

 

Pleasent Moon

 

Pleasure Heard

 

Polysteen Nettles

 

Ponder Riley

 

Poppin Cox

 

Possible Crawford

 

Precious Valentine

 

Precious Ivy

 

Pretti Patel

 

Preventive Johnson

 

Price Topping

 

Price Gaines Jr.

 

Primitave Mercado

 

Primrose Battle Jr.

 

Prince Moon, sister is Princess Moon

 

Prince Smooth

 

Princess Pimpinella Hohenholoe

 

Proffesor Resto

 

Progress Always Lloyd, North Carolina bank robber

 

Prosper Raymond

 

Purification Pastor, Rapist

 

Pussy Flowers

 

Pye R. Squire

 

Quarter Harris

 

Queen Ester Washington

 

Queen Ester Green

 

Queen Estelle Bishop

 

Queen Love

 

Queen Cuellar

 

Queen Green

 

Queenielove E. Minor

 

Quittin Watts

 

Quovadis Nabors

 

Quovadis Davis

 

Rabbi Brief, Rabbi is his tittle, I do not know his first name. We can only hope his sermons are such

 

Raisen Caine

 

Randy Radish

 

Rapfew Daniel

 

Raphead Lopez

 

Rattler Hatful

 

Reapunzel Wade

 

Regina Hoover

 

Reginald Absorbine Jr.

 

Regional Aldridge

 

Rev. Manger

 

Reverend, Elder E. Toaster, International Church of God. The side of his van reads, "Known Internationally as E.T."

 

Rich Mann

 

Rich Port

 

Richard Shiting

 

Richard Bodyfelt

 

Rick O'Shea

 

Ricky Raspberry

 

Rip Van Johnson

 

Risque Beavers

 

River, Leaf, Rain, Liberty, and Summer Phoenix

All of the same family, River is the actor, Leaf is the brother the rest are sisters

 

Roach Lee

 

Robert Krophol

 

Rocky Craft

 

Roderick Guilty

 

Roland Burglar

 

Rollin Hoard

 

Ronald McDonald

 

Ronald Bedgood

 

Ronald Dickover

 

Ronald Williams II, Brother of Ronald Williams III

 

Ronly Bonly Johnson, His real name is R.B. Johnson but some bureaucrat said initials have to be followed by the word “only”

 

Rope Jeffries

 

Rose Cohen

 

Rose Bowels

 

Rose Budd Redish

 

Rosie Redd

 

Rosie Cheeks, While she was locked up in Cook County Jail she still managed to get pregnant

 

Rotunda McClain

 

Rotunda Davidson

 

Ruby Sunshine

 

Ruby Duckins

 

Ruffles Brown

 

Rufus Raspberry

 

Rufus T. Firefly, This was a character name used by Groucho Marks but some poor person has this for their real name

 

Rupert Roach, Arrested with a small amount of cannabis

 

Rush Lyons, Nickname "Crazy Lips'

 

S.E. Senior Sr.

 

Safety Furst

 

Sahara Bobo, Sister of Starsky and Artimis

 

Saint Mary Harris

 

Salem S. Salem, Guess his middle name

 

Salmineo Jones

 

Sam Duckhoon

 

Samuel Camel, Armed Robber

 

Sandy Sea

 

Santa Claus, According to his State ID Card he lives in Winter Wonder Land, IL. and on the Pana Reindeer Farm in Pana, IL.

 

Sayonara Bey

 

Schmeara O'Donnell

 

Scone Blazer

 

Scoot Falkner

 

Scott Towle

 

Seaborn Buckalew

 

Semaj Reynolds, Mother's current boyfriend, but not the father of the child, wanted the baby named after himself, James. Mother thought under the circumstances the backwards James would be funny

 

Semetric B. Zims

 

Sendor Lumpkin

 

Sensious Brinson

 

September Melody Seals

 

Shanda Lear

 

Shandtanta Jackson, Twin sister is Shandtnana

 

Shed Willis

 

Shenoon Shy

 

Shep Heard, Police Sergeant

 

Sherman Tankskey

 

Sheryee Harddick, sister of Luevater Harddick

 

Shiney B. Brown

 

Shirley A. Bushyhead

 

Shirley I. Truly

 

Shitanya Robinson

 

Shonda Synthia Burgess, In Yiddish the word Shonda means an "embarrassment"

 

Shonda Leer, The parents pronounce it Chandelier

 

Shonice Johnson, She says Sure Nice

 

Shuggie Otis

 

Shunion Shine

 

Shyny, First name only

 

Signora Jona

 

Silester Gilty, Police Chief, Ford Heights Il.

 

Sinbad Abdula

 

Sing N. Nigger

 

Sir Lancelot Williams

 

Sirloin Satisfield

 

Skip Collector, Associate Director, The John Laroquette Show

 

Sleety Barnes

 

Smokey Forester, Sound mixer Universal Studios

 

Snow White Tamayo

 

Snow White, This young lady worked with my daughter at the Disney Store in a mall near Austin, Tx.

 

Somchit Inthisack

 

Soo N. Choo

 

Space George

 

Sparkle Bright

 

Sparkle Hayter, She is a reporter at CNN

 

Sparkle Champion

 

Spongetta Brown

 

Spotswood I. Qimby

 

Spotsworth Christmas III

 

Springfield Reifel

 

Starlette Jones, Assistant Attorney General, Baltimore County

 

Starr Saphire, Ornithologist

 

Starsky Bobo

 

Stereo Stewart

 

Sterling Gunn, Chicago Police Officer

 

Sterling Price

 

Steve Aquafresca, Apple grower and State Representative, Grand Junction, Colorado, Led a fight over water rights

 

Stillborn McGhee

 

Stone Lively

 

Sue U. Dinkelspiel

 

Sue Sun Shine, Sally Sun Shine, Sisters

 

Suing Davis

 

Sumner Slichter, Economist

 

Sun Cheary Griffin

 

Sun Tan, Burglary Offender

 

Sunday Folks

 

Sunny Cloud, Atlanta housewife who packages home drug test kits for parents to use on their kids

 

Sunny Diane Bluing

 

Sunsary Bryant

 

Superior McNair

 

Surbees Clark

 

Swing Dickey

 

Tad Manlove vs. Sterling Lemon, A court case

 

Taffie Kitchell

 

Takik D. Snipes

 

Tape Williams

 

Tatsuya & Atsuya, sisters, first names only

 

Taylor Wines, Federal Judge. I truly hope not in Northern New York District

 

Teeth Hunter

 

Tekila Robinson, Mothers name is Tijuana

 

Temperance Woods

 

Tera Sunder

 

Terrain Walker

 

Terrance Figures

 

Terry Cherry

 

Thakton Hemlock

 

The C. Sargent

 

Thee Weathers

 

Theopholis Baldman

 

Thomas Goldtooth Begay

 

Thumneater Davis

 

Thye Law

 

Tiarra Tops

 

Tiffany & Taffany, Twin sisters, first name only

 

Tijuana Robinson, Daughter of Tekila

 

Tillie Willie Zeiss

 

Timeless Cration, Brother of Curly

 

Tiyapholiniece Dingle

 

Tomaine R. Grissom

 

Tondria Green, Mother of Retondria Green

 

Topsey Jean Glantz

 

Toronto Brooks

 

Torreton Reap

 

Toyland Lewis

 

Toyota Crudup

 

Treemist Franklin

 

Triage Patterson

 

Trivia Hinton

 

Trygve Lie, U.N. Secretary General, 1946

 

Twin Baber

 

Tyzauntie Danials

 

Ubiquitous Perpetuity, A California nudist who says God gave him this new name

 

Udon Givafux, I have his mugshot and his expression matches his last name.

 

Uinckley Franklin

 

Ulfoncle Gilot

 

Umit Kapan

 

Under White

 

Undrains Hall

 

Unique Hills

 

Urban Queen

 

Urinal Martin

 

Urinalysis Scott

 

Valance Butcher

 

 

Valiant Brown

 

Vandel Victors

 

Varmit Nelson

 

Vathansombat Kanniga, Afro-American female

 

Vaya Condios Shuman, Law Review Editor

 

Vendetta Shavers

 

Venitian Samples

 

Vern Fern

 

Vestibule Hall

 

Vicki Fucks, Manager at Midwest Magazine Services for WorkBench Magazine

 

Victory Island

 

Victory Pearl Harbor Island Jr.

 

Vincent Money, Theft Victim

 

Virgin Marrero

 

Virgin Fullalove

 

Virginal Hollis

 

Vodka Johnson

 

Wadsworth Likely

 

Wae Phoe, Whenever police ask his name his answer causes upset

 

Wagdi Anis

 

Waggoner Carr, Texas Attorney General

 

Wakkevil Moore

 

Walasuckrylai Piscit

 

Walter Balls

 

Walter Restored Jones Jr.

 

Wammie Wilkins

 

Wanna Sugreekunt

 

Waving Ware

 

Wax & Artificial Flower, Twins

 

Wayland Dong

 

Weedo Dingledein Dasho

 

West Woon

 

Whatcha McCallum

 

Whit Cornman, spokesperson, United States Grains Council

 

White Folks Burns

 

Wigfall James

 

Will Lee Jones, Brother of Willie Jones

 

William Wayne Justice, U.S. District Court Judge for Northern Texas

 

William Crock

 

 

Willie B. Long

 

Willie D. Shine

 

Willie Warship, Dope Dealer

 

Willie Bandit

 

Willie Oneway

 

Willie Die

 

Willy Billy Guinea

 

Wilton Sogg

 

Wince Collins

 

Wix Unthank

 

Wonderful Terrific Monds, Plays Triple A baseball for the Macon Braves and was their top prospect for 1995

 

Woodser Ann Chocolate

 

World B. Free, NBA player nee Lloyd A. Free

 

Worthy Seaman

 

Wrencher Perez

 

Wyatt Earp, Currently lives in Monmouth, Il.

 

Yahynass Tubbs

 

Young Boozer Jr.

 

Youranice Campbell

 

Zhiavago Rambo

 

Zippidy Doda Day Jr.

Zippidy Doda Day Sr.

One of my co- workers received a crime report to follow up on. Zippidy Doda Day was named as a robbery victim. The detective thought someone was playing a practical joke on him. He called the phone number listed in the report and asked for Zippidy Doda Day. The lady that answered asked him if he wanted junior or senior.

 

Zowie Bijarro, I spoke with his father, who was a stabbing victim. He said that Zowie was named in honor of David Bowie's son

 

Zucchini McCoy

 

:D :D

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Guest 7126

yup really bored....i slept all day 2day since i came home from school...and now i cant sleep and its 12:20AM.. :o

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It's NOT MINE DAMMIT

 

Originally posted by 7126

The Funny Names List

 

 

.38spec, First name only,her father's first name is Pistol

 

 

i told her slut mom it wasn't mine.

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could somebody crop that list down to the ones that might actually be mildly amusing?

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Guest spec
Originally posted by WhenOne

since i read through all that crap i felt the need to respond...

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i went to school with a guy called andrew bateson..even the teachers called him master bateson and !!!!! he lived in hand street !!! honest

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HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! THIS POST WAS DONE BLATENTLY BY A COP . I guess he thought the dumb graff kids would get a kick out of this post, I cant believe that shit!!!

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